As a young woman I was under the idea that my educational journey would lead me to the path of discovering who I am. I am currently writing this essay as a freshman at Fort Lewis College. I believe that our biggest challenge in life is building our identity. My junior year of high school, my life was flawlessly on track. I was committed to softball at Fort Lewis College. I had an established major. I thought I knew who I was and where I was headed. Halfway through my junior year my life was derailed. After months of continuous arguing my mom moved out of my house. I fell seriously ill, in and out of hospitals. On top of this, I had lost my friend group at school. And so, as we all do, I had an ugly moment in life. My grades began to fall, my choices and behavior that year lost me the respect of adults around me. Whether we choose to admit it to ourselves or not, we have all let the ugly of life wear us like a mask. I decided to no longer pursue teaching as my major, and started to lose the love for the sport that was leading me into college. As the reader of this essay you probably have figured that my life now is perfectly fine.My parents moved back in together, I found my calling to nursing and fell back in love with my sport. While ill the nurses who cared for me filled me with happiness and made me feel seen. The fact that no matter how ugly I felt or the situation felt, these nurses treated me as human. For me, that was a moment of beauty that stood out to me in a time of ugly. I remember thinking these ladies have no idea the impact they made on me that day and continue to make on me today. My entire family also works in the medical field and their stories fascinate me. And so I hope as a future nurse to be a spark of hope and moment of beauty for someone one day. I hope to find myself through giving back to others. A dream is to serve and give back to Native American populations on reservations. People who are so often overlooked. To give a voice and sense of importance back to these people. I also aspire to use the flexible hours of nursing to coach softball. I would love to give back to the community in these way. To give dreams to young women. To give them an identity in something larger than themselves.

As a young woman I was under the idea that my educational journey would lead me to the path of discovering who I am. I am currently writing this essay as a freshman at Fort Lewis College. I believe that our biggest challenge in life is building our identity. My junior year of high school, my life was flawlessly on track. I was committed to softball at Fort Lewis College. I had an established major. I thought I knew who I was and where I was headed. Halfway through my junior year my life was derailed. After months of continuous arguing my mom moved out of my house. I fell seriously ill, in and out of hospitals. On top of this, I had lost my friend group at school. And so, as we all do, I had an ugly moment in life. My grades began to fall, my choices and behavior that year lost me the respect of adults around me. Whether we choose to admit it to ourselves or not, we have all let the ugly of life wear us like a mask. I decided to no longer pursue teaching as my major, and started to lose the love for the sport that was leading me into college. As the reader of this essay you probably have figured that my life now is perfectly fine.My parents moved back in together, I found my calling to nursing and fell back in love with my sport. While ill the nurses who cared for me filled me with happiness and made me feel seen. The fact that no matter how ugly I felt or the situation felt, these nurses treated me as human. For me, that was a moment of beauty that stood out to me in a time of ugly. I remember thinking these ladies have no idea the impact they made on me that day and continue to make on me today. My entire family also works in the medical field and their stories fascinate me. And so I hope as a future nurse to be a spark of hope and moment of beauty for someone one day. But at the end of the day after letting the ugly consume in high school, I still struggle with my identity. And so my educational journey thus far may have not taught me who I am. But it has taught me who myself and others are not: We are not our past relationships, we are not defined by the popularity of our friend group, we are never the rumors spoken about us, and most importantly we are never who we once were. Life is a continuous journey of finding ourselves, of learning to fight the ugly rather than letting it consume and change us. The next time we face the ugly it’s time we chose to find the beauty in it.

As a young woman I was under the idea that my educational journey would lead me to the path of discovering who I am. I am currently writing this essay as a freshman at Fort Lewis College. I believe that our biggest challenge in life is building our identity. My junior year of high school, my life was flawlessly on track. I was committed to softball at Fort Lewis College. I had an established major. I thought I knew who I was and where I was headed. Halfway through my junior year my life was derailed. After months of continuous arguing my mom moved out of my house. I fell seriously ill, in and out of hospitals. On top of this, I had lost my friend group at school. And so, as we all do, I had an ugly moment in life. My grades began to fall, my choices and behavior that year lost me the respect of adults around me. Whether we choose to admit it to ourselves or not, we have all let the ugly of life wear us like a mask. I decided to no longer pursue teaching as my major, and started to lose the love for the sport that was leading me into college. As the reader of this essay you probably have figured that my life now is perfectly fine.My parents moved back in together, I found my calling to nursing and fell back in love with my sport. While ill the nurses who cared for me filled me with happiness and made me feel seen. The fact that no matter how ugly I felt or the situation felt, these nurses treated me as human. For me, that was a moment of beauty that stood out to me in a time of ugly. I remember thinking these ladies have no idea the impact they made on me that day and continue to make on me today. My entire family also works in the medical field and their stories fascinate me. And so I hope as a future nurse to be a spark of hope and moment of beauty for someone one day. But at the end of the day after letting the ugly consume in high school, I still struggle with my identity. And so my educational journey thus far may have not taught me who I am. But it has taught me who myself and others are not: We are not our past relationships, we are not defined by the popularity of our friend group, we are never the rumors spoken about us, and most importantly we are never who we once were. Life is a continuous journey of finding ourselves, of learning to fight the ugly rather than letting it consume and change us. The next time we face the ugly it’s time we chose to find the beauty in it.

As a young woman I was under the idea that my educational journey would lead me to the path of discovering who I am. I am currently writing this essay as a freshman at Fort Lewis College. I believe that our biggest challenge in life is building our identity. My junior year of high school, my life was flawlessly on track. I was committed to softball at Fort Lewis College. I had an established major. I thought I knew who I was and where I was headed. Halfway through my junior year my life was derailed. After months of continuous arguing my mom moved out of my house. I fell seriously ill, in and out of hospitals. On top of this, I had lost my friend group at school. And so, as we all do, I had an ugly moment in life. My grades began to fall, my choices and behavior that year lost me the respect of adults around me. Whether we choose to admit it to ourselves or not, we have all let the ugly of life wear us like a mask. I decided to no longer pursue teaching as my major, and started to lose the love for the sport that was leading me into college. As the reader of this essay you probably have figured that my life now is perfectly fine.My parents moved back in together, I found my calling to nursing and fell back in love with my sport. While ill the nurses who cared for me filled me with happiness and made me feel seen. The fact that no matter how ugly I felt or the situation felt, these nurses treated me as human. For me, that was a moment of beauty that stood out to me in a time of ugly. I remember thinking these ladies have no idea the impact they made on me that day and continue to make on me today. My entire family also works in the medical field and their stories fascinate me. And so I hope as a future nurse to be a spark of hope and moment of beauty for someone one day. I hope to find myself through giving back to others. A dream is to serve and give back to Native American populations on reservations. People who are so often overlooked. To give a voice and sense of importance back to these people. I also aspire to use the flexible hours of nursing to coach softball. I would love to give back to the community in these way. To give dreams to young women. To give them an identity in something larger than themselves.

As a young woman I was under the idea that my educational journey would lead me to the path of discovering who I am. I am currently writing this essay as a freshman at Fort Lewis College. I believe that our biggest challenge in life is building our identity. My junior year of high school, my life was flawlessly on track. I was committed to softball at Fort Lewis College. I had an established major. I thought I knew who I was and where I was headed. Halfway through my junior year my life was derailed. After months of continuous arguing my mom moved out of my house. I fell seriously ill, in and out of hospitals. On top of this, I had lost my friend group at school. And so, as we all do, I had an ugly moment in life. My grades began to fall, my choices and behavior that year lost me the respect of adults around me. Whether we choose to admit it to ourselves or not, we have all let the ugly of life wear us like a mask. I decided to no longer pursue teaching as my major, and started to lose the love for the sport that was leading me into college. As the reader of this essay you probably have figured that my life now is perfectly fine.My parents moved back in together, I found my calling to nursing and fell back in love with my sport. While ill the nurses who cared for me filled me with happiness and made me feel seen. The fact that no matter how ugly I felt or the situation felt, these nurses treated me as human. For me, that was a moment of beauty that stood out to me in a time of ugly. I remember thinking these ladies have no idea the impact they made on me that day and continue to make on me today. My entire family also works in the medical field and their stories fascinate me. And so I hope as a future nurse to be a spark of hope and moment of beauty for someone one day. But at the end of the day after letting the ugly consume in high school, I still struggle with my identity. And so my educational journey thus far may have not taught me who I am. But it has taught me who myself and others are not: We are not our past relationships, we are not defined by the popularity of our friend group, we are never the rumors spoken about us, and most importantly we are never who we once were. Life is a continuous journey of finding ourselves, of learning to fight the ugly rather than letting it consume and change us. The next time we face the ugly it’s time we chose to find the beauty in it.

As a young woman I was under the idea that my educational journey would lead me to the path of discovering who I am. I believe that our biggest challenge in life is building our identity. My junior year of high school, my life was flawlessly on track. I was committed to softball at Fort Lewis College. I had an established major. I thought I knew who I was and where I was headed. Halfway through my junior year my life was derailed. After months of continuous arguing my mom moved out of my house. I fell seriously ill, in and out of hospitals. On top of this, I had lost my friend group at school. And so, as we all do, I had an ugly moment in life. My grades began to fall, my choices and behavior that year lost me the respect of adults around me. Whether we choose to admit it to ourselves or not, we have all let the ugly of life wear us like a mask. I decided to no longer pursue teaching as my major, and started to lose the love for the sport that was leading me into college. As the reader this essay, you may have figured out that yes, everything now is perfectly fine. My parents moved back in together, I found my calling for another major and fell back in love with my sport. But at the end of the day after letting the ugly consume in high school, I still don’t know who I am. And so my educational journey thus far may have not taught me who I am. But it has taught me who myself and others are not: We are not our past relationships, we are not defined by the popularity of our friend group, we are never the rumors spoken about us, and most importantly we are never who we once were. Life is a continuous journey of finding ourselves, of learning to fight the ugly rather than letting it consume and change us. The next time we face the ugly it’s time we chose to find the beauty in it. To choosing to rise above the ugly when most fail in doing so. Learning to dance among the rain instead of waiting for the storm to pass. There’s beauty in not knowing who you are. There’s beauty in this journey we are all on together.

Softball doesn’t define you… My sports psychiatrist beamed as he said these very words to me. During my senior year of high school, I decided to bench this statement. Softball has defined every aspect of who I am. As a four-year-old little girl, I can remember the excitement I felt running around the bases for the first time. Of course, four-year-old me was unaware of which direction to take on the base path and ran in the opposite direction, sprinting to third, rounding first base, and finally heading for home. Almost fourteen years later, I am writing this paragraph at Fort Lewis College, sitting in this seat entirely because of softball. Softball has instilled in me ambition, drive, and passion, it’s given me my place in this world and for that, I cannot be more grateful. Giving me a place among a community of girls who will forever be my family. It drove me to Fort Lewis College where I received a softball scholarship and had the opportunity to pursue a career as a D2 athlete. Long competitive softball summers, traveling away from home, and failures at the plate have all contributed to the person I am today. Teaching me to overcome failure, to get up when the world throws punches your way. Softball has taught me that I am perfectly imperfect. To always strive for success, but expect failures along the way. This summer I had the opportunity to give hitting lessons to a ten-year-old girl. The life and excitement that beams off her face when she learns a new skill is indescribable and inspiring To see the smile I could put on a little girl's face purely because she wanted to learn about softball. My coaches, who chose to serve the softball community, opened the door for me to play in college. My plans after Fort Lewis involve coaching. I want to give back to the community that has taught me many lessons and blessed me with great opportunities. Coaching means instilling confidence in young girls, helping them find an identity in something larger than themselves, and giving young women a love for something that could determine their destinies. A coach, as I have learned, has the potential to ruin dreams or build upon them. Coaching entails more than teaching softball-related skills. Life lessons are learned upon playing a game. And so, I cannot imagine a life where softball is absent. Because I will forever and always be a softball player.

Nursing means giving your life to ensure others live the best version of theirs. My softball career drove me to Durango, Colorado—home to many underserved Native American Communities. Nursing and learning holistic approaches to reservations is an ambition I wish to pursue. Serving a community of individuals, who are so often overlooked. Giving back to a group of people in which much was taken from. Nursing, to me, involves setting a tone in an entire community. Allowing people to see that they are seen, and their health is vital. Ensuring through education that entire generations can be the best versions of themselves. Finding techniques that intertwine with traditional ways of life. As a nurse, I believe in instilling a community service mindset into all. How can we serve others? My time playing softball here at Fort Lewis has exemplified the importance of giving back to communities. I plan to advocate for underserved and rural communities. To envision a world where everyone has access to the care they need. At Fort Lewis College, we have been provided with so many resources to make a difference and approach medicine from a different angle. Learning how to immerse ourselves into other cultures and settings. Growing up, I was surrounded by healthcare workers. My mother who worked as a scrub tech, aiding in delivering babies has returned to the field after twenty years away. My mom and I share the same calling when it comes to helping those around us. Sharing emotions with those around us, and feeling the needs of others. During my college experience, I have gathered extensive research on traveling abroad as a healthcare worker. After graduating from Fort Lewis, I plan to accompany my mom to the Philippines over the summer to provide any necessary medical care. As my career grows, I plan to spend summers away, traveling and helping communities that are underserved around the world. The nursing and healthcare world is full of open avenues, ones I wish to soon travel on. As a future nurse, I also wish to use my free time to coach softball. Softball was my first love guiding me to Fort Lewis and steering me in the direction of nursing. When I envision my future, I can give back to the softball community which has allowed me to make so much personal growth. I hope to pave the same path for girls that I had. Giving them a road to their future.

My passions in life include softball and helping people. Helping people or giving back to your community can be done and seen in various ways. I am choosing to pursue a career in teaching as a form of giving back to my community. Teaching means giving your life to ensure others live the best version of theirs. Inspired by countless teachers who taught me that a grade does not define me, I plan to continue their legacy—guiding students to achieve their fullest potential to succeed in a field that suits them most. Teaching, to me, involves setting a tone in an entire community. Teaching people that they are seen, and their ambitions are essential. Laying the structure for a growth mindset. As a teacher, I believe in instilling a community service mindset into all. How do you plan to make today better for someone else? My softball career drove me to Durango, Colorado—home to many underserved Native American Communities. Teaching on a reservation is an ambition I wish to pursue. Serving a community’s younger generation, who are so often overlooked. Giving back to a group of people in which much was taken from. To get to Durango and play softball at a D2 level, I sacrificed my childhood. As dramatic of a statement as that may seem, I began playing softball at the age of 4. At the age of 10, I began my competitive career and dedicated all of my time to softball. Every weekend from March until late July is spent traveling and competing in tournaments. On weekdays, I drive an hour or more to various practice facilities and fields. The time spent driving does not bother me, however, I can’t remember the last time I sat down and ate dinner with my family. I have not had a birthday party since I was eight years old, as my birthday occurs on a day that we play each year. Of course, I didn’t live your typical teenage life, to maintain my grades I spent my spare time studying. Despite all these things, my first true love will always be softball. A sport that led me to my passion and led me to the most ideal and beautiful location to help people. I also figure that if my greatest worry in life is how long my drive is to a softball, I’m living a pretty fantastic life. I am so grateful for my life and the path that softball has paved for me. My time playing softball at Arvada West High School exemplified the importance of community service and steered me toward one of my future careers. My coaches, who chose to serve the softball community, opened the door for me to play in college. My plans after high school involve coaching. I want to give back to the community that has taught me many lessons and blessed me with great opportunities. Coaching means instilling confidence in young girls, helping them find an identity in something larger than themselves, and giving young women a love for something that could determine their destinies.

Seven innings. Twelve players. Chalked lines. Two umpires. Four bases. A yellow ball. It's a seemingly simple game to all who watch from behind the fence. For many teammates and me, our existence depends on hitting a ball with a stick. This game of softball appears unambiguous but serves as a metaphor for life. Tie game. Two outs. Bases loaded. An entire season is at risk. Adrenaline surges through my veins, flowing faster than electricity. First pitch. Swing and a miss. Fans become experts on softball, their corrections hanging in the air. Their words crawl under my skin, sinking themselves into my brain. Next pitch. Foul ball. Sweat slickens the grip of the bat. The juiciest meatball of a pitch is piped down the center of the plate. STRIKE THREE! Cheers from the opposing team slice of the air. Tears wrap themselves around my throat. Softball is a game of failure. Life is a game of failure. So much potential has been stripped from younger generations taught to aim for perfection. My experiences as a student-athlete have allowed me to view life through a lens many cannot. My interests lie in serving God and my community. In 2 Corinthians 12:9, God says unto Paul, "My power is made perfect in weakness." As an aspiring teacher, I hope to rewire the upbringing of younger students. My message would go as follows: People find themselves in apprehensive situations daily. Whether it's taking a test that a letter grade depends on or giving a presentation where an entire career is on the line. Everyone has failed at a time of high stakes. To be a part of the human race, it's a requirement that failure happens at least once. The concept that separates champions from the rest is their innate ability to overcome adversity. My shortcoming is the best thing that ever happened to me. Every day, humanity gets to step into that batter's box and handle whatever curveballs life attempts to throw. If we strike out, so what? We have another at bat. Success, in that next at-bat, is overcoming the strikeout and learning what we can do differently. It's about communicating with our teammates around us, allowing them to learn from our failures. Life is about learning from our mistakes rather than dwelling on them. What could I have done differently to succeed? Imperfection is beautiful, but it's only beautiful once we accept it. As humans, we stray from our defects; we attempt to shield ourselves from our mistakes. Student-athletes often construct a false identity based on success in academics and sports, as do so many other people around us, rather than allowing their identity to show the hardship they have overcome. Failure shapes us into who we need to be, which is nothing to be ashamed of. At a time when I couldn't pinpoint who I was, I sat with my family, staring into the night. It was then that I realized a night sky painted with glittering stars is the most majestic sight to any eye. But, the stars that compel its beauty are dying balls of gas. Millions of imperfections. As a student-athlete who constantly struggles with an identity of perfection, I hope to destroy that battle for future students and help them find their true identities.

Seven innings. Twelve players. Chalked lines. Two umpires. Four bases. A yellow ball. It's a seemingly simple game to all who watch from behind the fence. For many teammates and me, our existence depends on hitting a ball with a stick. This game of softball appears unambiguous but serves as a metaphor for life. Tie game. Two outs. Bases loaded. An entire season is at risk. Adrenaline surges through my veins, flowing faster than electricity. First pitch. Swing and a miss. Fans become experts on softball, their corrections hanging in the air. Their words crawl under my skin, sinking themselves into my brain. Next pitch. Foul ball. Sweat slickens the grip of the bat. The juiciest meatball of a pitch is piped down the center of the plate. STRIKE THREE! Cheers from the opposing team slice of the air. Tears wrap themselves around my throat. Softball is a game of failure. Life is a game of failure. So much potential has been stripped from younger generations taught to aim for perfection. My experiences as a student-athlete have allowed me to view life through a lens many cannot. My interests lie in serving God and my community. In 2 Corinthians 12:9, God says unto Paul, "My power is made perfect in weakness." As an aspiring teacher, I hope to rewire the upbringing of younger students. My message would go as follows: People find themselves in apprehensive situations daily. Whether it's taking a test that a letter grade depends on or giving a presentation where an entire career is on the line. Everyone has failed at a time of high stakes. To be a part of the human race, it's a requirement that failure happens at least once. The concept that separates champions from the rest is their innate ability to overcome adversity. My shortcoming is the best thing that ever happened to me. Every day, humanity gets to step into that batter's box and handle whatever curveballs life attempts to throw. If we strike out, so what? We have another at bat. Success, in that next at-bat, is overcoming the strikeout and learning what we can do differently. It's about communicating with our teammates around us, allowing them to learn from our failures. Life is about learning from our mistakes rather than dwelling on them. What could I have done differently to succeed? Imperfection is beautiful, but it's only beautiful once we accept it. As humans, we stray from our defects; we attempt to shield ourselves from our mistakes. Student-athletes often construct a false identity based on success in academics and sports, as do so many other people around us, rather than allowing their identity to show the hardship they have overcome. Failure shapes us into who we need to be, which is nothing to be ashamed of. At a time when I couldn't pinpoint who I was, I sat with my family, staring into the night. It was then that I realized a night sky painted with glittering stars is the most majestic sight to any eye. But, the stars that compel its beauty are dying balls of gas. Millions of imperfections. As a student-athlete who constantly struggles with an identity of perfection, I hope to destroy that battle for future students and help them find their true identities.

Society’s foundation is built on community service. Our world often cuts community service perimeters into those who volunteer or donate. Overlooked are those who choose to give back to their community daily. Those who choose kindness over hate. Those who show others the benefit of the doubt. Those who choose to be the light in someone else’s day. People often fail to realize that serving their community is about making it a better place. A task as simple as putting a smile on someone’s face. There are often leaders who exemplify my definition of community service. These involve coaches, teachers, parents-people who guide us to who we are. These people have the power to determine the atmosphere of an entire community. My future career goal is to teach. Teaching means giving your life to ensure others live the best version of theirs. Inspired by countless teachers who taught me that a grade does not define me, I plan to continue their legacy—guiding students to achieve their fullest potential to succeed in a field that suits them most. My softball career drove me to Durango, Colorado—home to many underserved Native American Communities. Teaching on a reservation is an ambition I wish to pursue. Serving a community’s younger generation, who are so often overlooked. Giving back to a group of people in which much was taken from. Teaching, to me, involves setting a tone in an entire community. Teaching people that they are seen, and their ambitions are essential. Laying the structure for a growth mindset. As a teacher, I believe in instilling a community service mindset into all. How do you plan to make today better for someone else? My time playing softball at Arvada West High School exemplified the importance of community service and steered me toward one of my future careers. My first love was for the game of softball. My coaches, who chose to serve the softball community, opened the door for me to play in college. My plans after high school involve coaching. I want to give back to the community that has taught me many lessons and blessed me with great opportunities. Coaching means instilling confidence in young girls, helping them find an identity in something larger than themselves, and giving young women a love for something that could determine their destinies. A coach, as I have learned, has the potential to ruin dreams or build upon them. Coaching entails more than teaching softball-related skills. Life lessons are learned upon playing a game. A coach can give a young lady skills like communication, teamwork, leadership, etc. In the meantime, I serve my community best by uplifting those around me.

Anxiety defines me. I refuse to be ashamed, as many are, of that phrase. Stigmas constructed by society have silenced those struggling with mental health. Anxiety belongs to a series of my imperfections. Humans so often attempt to hide their flaws, as opposed to owning them. As a softball player, I battled desperately to keep my anxiety from defining me. Weak. Fragile. Incompetent. Loser. Phrases I heard when my imperfection took away from my performance. I was ashamed of who I was. A shame so at large, it led me to seek anything I could to quiet the beast of anxiety. A prescription of pills quieted the beast. But, the prescription that quieted the beast also quieted my emotions. My emotions were stolen by yet another endeavor to hide my imperfection. Anyone who belongs to the human race has an imperfection, and yet we choose to judge others for theirs. Imperfection is beautiful. My anxiety is beautiful. Anxiety has allowed me to see others for who they are. In my senior year of high school, a young girl on my softball team came to me. In her words, she was losing the battle to anxiety. For the first time, I was vulnerable with someone other than a doctor. I explained to her my ongoing fight with anxiety. In allowing this girl to see my similar struggle, a smile appeared on her face. “Oh, I thought it was just me,” she said. Countless girls came to me that year with their struggles. Anxiety allowed me to help so many. Anxiety taught me that in being vulnerable with others, you are not alone in any battle. A mental health struggle is not a shameful thing as it has been made out to be. It’s so important to me that we allow others to see our flaws and accept them for theirs. Imperfection is beautiful, but it’s only beautiful when we choose to accept it. See me. See who I am. Anxiety has built me into who I am, and for that, I refuse to be ashamed. A night sky painted with glittering stars is the most majestic sight to any eye. But, the stars that compel its beauty are dying balls of gas. Millions of imperfections. As I graduate high school, I hope to become a teacher. Anxiety has inspired me to impart my experiences to a younger generation. To teach an entire group of kids that it’s okay to be vulnerable. A flaw or struggle can define you because it’s one of the many components that make you beautiful. Embracing who we are, means embracing every aspect of ourselves, even the parts we may not like. The hardest battles are given to the toughest soldiers. I believe everyone is a soldier who is attempting to overcome obstacles. But obstacles are much easier to face when we unite as an army.