One of the biggest ways music has impacted my life during high school is my chorus class. It opened during my 10th grade year, when I was dealing with the breakup of a friendship that existed since kindergarten. It was a total upheaval of how I saw relationships. I didn't know how I fit into the rest of my social circle, and I was scared that I wasn't good at connecting with people, and maybe I had never actually connected with people at all. The thing that helped me find my anchor was that chorus class. I've loved singing since a really young age, so I was curious to see what sort of things I could learn from the class. What I found was way more than just lessons. Our teacher helped us build not just our singing skills, but a cohesive group that worked together to make beautiful music. I met some of my closest friends in that class, people who were just as enthusiastic about singing as I was. It reminded me that I could connect with people, share interests, and be a part of a community. The performance we did for that class, our final exam, made me really happy to be in the chorus. One of my favorite songs we performed was Riversong by Roger Emerson because of how much joy and color we were able to pour into it with just our voices. Even though we were in front of a crowd of students and parents, I didn't feel nervous at all because I was standing next to all my friends. Choral music is now one of my favorite forms of music, both to listen to and perform. I really adore the community that goes into it, the way each individual voice blends into a cohesive whole. It feels like magic, sometimes, when our choir director tells us to correct our vowels and in an instant we all become one sound. I continue to be a part of the high school chorus from 10th grade until now, and I want to join a choir in college too. Really, I want to continue making vocal music for as long as I can. Choirs, to me, are a space where I can meet people who love the sensation of singing together just as much as I do. Experiences like the TrebleFest at Meredith College, where choirs from across North Carolina's Triangle form a massive treble voice choir and perform in just one day, have changed the way I view relationships and teamwork for the better. Choir as a whole put me on a path towards a loving, expressive, connected world that I plan to walk for the rest of my life.

I've faced family difficulties due to being queer, especially related to my gender identity. My grandmother lives with us and is very stubborn about her beliefs, so I have been unable to freely present how I want. When I cut my hair, I managed to excuse it as being related to mental and medical issues, namely trichotillomania. But my grandmother, alongside my mother, partially, still likes to insist I would be a much prettier girl if I grew it out again, even though it brings me distress. Shorter hair just feels more like me. In college, I'm going to be moving out into a dorm, and I'm excited to be able to express myself better in a space without their pressure. I want to dress neutrally one day and hyper feminine the next and not have any of that be scrutinized so heavily by the people who are meant to accept me no matter what. I always felt disconnected to the concept of gender when I was little, only going along with the separation between boys and girls based on the biases my classmates and teachers showed. Even now, I find the whole thing a little silly. When I paint my nails, I do it because I like having colors on my fingers, not because it makes me more of a woman. When I leave my body hair unshaven, I do it because I find the whole thing a hassle, not because it makes me a man. At the moment, I feel the labels genderqueer and nonbinary are the best fit for me, although I try not to let the specific words keep me tied down. Gender is more of a show than an innate piece of my sense of self. Writing is a medium that helps me process my thoughts on reality and the way I experience it. I think my diction always comes off as more formal than I actually am, because I like to be more thorough when I explain things in prose. With words, I can become something more than my body. I can shape ideas. Here, in this essay, I'm telling you a small piece of who I am and how I experience the world. I want to pursue more writing in the future, even if it may not become my career path, because I hope I can put down my experiences in words that reach out to the reader and grab them in some way, whether it be by learning a new perspective or finding their own life reflected back at them.