Sparkle and Succeed Scholarship

From a young age, it took me longer. I’d sit and stare at math problems on paper, just stuck there. My friends would beg me to finish up, I was just so slow. I could start work at the same exact time as them and still, it could take me another hour to finish it. I felt stupid. Even though I made decent grades, that feeling never left me. My freshman year of high school I struggled with going to sleep on time because homework took me longer than it ever had before. On the inside, I was in a vicious cycle of self-hatred and procrastination. On the outside, I was making good grades, but it took me hours to complete tasks that took others 30 minutes. I did not know at the time, but all of these symptoms were signs of ADHD. One morning during English class, I broke down. I went to the nurse’s office, where after I explained how I had been feeling, she recommended that I get tested for ADHD. When I got tested and received my diagnosis, it felt relieving. For the first time, I felt like I had an explanation. But the relief was short-lived. My new medication made me feel great at first, but after a couple of months I started feeling shaky and I lost my appetite. AP testing came around and I fell right back into my old patterns. No amount of notes could help me and I was stuck. I had been diagnosed so late in the year that my school never submitted my 504 to College Board. This meant that I would be completing my AP Human Geography (APHuG) exam without extra time and typing accommodations. Luckily, I had an amazing teacher to help me. My APHuG teacher, Ms. Chang, has autism. She never hid it from our class, it’s one of the things that make her who she is. I told her about my struggles with ADHD and she made me feel understood. She helped out in every way that she could and advocated for me. Her strength and encouragement motivated me to do my best. The week of the test, Ms. Chang handed me a packet of notes that she had made for me to study. It was a small gesture, but it meant so much to me. I used the Pomodoro techniques Ms. Chang had recommended and attended her daily morning study halls. She continued to encourage me when I was anxious. She never gave up on me. The day of the test, I walked in feeling nervous. The test was difficult without my accommodations, but I never gave up. I did my best, even through the writing when I felt unconfident. I wanted to do my best for Ms. Chang. The day I received my results back, I held my breath as I clicked on the link. I scored a 5, the highest score available on the test. I immediately went to email Ms. Chang, when I saw that she had emailed me first. She told me that she was so proud of my hard work and even without my accommodations, I crushed the AP exam. Whenever I feel like ADHD is holding me back, I remember Ms. Chang. I remember that people believe in me and I can conquer anything I put my mind to even with adversities. Ms. Chang’s support made me believe in myself and every day I try to give that energy back to others.