Billie Eilish Fan Scholarship

Billie Eilish’s songs have always had a special spot in my heart- whether it be songs I learned when first exposed to her or songs like Bad Guy, which my Dad, usually a stoic man, learned to love to sing along to. From her earliest releases to her most recent album, I have become deeply attached to every era of her evolving sound. I have truly grown up with the singer, finding myself returning to her music, new and old, as I have progressed through my life, the opening notes to any of her songs feeling like coming home. While I thoroughly enjoy her upbeat and fun songs, like my strange addiction, Lunch, and Birds of a Feather, it is her slower, more reflective songs I find myself most resonating with. Halley’s Comet, a song with a name as beautiful as the music itself, is one of my favorite songs of hers- contemplative, tender, and devastatingly beautiful. As the song fills your ears, you feel like you’re floating. The song is vulnerable to its core, exploring the feeling of falling in love with someone, despite your better judgement, in a stripped down and dream-like production. The poeticism of the love being compared to Halley’s Comet is what truly gets me, describing their love as otherworldly and yet fleeting- beautiful, and yet terrifying in its unpredictable ways. The 30th, one of her most technically, musically, and emotionally challenging songs, is another one of my favorites of hers for this exact reason. Billie showcases her impactful storytelling skills, beginning the song at first with a soft, remorseful tone accompanied by a quiet acoustic background that intensifies over time. The story reads like an account of someone trying to process their life-changing experience as the song progresses, beginning to feel like a panic attack. The way she continues her phrases without pausing to breathe as the music becomes more chaotic and intense reflects her panic building up, making you feel like you too are dealing with the near-death experience of a friend. The song resonates with me not just because of its genius and beauty, but because of the fact that Billie chose an experience that would be too difficult to talk about for so many as a way to make good by reminding listeners of just how quickly everything can change. What Was I Made For, one of Billie’s more recent songs, is popular for a reason. While the lyrics may be underestimated for being written for the Barbie movie, the composition of the song truly packs a punch, combining impactful storytelling elements with gentle acoustics. The song may be quiet, but the themes speak loudly; themes of identity loss, the search for purpose, and later, rediscovery and reconnection with oneself. Underneath the layers of unsureness, the feelings of being lost, lies an undertone of hope, an encouragement that someday those that can relate to this song can find what they were “made for.” Instead of dwelling on the hurt, on the feeling of displacement, Eilish encourages listeners to allow personal growth by searching for lost purpose, claiming that someday they will find themselves once again. While Eilish’s upbeat songs are youthful, creative, and energizing, it is her more reflective, poetic, and often melancholy songs I find myself most impressed with due to their unparalleled creativity, relatability, and authenticity; traits that truly set apart Billie Eilish’s music from her peers’.