I grew up with a single mom who sold drugs to make ends meet. I personally started using drugs when I was 12 years of age. I continued on in active addiction until I was 37 years old, 25 years with only brief moments of sobriety. What started out as a party time in life soon turned into a vicious lifestyle of meth use. I spent a good chunk of time in juvenile hall when I was an adolescent but that not deter me from the lifestyle. Most of the people I started using with would go home after the night and soon grew out of it and continued on to go to high school. I would stay out for days on end, sometimes weeks, and ended up dropping out of school the second week of eighth grade. My life continued in a downward spiral until I was 21. I went to rehab and remained clean and sober for about 3 months. When I returned home I got a job as an electrician construction. Soon I started drinking heavily but it was accepted in the field I was in, construction workers drink. Until I stopped showing up for work and eventually started using meth. I became pregnant at 28 so I ceased to use or drink during that time. My daughter was about 9 months old when I relapsed and started drinking and using. This time around I turned to the needle and got more heavily involved in crime to support my habit. I lost my job and eventually hit rock bottom. I asked my mother (clean and sober now) to watch my daughter so I could go to detox. I finished my detox and stayed sober a couple months only to relapse again. I had lost everything but I promised myself that if I didn't remain clean and sober I would go to a long-term program and that is exactly what I did. I went to a year long residential program with my then 3 year old daughter. I graduated the program with a year of sobriety. During that time I went back and got my GED. After I graduated the program I moved in with a friend and enrolled into nursing school. It was not long before I started having "a beer" on the weekends which soon turned into daily drinking. I had convinced myself that I did not have a drinking problem seeing I graduated nursing school with honors, got married, bought a home, and had a successful career as a nurse. Alcoholics don't do these things is the lie I told myself. My drinking almost killed me, the doctors gave me 6 months to live if I did not stop. I went to the hospital one night, I don't remember going, they gave me Librium to detox and off they sent me. I detoxed by myself at home and by the grace of God I have not used a drug or had a drink in 4 years. The last four years have been the best, yet most difficult years of my life. I was faced with the wreckage of my past but blessed with the promise of my future. I have redeemed time lost with my daughter and reconciled to my husband who I faced losing. I am blessed to serve the underserved population here in San Diego as a nurse. My dream is to become a Psychologist to help those who suffer from substance abuse disorder avoid the life I lived or to assist in recovering what life they have left.