People are the very reason why I chose to major in Industrial Engineering and Management. As someone with a disability, I have a whole different lens that I look at the world through. I see and understand things that others may not. Personally, I believe that this gives me a bit of an advantage in being an upstanding engineer. I had an amazing internship last summer where I had the opportunity to work with a group of some great guys. They were all nearing retirement, some with less mobility than others, and I had to ensure that I kept them in the forefront of my mind with the changes I was making. I improved existing processes, as well as implemented new ones. And when I made these changes, my main concern was ergonomics, accessibility of those in the impacted areas, and safety. I want to continue to put the people I work with at the forefront of my mind, whether I'm aware of their disability or not. Additionally, I hope to be able to continue to improve different processes, using the lens that I have as a tool, rather than treating my disability as if it is only a burden.

I remember losing consciousness for the first time at age 11. It was a hot summer morning in Minnesota, and I was playing mini golf with my brothers. An otherwise insignificant day. Unbeknownst to me at the time, it was only the first day of my never-ending medical journey. For the next 5 years, I spent hours with my parents in vehicles, waiting rooms, and at appointments. While I look back on those years, plagued with pain and frustration, I'm also extremely grateful for the opportunity that I had to spend one-on-one time with my parents. My dad was one of my role models growing up. I remember one of the days that I had to stay home from school, due to my illness, and we had to get his computer from his work. I got to be his little shadow, as we bobbed and weaved through the production floor, heading towards his office. We stopped and talked to anyone we came across, and I watched as my father interacted with them. While I had no clue what half the words meant, I was fascinated by the idea of how all these machines, the people running them, and the parts, turned into full-blown playgrounds, that I still loved to play on. That was when, for the first time in what felt like ages, that something in me was truly excited about something. After many dead ends in my medical journey, all the unknowns, it felt good to be certain about something: I was going to become an engineer just like my dad. I continue to hold onto this dream, as I am a 3rd year student at North Dakota State University, majoring in Industrial Engineering and Management. I know that little girl I was 10 years ago, would be so proud of how far I have come since then, in both my medical journey and my education/career. In a small town in Minnesota, there is not much exposure to the various different career paths that are out there. I can confidently say that I would not be studying to be an engineer if my father wasn't one. Without even meaning to, he had inspired my career path. I think that there needs to be more programs, events, classes, guest speakers, etc. in middle and high schools. There are many kids out there that would be a perfect fit in a STEM-related field, if only they knew more about it. I'm involved in an organization on campus, Society of Women Engineers, and they've hosted events that get local kids involved in STEM-related activities. It's a great way to at least open the door for these kids, getting their minds curious. I would like to continue to reach out to kids of all ages, at least give them the opportunity that I had. I want them to know how cool and even fun it can be to problem solve, think outside of the box, and that it is good to be inquisitive and curious. I have also tried to foster this idea when I was a teaching aide, as well as a teacher, doing science experiments, and other similar activites with the children. This scholarship would help me on my journey to becoming an engineer. I would be able to focus on other important things in my life, such as those events that give back to my community. Everybody has their own story, and I am not more or less deserving of receiving this scholarship. But, what I can say for certain is that I would be extremely grateful.

What a great honor it would be to say that I have served our country. Unfortunately, that is not something that I can say that I have done, am doing, or will do. This is due to my debilitating medical condition, which I was diagnosed with years ago. However, this does not stop me from lending a hand when I can, and still doing my part. Donating handwritten letters and postcards, bears, paracord bracelets, etc. to Operation Gratitude, is one of the ways I try to support our brave men and women. My oldest brother, Zack, decided to join the marines on a whim. I was skeptical at the time, as this seemed so out of the blue. Nonetheless, he left us in December of 2018 to go to bootcamp. I will never forget that call we got from him, him yelling into the phone, stumbling over his words, letting us know that he had arrived safely. He is a natural leader, someone who doesn't even have to try to demand respect from others when he wants it. So, it came to no surprise to me or my family, when he received promotion after promotion. From struggling in his first semester at college, to thriving as a natural leader in the marines, he really turned his life around. My family and I are always proud of his accomplishments, and are his biggest cheerleaders, even if we are on the other side of the country. I graduated high school back in May of 2021, with my AA degree from a local university, and decided to further my education at North Dakota State University, following in my father's footsteps. After my first semester, I was confident that I wanted to major in Industrial Engineering and Management. I learned fairly quickly that I loved the people-side of my career choice. In all the internships that I have had over the past couple years, that has always remained a constant for me. One of my educational goals is to continue to learn, be curious, and to ask questions. One thing my parents always said was to try and be like a sponge, soaking up as much information as possible. And that is what I am going to continue to do, as I navigate my way through the rest of my college career. I hope to see myself at a manufacturing plant, working as an industrial or manufacturing engineer. I want at least one of my top focuses in my role to be centered around process/production support. This would give me those interactions that I love, with the production associate's. I'm beyond excited to start my career, and am so glad to have this opportunity in the first place. It would not be at all possible without all the brave men and women who have fought, or are fighting, to protect the very ground that I walk on. And for that, no amount of gratitude or thanks is enough.

Do you still believe that there are monsters underneath your bed at night? Growing up, I remember being tucked in by both of my parents. A kiss goodnight was the last little bit of comfort before the bedroom door was shut, the darkness engulfing me in it's unsettling unknown. The monsters were not just underneath the bed, but in every shadow. Hiding and waiting. It's interesting just how real it felt when I was little: the pure terror that there was something in the closet or underneath the bed. And as I got older those monsters found a new home in me, in my head. Imagine the fear that I felt when I was convinced that there was something evil lurking only a few feet away. How frozen I must have felt, scared, fearful. Fast forward 16 years, and this still can happen. If I don't address those monsters, that same paralyzing feeling will overwhelm my senses, the same way it did when I was a kid. I cannot begin to describe the importance of addressing those monsters. In the times that I sideline my mental health, my grades start to fall, relationships suffer, procrastination increases, basic tasks become a chore, and I forget to live. Growing up with brothers, I played a lot of football in our backyard. And if there is one thing that I have learned from those games, other than that I was the best punter, is that I do not like to lose. And I have started to look at my mental health from the perspective that if I let those monsters in my head win, I lose. While this is still a very much ongoing process of trying to figure out the right balance of maintaining my mental wellbeing, there are a handful of things that have increased the overall quality of my life. Replacing my screen time on my phone, with a physical book. Allowing myself to feel my emotions rather than bottling them up inside, until they explode out of me. Drinking more water, journaling, going for walks, reading my Bible, are a few of the other things that I have tried to implement in my life to ensure that I am able to more easily maintain my mental wellness. In my opinion, the most important thing that I have done, is give myself more grace. The person who is the hardest on you, is oftentimes you. So, be kind to yourself, let yourself be human and make mistakes. Give grace to yourself, and others. We all have different stories that have lead us to our current chapter, and there is no linear path to life. Everyone has their own story, and is battling with their own monsters. Be kind to yourself, and to your monsters.

Perspective. I have it tattooed on my ribcage. And, yes, it did hurt. Perspective is the first word that comes to mind when asked how my experience living with an autoimmune disease has shaped who I am. Everything is shaped by perspectives. It is such a simple word, yet beautifully complex meaning. 5 years, countless tears, and even more doctors, is how long it took me to be diagnosed. From the age of 11, I started to pass out, my body felt as if it was in slow-mo compared to my friends, and I never had enough energy to get through mundane tasks. It was at age 15, only a few weeks before my 16th birthday, when I was told "I believe you" by a doctor. A day that I will never be able to forget. I felt like I had been racing to get to the finish line with this never-ending journey of a diagnosis, that it felt bittersweet to finally have an answer. I felt anger towards myself for ever doubting what I knew to be true; that something was off. I felt relief that I could finally better understand what my body was feeling, and why. But most importantly, I felt proud. Proud that I stood up for myself at 11 years old, when adults were questioning the validity of my words. Perspective. I could look at what I went through for those 5 years, and think about how I was looked down upon by many doctors, told that it was nothing, invalidated, and scared. I could focus on the things that I missed out on due to doctor appointments, the episodic nature of my unknown condition at the time, or the lack of confidence that was being instilled in me. Or... I could look at what I went through for those 5 years, and think about how I had parents who supported and believed in me, the doctor who said "I believe you" and changed my entire life, my brother who would try to cheer my up after a hard day of no answers, or the perseverance that was embedded in me, too deep for anyone to rip from me. My stubbornness, courtesy of my dad, also helped. My autoimmune disease does not make me who I am, it does not define me, it is not me. But it has helped to shape me into a woman who, while has had quite the uphill journey, does not plan on stopping because of her autoimmune disease. In fact, it only fuels the fire within me. I am not ashamed of my disability, I am proud. Proud of what I have accomplished with it, and proud of what I can accomplish because of the lessons that it has taught me. The tattoo on my ribcage is a daily reminder of my strength and perseverance. Seeing life through a different lens. Looking at things with a differing perspective, seeing the good within the bad.

My freshman year of college is what I consider to be my personal "necessary evil". It helped turn me into the person that I am today. Let me set the scene; I was diagnosed at 16 years old with an "invisible illness" as my mother likes to put it. Meaning that an outsider would not be able to look at you, and tell that you are "sick". Moving away from home was a testament to my ability, or lack thereof, to self advocate for myself. I quickly learned that living without 5+ different people who were always willing to help me with whatever I needed, was a lot more difficult than I had anticipated. I had never realized how much I relied on my family, especially my mother, to help me through my daily life. Bringing in groceries, turning door knobs or carrying things, etc. Halfway through my first semester, and I am struggling. Bad. I have the lowest grades I have ever had, my overall drive to do things that I typically enjoy, is low, my energy level is at rock bottom, and I am just skating by. Fast forward to the end of my first semester at college, I failed a class. Something has to change. I am struggling to be able to make it to some of my classes, due to physical limitations. The demands of some of the professors is too great for me to consistently achieve. So something needs to give, and I can not let it be my grades once again. Christmas break gave me a lot of time to reflect, to talk with my parents, and to better understand my priorities. My first priority was my own health, both mental and physical. Second was school, third was family. Doing research and talking to my specialist, helped lay the foundation for my action plan. My university offered accommodations to students with disabilities. For example, taking tests in different rooms, flexible assignment dates, etc. I met one-on-one with someone in this department, and they helped to write out my plan. I was putting myself first, and it felt great. The impact that simply self-advocating for myself, is something that I cannot even properly put into words. I struggled to admit to myself that I have a disability, but now I am proud of it. Not because it defines me, but because it is apart of who I am, and I have no reason to be ashamed of that.

How are students supposed to feel encouraged about pursuing a degree that they know next to nothing about? From a young age, we are all asked what we want to be when we grow up. Some say a policeman, while others say a firefighter. And, for most of us, as we get older and older, that changes. Then suddenly we are 17 or 18 years old, a senior in high school, and we are expected to know exactly what we want to do with the rest of our lives. Chances are, that most of us would be best suited to a career that we know nothing about. That would have been the case for me if it had not been for my father. Thankfully, from a young age, I was exposed to what an engineer could design, how they can lead, and how exciting problem-solving looked. I wanted to be just like my father, who is an engineer. I grew up in a smaller town with a population of just under 5,000. A town that if you are driving by and blink a few times, you would miss it. We had the basic classes: math, science, language arts, band/choir, art, and phy-ed. High school broadened the scope of classes, by introducing more variety. Welding, Spanish, robotics, and drama were the extent of the 'variety' offered. Fast-forward a few years, and I am chatting with some college friends about their high schools. Come to find out that the reason why they are majoring in engineering is that they enjoyed some of the STEM-based classes that they took back in high school. I was shocked, as I did not know that high schools offered these kinds of courses. It got me thinking about how the level of exposure to engineering classes in rural towns is next to none. Now, I know that the movement to include more STEM-based courses in high school has taken some big strides in the past few years. However, there is still much work that needs to be done. Let me reiterate the question I asked in the beginning: How are students supposed to feel encouraged about pursuing a degree that they know next to nothing about? We aren't is the simple answer. Instead of asking us 'what would help encourage science education for yourself and others like you' we should be asked 'what are your ideas about how we can be exposing more kids at a younger age to a STEM-based education' or 'how can we increase the knowledge of future options to those in high school?' We could help generate ideas so that the kids of the future will be given more of an opportunity/chance to love engineering as much as I do.