This painting demonstrates the difficulty in moving past the grief of losing two close family members. My mom and grandma were always there for me when I needed them most. While my mom worked long hours at the hospital, my grandma taught me to paint, read, garden, and love life. It was difficult losing my mom two weeks before my seventeenth birthday in 2019 in a car accident, ruled a suicide; my grandma in February 2020, from an unknown illness. In the time after their deaths, I didn’t know where to turn. My grandma, who helped me through the process of grief following my mother’s death, was gone too. I pushed through school and worked hard to avoid the emotions. I also turned to art, something I had not done in a while because I hadn’t had time. When I began the painting process, I wanted to encapsulate the emotions experienced when moving on from the sadness. Art seemed to be the only way to show others the depth of the torment. The dull fragmented colors to the individual’s left portray sorrow and gloom. In the center of the image, the sunlight-emitting silhouette is representative of me. The figure looks forward to the more colorful future while recognizing the beauty of life around him. As he looks at the blossomed flower, he realizes that his life will come to burgeon with light and happiness if he makes the first step to heal. The primary message of the painting is to show that the environment around a grieving person will remain fragmented. However, the secret to tearing down the wall of grief is to acknowledge the beauty in the present moment and realize the light within you will allow you to march forward into a happier future.

In the first image, my city was holding its first Pride event. This event occurred a year after I came out to my family and roughly two months after my mom passed away. I was still reeling from the effects of both. The majority of my family reacted negatively to me being gay. However, when I was at the event, I faced what I feared the most: bigotry. The second picture was taken after my first LGBT Club meeting. After several homophobic incidents on my campus, I founded the club to make my school a safer place for all.