Ever since I was young, I have had big dreams of living a more stable life than my parents could provide. Go to college, become an accountant and live happily ever after. I lived by the quote “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.” Every time I talked about my dreams and desires for the future, both mentors and peers alike shared their skepticisms. Even through all of the doubt, I saw what I could be and what I needed to do to be the person I wanted to be.
My father became very ill when I was young, so I spent most of my childhood without an active father figure. This left me to try to learn the difference between right and wrong and left my mother to raise three children by herself, while paying for the medical bills. Even though I was unaware of my family's financial crisis, looking back, it was felt through hand-me-down clothes, thrift store shopping, and saving at any given opportunity. Although my childhood was tough, it only strengthened my dreams of living better. It also instilled a strong work ethic and moral values in me.
As I entered high school, my father’s health improved, so he became more involved in my life. Connecting with my father dictated many of my in and out of school activities, which constantly drove me out of my comfort zone and into new activities. In an attempt to connect with him in any way I could, I tried to follow in his footsteps of welding and blue collar work. I added Ag Mechanics to the plethora of extracurricular activities I was already involved in, including Band, FFA, Theater, Football, Basketball, Track & Field, UIL, and Boy Scouts. It slowly became apparent that I could no longer uphold the academic standards put on me in my household. I gradually withdrew from some of my extracurricular activities to center my focus back on academics.
To please my father, I tried to become like him. I played the same positions in football; I did the same track events as him; and I wanted to have the same job as him. I thought that if I became my father, I would gain his approval and the time we had lost. While trying to make up for lost time and make my father proud, I lost sight of who I wanted to be and what I wanted to do. During the summer of my junior year, I sat down with my father and discussed the distress I was having while trying to make him proud. During that conversation, I realized that my father never wanted me to be like him, but instead, he wanted me to be my own person with my own hobbies and interests. My father dissuaded me from following his path through life; he wanted me to find my own way and provide a better life for myself than he could offer.
While my journey through high school was difficult, it made me who I am and through the programs that I have been a part of has helped me develop a diverse set of life skills. The hardships taught me that no matter how hard life gets, I have the strength to push past any problem in order to achieve the better life that I have dreamed of.