Have you ever been on a roller coaster? As it climbs your heart races, hands sweat, and stomach prepares to drop. As the roller coaster slowly climbs to the top you look down and see the world below getting smaller and smaller. Anticipation rises as you get closer to the peak. My mind starts wondering - why did I do this? Am I going to be ok? I think I might throw up! The anxiety is killing me!
My whole life I have dealt with anxiety, depression and ADD. When I try to describe how I feel, the best analogy I can think of is that it feels like a roller coaster ride where I’m ascending to the top, but never get to experience the relief and release of the drop. I never get to head back down, where the world is “normal” size, and my heart returns to a typical beat, my palms are dry again, and my stomach can handle food again. This is a recurring dream I’ve had time and time again.
While I don’t have obvious physical limitations, these mental challenges have been strong issues that I’ve had to learn to cope with, and overcome. I’ve constantly dealt with fears of trying new things, making new friends, being confident in any situation, and trusting that I’m “good enough” to get through difficult situations. I struggle to focus at times, and as I fall behind I start getting anxious that I will never get through something. While this has been extremely difficult to overcome, I’ve done my best to learn to cope with my challenges - mostly through the support of those I can trust.
In the roller coaster dream, my saving grace is when I look over and see my friend sitting beside me. And then I turn and see my family sitting behind me. It’s then that I realize that I am not going through this alone. I have support, and I can get through it. It has not always been easy, and I’ve had to lean on those that I trust to help me learn how to cope with these situations. And while I understand that I will likely struggle with these emotions my entire life, I’m learning that I can get through them. It’s this feeling that I want to share with others - specifically children - so they too can learn how to deal with these challenges, and know that they are not alone.
I want to pursue a career that helps children with similar obstacles that I have faced. It is a passion of mine to make sure they know they are not alone, and can overcome anything in life - especially through the help of others. For this reason, I’ve chosen to attend Northwestern University in St. Paul, MN, where I plan on majoring in either Art Therapy or Psychology. I believe in either of these fields I will be able to pursue my passions, while helping children reach their full potential in healthy environments. I believe I will be able to connect with them on a unique level, having dealt with my own challenges in life. It is for this reason I’m requesting your consideration for this scholarship. Thank you for your time and consideration.