Trudgers Fund

My journey through addiction was a subtle one. At first, no one noticed, especially not myself. With time, those closest to me began to take notice, and gently, tried to nudge me in the right direction. I wasn't exactly resistant but I did not take their suggestions to heart. It seemed my slow and steady march towards destruction was not enough cause for alarm. It took something with a little more flair, a red flag that said, "This path is killing you", for me to realize I needed help. In the fall of 2019, an accidental drug overdose caused me to have a seizure in the park and woke me up to the reality that I needed help. I was lucky to survive, but I was just as lucky for everything that followed. Not long after that fateful day, I began my time in a chemical dependency outpatient program. It was there, with the incredible people I met, that I turned my life around. My path toward addiction was an all too common one. I suffered from severe mental health problems including bipolar disorder and anxiety. Desperate for relief from symptoms I had no skills to handle, I turned to self-medicating, primarily with alcohol and marijuana. The drugs and alcohol masqueraded as a support, they brought relief and a smile to my face, but behind the scenes, they were digging me into a deeper and deeper hole. It didn't even occur to me that each draw made the psychosis more real or that every drink made the depression more severe. In the end, I was simply seeking relief, but from all the wrong sources. Through love, support, and human connection, I found the relief I had been seeking, and with it, I found a full life. Overcoming my mental health and addiction struggles was the single most rewarding experience in my life but I would be remiss if I said I had done it alone. It was only through the love and support of my family, friends, and health care professionals that I made it to the other side. I cannot express the gratitude I have for those who gave me a second shot at life, but I will make it my life's work to pay it forward. I am in school to achieve my aspirations of becoming a licensed therapist with the goal to help those who suffer from mood disorders and addiction. While this goal will take many years, I still do what I can today to begin repaying my debt of gratitude. I currently facilitate a mental health support group and an addiction support group, the latter of which I founded myself. I also use my lived experience to sponsor young men who are new to addiction recovery, guiding them as I myself was guided by those who came before me. I have found that there is no rush like impacting the lives of those around you and no drug can compare to the joy and pride I felt the first time I took a sponsee out to dinner to celebrate their one-month sober date. I will always remember the look on my sponsee's face when I asked them how it felt to be sober, the radiance and triumph on their face was infectious. That look assured me I had found my life's calling. It was validation, redemption, and purpose all in one. Recovery saved my life, and I will work endlessly to show those who still suffer that the same is possible for them. Just like sobriety, I will achieve this one day at a time.