In the Panther Regiment, we have a saying: “Leave it better than you found it.” When I started marching, I knew that it meant to pick up a messy band room after practice, but through the years, I began to realize that it truly meant to leave the entire program better than you found it.
Going into the role of junior drum major, I fully embraced the idea of creating this positive change. I decided to be an empathetic and personable leader who anyone could come to in any situation. I went to practices early and approached each new member to have a personal conversation. I learned the names of all 99 members and memorized random facts about them such as ‘Zach’s favorite tree is an oak’. These personal bonds became something to rely on, and they caused me to realize the unquestionable impact I had made.
After rehearsal, a new member, Josie, came up to me to ask the question: “How can I be the next drum major?” We’d only interacted through shared smiles during practice, occasional rounds of rock, paper, scissors between sets, passing conversation, and encouraging words. That night, I realized how impactful those small interactions were. This simple question shows that my leadership favorably impacted my bandmates to be future leaders.
Ultimately, that is the most important lesson I have learned from my time in the marching band: the weight of words. Spoken aloud or written, the words of a peer carry so much power. In my early band years, the words of the drum major impacted me heavily and inspired me after a long hard practice. Now that I am that senior drum major, I know the importance of what I say and how I carry myself. If I have a smile on my face and exude confidence in beating our crosstown rivals at a competition, the band members are confident and perform amazingly the next day. Even if I don't feel great about our chances, I know that all the band needs from me is a source of optimism, and I try my hardest to provide that for the band.
After the Panther Regiment season abruptly ended, I stood on the podium looking out at crying faces after a long, tear-filled bus ride. As I started to speak, I truly realized what the words “Leave it better than you found it” meant to me: personal growth. This program has developed me from a shy child into a confident leader and individual who speaks with conviction to encourage her peers. I’ve matured exponentially from my first step at band camp to my last step at Scholastic State Finals, and I’ve learned so much about myself from my first time conducting warmups to my last cut-off at Open Class Prelims. I’ve nurtured lifelong friendships and fine-tuned my musical talents, causing me to appreciate that being in this ensemble made me an irreplaceable and integral part of something bigger. The Panther Regiment and Winter Guard have given me so many opportunities to grow and learn, but also an opportunity to watch my peers grow in the same, amazing way. In that final speech, I told every member how proud I was of them and who they’ve become. Even if these students don’t believe in themselves, I know that I will always believe in them.
As I begin writing this application, I have just arrived home from my final competition. The end of winter guard season. This marks the official conclusion of my involvement as a performer in Bloomington South’s band program. The ending was bittersweet as I stepped out in front of my guard to receive our last award at state finals. As I look back on my 5 years in this program, I can see incredible growth in myself as an individual and in the band program as a whole. It’s easy to say color guard has been an essential part of building my skills and maturity as a young adult. Watching the band grow along with me was one of the most fascinating parts of being in this program. From celebrating a ‘participation award’ to taking home seventh place at state finals, we have undoubtedly grown tremendously each year—and so have I.
Being on the visual side of the performance, I was taught to have an immense amount of confidence. The goal of color guard is to make every action you take look intentional and impressive. Having this skill to apply to the outside world has been invaluable. Everything from job interviews to impromptu speeches has been enhanced by the confidence gained from color guard.
As my experience grew within the program, I was given opportunities to step up to leadership. I was able to serve as a mentor and a representative of the program. My final year as captain, I received the Panther Pride Award during marching band season and the “World’s Best Captain Award” from my buddy Catherine during winter guard. Being in a leadership position has also helped me develop real-world skills that will help me enormously in the future.
Working on such a unique skill involves a lot of time and practice. On top of the schedule for the band, the color guard has an additional three months of auditions and training before the season begins, plus an added day of practice each week. Participating in this activity required an admirable amount of longanimity. You have to stand strong after hours of baking in the sun and activating all the muscles in your body. No matter how many times you hit yourself with a piece of equipment, you’re expected to pick it up and do it again. Even though it sounds rough, I wouldn’t trade it for any other experience. This activity taught me the virtues of patience and persistence, which, again, will suit me well in my life after high school.
After completing my time with this program, I am extremely grateful that I have learned these skills and much more. My transition from a shy, inexperienced, and impatient eighth grader to a confident, skilled, and composed young adult was an amazing journey. This program provided me with an experience that I will fondly remember for the rest of my life.
I remember my first day of band camp like it was yesterday. I stood on the back hash mark, the right corner of our block. I had a senior to my left, the only person in my field of vision. I felt anxious, and alone in that moment. I felt that way for most of my freshman year.
At the time, I was struggling with an eating disorder, and as a result I spent freshman year with constant brain fog, barely functioning day to day. Somehow, though, band always remained a safe space. As the year went on, I managed to connect with more Regiment members, and I made friends who truly cared about me. Most of my memories from freshman year feel just as foggy as when I was living them, but the few memories that do remain, crisp and clear, are from band. One of the seniors donning a gilly suit for practice, singing Bohemian Rhapsody on a bus ride, senior circles, meeting my now boyfriend on a weekend trip, eating dinners together during band camp, listening to seniors commentate for the football game even though none of us knew the rules, the campfire at our section sleepover. I know I’ll never get my freshman year back, but I’m forever grateful that band allowed me to keep even a fraction of that time.
Sophomore year, COVID was in full swing. Our section had dwindled from seven to three. Still, we were on the field three times a week. We played music and stuck through it. That was the year I began recovery. With my eating disorder making less of an impact, I started to gain a sense of myself. The rehearsals of that year mimicked the resiliency that recovery took for me. I had to show up for myself, so I could show up for the band.
By my Junior year, I was the most senior member of my section, and took on the role of section leader. That year, we managed to grow into a four person section. For the first time, my section clicked in a way we never had before. I gained confidence, and got a lot more talkative during rehearsals. I planned the flute sleepover that year, and a sophomore and I compiled supplies to make our own section shirts, since ordering them never seemed to work out. We made shirts, and cut each other's hair. I gained back the confidence my eating disorder had stolen, and learned how to organize and effectively teach my section. By the end of that season, my section was united again, and I was excited to see where the next year would take us.
As I’m writing this, we are three weeks from the end of my senior year’s season. We head to prelims this weekend, where we’ll qualify for state for the second time in Panther Regiment history. Tonight, it’s year two of another new tradition: Karaoke night. We’ll eat pizza and steal Mr Nicholas’ field mic to sing in the band room. Most of the band refers to it as family dinner, and I think those two simple words sum up what the band means to me. I’ve gained confidence and organizational skills through leadership as a section lead and woodwind captain. I’ve learned how to manage people and honed my conflict resolution skills. But above all, I have found a family in the band program. I have a place to go where I will always be incredibly loved, and that chosen family is healing.
