My “awkward” thing would be any kind of hyper fixation I had. I was big on reading however. I didn’t read the basic books like Harry Potter though, I tended to get annoyed over how popular they were. Instead I would get more into things such as manga or even at one point the Percy Jackson series. As a young kid reading was always seen as weird and boring. With the most common thing to do tired anyone who read was call them a nerd. As a kid that had major anxiety being pointed out for being different was a huge struggle and made me feel as if I wasn’t truly part of my class. I would stop reading during school time or in public for years. I struggled with anything that I truly enjoyed because it was weird or cringy. It wasn’t until 7th grade when I started to bring books to school again, this was right after the pandemic, everyone came back and. Instantly got close. I sat in a little corner and would read my books. Same as before I was pointed out and called weird by others. This time they would bring my style in too. Saying. I wanted to be the main character of a book. Point out how little types of outfits I had meaning I absolutely had to be trying to look like my favorite character, because that’s how it works. It wasn’t until high school before it started to simmer down, of course I couldn’t read in class without others interrupting, asking what I was reading, why I would read childish things, mention how weird I was for enjoying the. Kinds of books I would read. Always. Giving a constant reminder on why I originally stoped reading in the first place. At times I felt like I wanted to give up. On reading again, but then I would read a chapter of a book. One chapter turned into two, two turned into five. The next thing zi would know. I finished my entire book and needed to find the next book to read. I would find more manga and people who. Also enjoyed reading similar stuff my age if not older. For the first time in years I would actually feel like I was actually part of a group. I could talk about what happened in a book, talk about how stupid the antagonist was, how sloppy the art was on the cover, how in accurate the fan art was of characters. For the first time my “awkward” thing was just a natural thing that half the population does in their free tie but was pointed out because of movie stereotypes. In conclusion, my awkward thing was my hyper-fixation on the different kinds of things that I would read and reading itself.

Mental health is heavily important to me because of the many challenged others have faced, even if they were offered a sort of help. Many people struggle everyday, and within that group many also take their own life. In my personal life everyone around me has struggled with mental health at least once in their life. Therefore, I have seen the struggle and experienced it myself. I use these experiences to aid my own advocacy. Most of my advocacy happened in high school. This is mainly because throughout all of my school years leading to High school I struggled with mental health. I felt uncomfortable to even speak out about the topic. However, once I got to high school I gained confidence to speak up. I started by mentioning it in my school assignments. Eventually I would talk about it outside of class work. I would have discussions in clubs, in cafes, even with family when they came to visit. I would discuss how negatively others affected others mental health by not supporting them through their struggles. How others would create jokes about things such as depression and suicide. Causing others to feel as if their own health meant nothing to others, and that they were nothing but a pawn for people to use to create new jokes. I have persoannaly met someone who struggled with this kind of feeling. My own best friend once admitted that she had always thought that no one would even notice if she took her life because she was nothing but a play thing to others. Since that day I have never felt so irritated at the people who joke about these kinds of things. As well, since that day my mind has been more open. I noticed many more people who struggled with the same struggles as my best friend. People who felt as if no one would notice their disappearance. My heart always ached for those who felt this way, So I focused more on trying to speak out for them. To bring them more help, with a mix of me talking about it in online discussions, in group chats or in public. I was always working hard to get and give help to those who needed it. I started letting others come to me with problems if they felt so alone. I became someone who I would offer a shoulder and a home that others could stay at if they started struggleing too much. I always dreamt of being someone that others could trust their life with. Part of being that kind of person means I also need to be someone who can talk about these struggles in the public, and not shy away from what others need from a person. Over the last few years I have made sure that no matter what I will always speak out and support those that are struggling with mental health and that I will always be someone who anyone can trust to talk to or even sit with them in silence for a bit oof comfort.

A time that I helped someone could be with my best friend. We have a very close relationships, though of coarse we both have our personal problems. And realistically I didn't even know I was helping her. It wasn't until days after that she mentioned how if it wasn't for me she would have taken her own life. This was of course one of he hardest things I've ever had to hear. The idea of my best friend taking her own life is heartbreaking. However she hadn't done it. Instead she messaged me. Not about her feelings but about a random thing we both had an interest in. The message led to a call. I was goofing around and acting normal. I would tell her that I had things I could give her at school. We would send memes and laugh about stupid head-canons we made about our favorite characters. About three days later is when she opend up and told me the truth. She told me about how if I wasn't there for her to see everyday at school, or be a phone call away to goof around she wouldn't be there. She explained, "I genuinely don't know where I would be without you. You're like the whole reason I want to live another day." At the time I didn't know how to handle this. I felt my heart break. I wanted to cry, but at the same time I was so grateful that I was able to prevent the act from happening. I told her how much I cared and loved her. I told her that no matter the situation I would always be there to help her. At this point I was hugging her. I was crying, but I didn't care. I was just happy that I was still able to even say hello to my best friend. I still remember the call, we were talking about the Percy Jackson books. I did notice that she sounded almost tired but I figured it was just due to her having a messed up sleep schedule. As she usually got little amounts of sleep. Not once did I think that she was having terrible intrusive thoughts. However, I would never change what I did that day. I would still talk about my obsession of Will Solace, Tell her that I was going to bring her a surprise the following day, play Minecraft with her, destroying the villages by taking the doors. I wouldn't take one thing back. I would do it all over again even if I did know that's what she was thinking. I know how well distracting can help. In conclusion, a time I helped or as I like ti say, Save someone was with my own best friend. She was having awful intrusive thoughts and without me knowing I was one of the people that convinced her to not act on those thoughts.

My experience has shaped me as a person greatly. Mental illnesses runs greatly in my family. From me having Anxiety, depression, and a sort of eating disorder. To my family members having ADHD, suicidal tenancies, Anxiety, ext. This has greatly impacted me in many different ways. Many I have shaped to have a positive outcome Goals that I have shaped due to this are things as little as learning to cope in positive ways to something as large as create awareness for various mental health situations. I greatly want to create awareness so that those that are struggling can be seen and they have get help for those kinds of struggles of what they may have. This desire has grown from seeing my brothers and cousins struggle in school because the school doesn't understand the mental illness they have. As my cousin has been in 3 different schools within the last year because the schools has started to unknowingly encourage the things we are using therapy and other positive resources to dis encourage. I also would like to be able to learn new coping skills not only for myself but for the sake that if someone else may need my help I can be aware of various methods to help someone through their hard time. As most of my goals are created because of the various struggles my family has been put through because of mental health. These struggles vary from not being able to read or write correctly because of various things, this would cause people like my father to not be able to correctly do taxes and struggle to reach out for help because of other issues such as his stutter. This would make many people take advantage because he wouldn't be able to fact check on his own. One things that I have quickly learned for relationships is that mental health is a big factor to how well the relationship goes. As because I have Anxiety I would constantly struggle in relationships and tend to feel left out or over think problems and eventually I would put distance between me and the other party. Though I have gotten better this is still a problem for many that I have created goals to work on to improve many relationships. I also use 'failed' relationships as a learning possibility on the things that dragged me down and was the failing factors, usually a cause of mental health that could have been worked on if there was awareness. Finally, my understanding of the world has changed drastically the more I learn about mental Health. As everyday I learn a new struggle someone has, whether I learn it from something my brother is struggling with or from my own experience of situations with things I dont open up with. This has made me more empathetic to others, and has created many goals. If I were not to understand mental health I believe that I would not be able to be much of a good person. As in my family I have had family members commit suicide. This has opened my eyes to how many people struggle alone and as a result I want to be someone those people can turn to when they are fighting alone so that I can see a smile on their face, and I can help them move forward instead of ending their final chapter. In conclusion, I have learned many things because of mental heath. With various struggles my family has had to situations I struggle with. Many of these 'problems' have ended with me having a new look and feeling about things. In many ways I want to bring awareness to these various situations.

The teacher that has deeply influenced me would be my sophomore and senior year English teacher. She is one of the people that just knew how to work with me without pushing me too far. She overall knew just how to work with kids and young adults of all kinds. One of the things that she made sure to help students with any kind of issue. She would notice if me or any of my classmates were having a bad day, a hard week, even if they seem to be slower at schoolwork. There was a time that I was having a hard time at home. She was one of the first people to notice. She pulled me aside and told me that if I needed any help with any of the work for that day, I could go and ask for any assistant. Despite me being a senior and other teachers telling me that having bad days is part of the adult life and I just have to suck it up sometimes. She was willing to reach out and give me space to take a breather and ask for help. She knew that I had many struggles to reach out first for any sort of help so she would constantly work with me to find accommodations. And if she felt that they didn't do much to help me she would tell me what she thought to my face. Since she was bluntly honest it prepared me for the times that people would do this in the future. It also had prepared me to not have as large of expectations. Due to her being able to change plans quickly she would quickly shut down expectations. Other times she would ask a question searching for an answer that no one would expect her to be looking for. This caused me to not only stop having such high expectations but to also feel more confident with taking a guess when it comes to things I'm not entirely sure with. At first, it was her questions then it slowly started to be me speaking up for myself and others. If I had a question, I wasn't as scared to just wait for someone else to say it, but I could finally speak up and ask in front of the class so that I could have a better understanding for myself. In conclusion, My Sophomore and Senior ELA teacher is the teacher that has impacted me the most and changed my approach to life. If I had never met this teacher, I believe that I still would be the same girl I was at the beginning of high school, awkward and anxious.

A movie that has left a great impact on my life would be 'Journey 2: the mysterious island' This movie has impacted me ever since I was a kid. It was one of the first movies I wanted to watch again and again. It gave me many valuable life lessons, many of which I still use 12 years later. Watching the main character, Sean, and his father figure, Hank, start off with having a strained relationship. And throughout the movie slowly grow a bond with one another. I find this inspiring. It has pushed me forward to one day be able to take a strained relationship of my own and build it into something strong. It also has showed me others going through a strange or difficult issue that simply listening to someone else that may know what they're doing can help more. providing some solutions that I use constantly to help myself through difficult decisions. This movie was one of the first introductions to unhealthy vs. healthy communication. As in the beginning Sean and his father would unhealthily communicate. Usually hiding things, sneaking around, give consequences without explaining why. However, as the movie progresses they start to learn how to communicate in a healthy manner. To express why they feel upset, to explain why they wanted to do something the other disagreed with. It shows that even if you have a strained bond with another person you can still work. It shows both men putting in work to have a healthy relationship. This demonstrates that relationships dont work when only half of it is putting in effort the relationship wont work. This is even shown in the movie. With Hank first starting to reach out and try to make the relationship better but Sean not yet ready to work with him. It shows the conflict that this will cause. The watcher sees the problem and may start yelling at the TV to stop being stupid and to help. Just showing how it can point things out. Despite all of this my by-far favorite part is the end when everyone is at home for a Christmas party. Sean is about to open his Christmas presents when his grandfather shows up right when Sean started to loose hope of him ever showing up. It then that he gets a book from his father. shadowing the beginning of Sean and his father finding a map made out of book pages. though this one seems to be more direct. Offering enough creative liberty but an understanding for the watcher of what Sean and those in his family may do next once they are ready for a new adventure. In conclusion, the movie 'Journey 2: The Mysterious Island' has had a great impact on me for many years now. It has given me things to work with in tough times to small details like what healthy relationships look like. With my favorite part of the movie being the very end.

Mr Terry's story inspires me in ways that are almost in-explainable. His story shows me that there are still good people like me in this world that no matter the hardships they dont stop reaching for there goal. They are willing to break through any boulder if it means they can get the life they want. How he pushed to learn even with his large disadvantage of not even knowing English. Yet Mr. Terry still became someone so wonderful and knowing, from being part of the US Army, to completing high school and collage with only a Elementary level of knowledge. It makes me strive to be far better than I am. To pick out all of my struggles I may experience on a daily and find ways to push through them instead of constantly working around my problems. I strive to maybe even be able to work alongside the difficulties the world throws at me. With this I dream of one day being able to publish my own book with the help of my degree. Not an autobiography, instead just a normal book, using the many things I will learn in collage to support me pushing out my story. However, I want use problems real people struggle with,to help others see that they are not alone. I want to have my characters work with the problems. To feel content with the problems and accept them, I hope that one day my book can reach someone, to show someone that just because they have a issue, or 'illness' that doesn't mean they should give up. I want to bring across to any reader, whether a 16 year old that's bored and picked up a random book, or a 76 year old that wanted to see what the young were into, I want anyone to feel heard and believe that even if they think there time is almost up they can still be part of the group that wants to make a change. If its something as big as bringing awareness to mental illnesses, or as small as a shortage of milk. I want to be part of a change myself. To stop people from feeling insecure because they are different. For the children with anxiety to not wish they were 'normal' or adults. However, I also dont want to be part of 'mental illnesses are trendy.' I want to point out a true struggle people have. I want people to have confidence even with there illness. But I dont want to be the reason people brag about their illness. I believe that with my book I can show my characters coming to terms with any struggle they have. But I know that I will not show them using there illness as an excuse to do something. They can't just skip out of shopping because of social anxiety, instead they find personal accommodations, weather its bringing a friend to help explain there point across or doing a pick-up order. I wish that with my collage degree I can correctly use terms, and know how to correctly reach out to the average audience. To use my degree to create a story. to help others gain the confidence they deserve.

My personal experience with finances is indeed hard. With my family being considered a low income household with 11 people living in the house in total it can make drastic difficulties. As a starter everyone is constantly needing something for education or other needs. Though this has been difficult for my parents to find a way to get this to work through to get us basic needs such as getting soap, or getting the correct school supplies. This not only makes it hard to correctly complete my school work, This can have drive anxiety high. I was diagnosed with heighten anxiety when I was in 5th grade. With this came all of the worries, with the fact that I'm not from a wealthy family sitting right on top. I would see other students have the ability to do so many things. They could go hang out with their friends, do multiple sports, buy good hair product. Get new clothes. Everything was something I didn't have. And naturally as children do, they would bully. Due to the lack of money to get something as simple as soap I couldn't shower as often as I would need to. Rumors would spread that I didn't like showering, or I would shower every two weeks. This was of course not the case. I would shower as much as I can, I couldn't use correct products. Denying the rumors made me look stupid too. They would laugh at me, mock me, push me to the point of crying. Then laugh more. The school didn't offer much help. It was the substitutes that would step in the most to stop things from being said. Showers wasn't the only challenge however, I would be cooped up with little to nothing to do. I would complete all my school work. I couldn't go on the TV, I would try to play with my siblings but game started to become boring quickly. We would ask to go places, maybe the park, maybe a swimming pool. But we were constantly turned down. Our parents were too focused on not loosing the house. Taking me and my siblings was the last of their worries. We would have broken toys that we play with. However, with these challenges I have learned plenty. One thing that I believe that I have learned well is my patience. With having multiple siblings and not much time given to me I have become more than capable of waiting or not putting myself first. Instead I look out on how I could help anyone else, If theirs something that matters more than my own feelings and what it is. I have also learned to be grateful for what I have. There are many things that I want in life, however I also know that many people work just as hard is not harder than I do to get the things that I want. In conclusion, I grew up with a difficult life, but it taught me how to be patient and empathetic.

One of my biggest struggles in life was my identity. I grew up in a heavy republic area. And many people were of some type of religion as well. This caused many Queer people to try to stay hidden or under the radar. I from a young age would show signs of being queer mainly with my attraction to women. Though my family would try to "fix" me before it was to late. They would sty up late talking to me and trying to convince me I would find a man. They would say "Marrying a man s the only way you could possibly get anywhere in life." This caused many insecurities that I would deal with alone for years onward. When I first came out, my family was in denial. My father said I was only learning things from the internet. That I wanted to be part of a trend. My mother would tell me that if I didn't get my act together unless I wish to go to hell. But my feelings stayed. I found everyone attractive. But my family couldn't accept that. My school wouldn't be much better either. They would poke fun at me, constantly assuming if I was dating someone I spoke to. At one point they would start saying that I must like little kids if I'm queer. They would threaten to tell the principal. Now it doesn't seem to be too bad, but to a 7th grader it can be a lot. I felt that I was constantly wrong, until I found places I could write. It felt like a better version of journalism. I could create my own worlds, create my own work. I could show the pain that others can relate to, I could relate to others through stories and show them how they can grow to something more. I know I can get true criticism on how my work is, I can get my mistakes brought up for me to try to fix in the future. However, I can show what I'm passionate about. I can create romance between whoever I want without being limited to what I can create and express. There's no topic I have to follow, I dont have to worry that I have to make it perfect for a grade. It would be something I get to make up. I inspire to be able to be the reason someone gains there own confidence one day. That maybe they can read something I have written, see the growth of my characters and want to get that growth too and push forward with the new motivation