Essenmacher Memorial Scholarship

My mom grew up in foster care most of her life. It's not something she often spoke about with me but when she did, the stories were terrible. She was one of the many unfortunate children who did not end up in a good loving home. My mom's experience is what made me want to be a foster parent in the first place. I knew from a young age that I wanted to be one of the good ones. To provide a stable caring home children could come to in crisis and feel safe and loved by a temporary parent. A place they could continue to be a kid without the problems of the adult world. Having now been a foster parent to multiple children in need, I never could have imagined how it would change myself and my life. Being a foster parent has greatly changed my perspective. I thought I understood what these children go through from what my mom told me, but that was only the tip of the iceberg. The things these children have seen, heard, and experienced horrify me. They also show me just how strong these children are to come out the other side, to open up and grow in my home, and to be able to trust in me or any other adult. Caring for children in the system has demonstrated how small most of my problems actually are in comparison and has changed how I approach issues in my own life. Every child I have fostered has changed me. They have changed how I appreciate the childhood and family I was lucky enough to grow up in. They have taught me new methods for gentle parenting, expressing emotions in healthy ways, and how to find joy in bad places. We navigate their issues together and I have learned many techniques and approaches to problems I never would have thought to learn otherwise. Most importantly being a foster parent has shown me that being a parent to these children is my most important role. I love my job but sometimes the hours I work get in the way of my foster children's needs. This is an issue I've been looking at how to fix, to continue my passion for nursing while fulfilling my role in foster parenting. That is why I am pursuing a Master's of Nursing in forensics so I may work in a far more flexible field of nursing and provide more consistent care to my foster children. They are the ones who inspire me to specifically work in forensics, caring for victims of abuse and neglect, and collecting evidence for use against the perpetrators. Without my involvement in the foster system, I may never have known the important role forensic nurses play. I saw firsthand how much difference a forensic nurse made when one of my foster children required their services. I want to be able to provide that to others while also being able to better care for my foster children as best I can.

I believe that in everyone’s life, there are specific experiences that have the ability to change their life course. Being a child in foster care was one of those experiences for me, and I know my life is better for it. I became part of the foster care system for the first time when I was in pre-kindergarten with one of my sisters. My sister and I had to enter foster care when my mother was determined to be unfit to care for us by the court. I remember being nervous but glad my sister and I would still be together. Then, when we got to our new home, I remember feeling secure. There was an easy peace in my new home. There was never a worry about when my parent would be home or if there would be dinner tonight. The family that took us in was more than generous and compassionate in how they cared for my sister and me. They did not discount what we had been through, but at the same time helped us adjust to a new way of living. Foster care was where I learned to be a child, a good sister, and a student. I also was patiently taught how to ride a bike with training wheels and swim for the first time. Many years after leaving the foster care system my sisters and I were again impacted by the child welfare system. Once again, my mother was determined to be an unfit parent. This decision meant that we needed someone else to help raise us. This time around the three of us were teenage girls in middle and high school. Our older age and being a sibling set of three makes getting placed together in the foster care system more difficult. My grandmother selflessly decided she would take all three of us in while we navigated our later years of school. Being adopted was another one of those life-changing experiences for me. I believe that adoption changed my trajectory in life. For the first time since being in foster care, I felt that I was in a home that supported me. I am currently a junior at The Pennsylvania State University. I study neuroscience and psychology at college, and through these studies, I can better understand how critical becoming part of the foster care system at a young age was. I am beyond grateful to have had a family take my sister and myself in during such formative years for us as children. I am also grateful that those around my sisters and I were able to recognize that it was unsafe for us to stay in our environment. I witnessed first-hand the kindness of a family to take me in and care for me as their child. Because of this experience, I am more empathetic and compassionate towards others. I believe it is essential to treat everyone equally as their background may hold individual challenges that are not obvious to strangers. I apply this attitude in everyday life as well as my work as a nursing assistant. I find it easy to care for others in vulnerable positions as I think that I can relate as I have been in vulnerable positions through my experiences with child welfare. For me, the foster care system improved my life vastly, and I will always be grateful to the family that helped me.