My National F.B.I. Youth Leadership interview I'd looked forward to for a year. I’d filled out my application, completed my essay, and said a prayer. All to be walking into a conference room, met by Police and FBI employees. As they introduced themselves, a wave of anxiety came over me, but as the interview continued, the wave diminished, laughter was exchanged, and stories were told. Every question asked, I answered well and purposefully. Each answer was met with confirming nods and smiles, except for the one Lieutenant. He sat directly across from me, and with every answer, he’d stare at me, deeply look up at the ceiling, and then write his notes before returning his hand to his chin. His reactions made me question the answers I'd given. I heard from the FBIAA, left class, and returned teary-eyed. I thought of was the Lieutenant, and took it to heart; he must have disliked me and graded me harshly. The loss of confidence I faced weighed on me. This feeling stayed even when I applied to the local FBI Teen Academy. When I received my acceptance from the Portland FBI Field Office, my celebration felt diminished since the Lieutenant’s disapproval was still prominent. After all, he’s a high-ranking officer, and he’d know what it would take in this career. Was I cut out for this? Do I have what it takes? I had a moment at the Teen Academy, where I fully processed I'd made it to an FBI academy. Standing between office buildings with a recruiter and a Special Agent, I realized that everything I’d prepared for, even the FBIAA panel, had gotten me here. This settling feeling was short-lived when the group leader introduced our guest for the day, a Lieutenant. There he was, the Lieutenant from the panel, Joe Hogue, standing in front of me. I couldn't hide my shock, especially when he came up to me. We exchanged formalities, and then he looked straight into my eyes and said, “I don't know about everybody else on that panel, but I gave you full marks, and you know out of everyone, you could really do this”. All I could do was croak out a thank you. I wondered why I was so focused on Lieutenant Hogue. Other panel members liked what I said, and I believed the answers I gave were acceptable, so why did his reactions cause me to doubt my worthiness? I’d understood the program's competitiveness and deep down knew he had nothing to do with the rejection. I jumped straight to believing he thought critically of me, but I was the critical person in the room. Without a conscious thought, I let my assumptions shape my perception of myself. Looking to the future, I know this situation will come up again when I start to make assumptions about what someone is thinking. But now, instead of getting caught up in second-guessing myself, I will trust my abilities and ask questions when I’m not sure.

I am currently pursuing a Bachelor’s degree in International Security and Law, where I have developed a strong interest in justice, public accountability, and the role institutions play in protecting the rights of individuals and communities. My academic studies have introduced me to the legal and policy frameworks that shape security, governance, and public trust, and they have motivated me to pursue a career focused on strengthening fair and transparent systems. I have always been drawn to environments where service, integrity, and responsibility are central values. Since high school I've been apart of affinity clubs that put change as the center of their mission. I've given presentations to underclassman about BLM to help enforce a more education student body. Even experiences such as attending Portland Metro Fire Camp exposed me to the importance of public service careers and showed me how impactful it can be when institutions actively work to support and represent the communities they serve. Being in a space that encouraged leadership, teamwork, and confidence reinforced my interest in working in fields that prioritize both safety and fairness. Through my education, I’ll develop strong research, writing, and analytical skills that’ll allow me to examine complex issues related to law, policy, and accountability. I am particularly interested in how oversight, investigative work, and public policy can help ensure that institutions operate transparently and equitably. I believe that maintaining public trust requires systems that are willing to evaluate themselves, listen to communities, and adapt when improvements are needed. In my career, I hope to contribute to organizations that work to uphold justice and strengthen accountability within public institutions. Whether through policy analysis, oversight work, or investigative roles, my goal is to help ensure that laws and policies are applied fairly and that communities feel represented and protected by the systems designed to serve them. I am especially interested in positions that allow me to bridge the gap between institutions and the public by helping promote transparency, communication, and ethical decision making. Ultimately, I hope to make a positive impact by contributing to institutions that value fairness, responsibility, and public trust. I have not doubt that I will be be able to impact real positive change. Especially if I'm able to do so by combining my education in international security and law with practical experience, I aim to play a role in building systems that are more accountable, more transparent, and more equitable for the people they serve.