Being a student and a parent is one of the most difficult things I have done in my entire life. As a student parent, I face many financial, psychological, and emotional stressors of being a college student while providing for my family at the same time. My journey comes with many highs and many lows. My entire parenting experience has solely been that of a single parent. This is not the circumstance I wanted, but it is my circumstance nonetheless and I fully accept the responsibility because I love my children and want better for them.
I have 2 children: my 6-year-old Autistic son and my 7-month daughter. As a single mother, I am a provider, nurturer, protector, mentor, therapist, assistant, accountant, teacher, housekeeper, chef, doctor, and more - and still, I am a student. I have a household of 3, consisting of just myself and my kids, which means that I solely bear all of the responsibility of maintaining our home life. Regardless of my emotional, physical, or medical state, I cannot take a day off. After a day of work and school, I still cook dinner, wash dishes, bathe children, assist with homework, do laundry, clean up messes, change diapers, and more. There is nobody to help me. Through blood, sweat, and tears, I handle it all.
We are a low-income household. Although I work, much of my time is dedicated to my schooling, making me less available to earn wages. Getting my education requires sacrifice along the way, resulting in my household financially struggling on a regular basis. With no financial support from my children’s paternal side, I solely bear the financial burden. I am accustomed to this by now, but it doesn’t make it any easier. I’ve just gotten better at adapting. I tap into community outreach services and resources when I can, and I’ve recently considered couponing to reduce money spent on groceries.
Despite all I’ve described, the most challenging factor about the combination of being a student and a single parent is my lack of a family support network. I don’t have ties that are commonly had amongst families. I come from a broken childhood upbringing. I do not have a mother or father and I was not raised amongst my siblings. I have minimal communication with extended family members, seeing a few of them mainly for holidays. This means that my children don’t have grandparents, aunts, uncles, or relatives that are commonly involved. “It takes a village to raise a child,” is a common phrase and belief. Yet, I cannot provide a village for myself and my children. This is, by far, the most challenging and heartbreaking aspect of my single parenthood. I feel the struggle every single moment of my life. I don’t get the luxury of sending my children to grandma’s house for the weekend, or them going shopping with an aunt for the afternoon, or having relatives attend our school and sports events. 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year, I am mothering - all alone.
All of these factors directly affect my educational experience. I schedule work and college around my children’s school and daycare schedules, which is incredibly difficult. My routine homework hours begin at 9 pm and end as late as 2 am. Then my alarm wakes me up at 6 am to start my day. I cook dinner while listening to class lecture videos. I’ve had to bring my children to class, workshops, and academic appointments so that I don’t get behind. Sometimes I am easily frustrated. I yell and I cry. Afterward, I feel terrible and apologize for being a mean mom. Then I get up every day and do this entire exhausting cycle all over again.
Although I am stressed, I am also blessed. Single motherhood has been challenging but I have learned more about myself along the way. It has taught me to be a better mother. Motherhood is the driving force behind my pursuit of higher education. It ignited a fire inside of me, calling for me to tap into my potential. So that is exactly what I chose to do. Research shows that parents' education level has a significant impact on their children's success. By witnessing me in college, my children will have a greater influence to pursue college themselves.
Being awarded this scholarship will pave the way for my future and the future of my children. I understand the value of higher education and personal achievement. My education is going to be the gateway out of economic duress. However, college has become increasingly unaffordable over the years. If awarded, I would strictly use the funds for my educational costs. This would include tuition, fees, parking, transportation, club memberships, books and supplies, and so much more. This would provide me with the financial assistance I need rather than the alternative route of charging my credit card, resulting in me paying high-interest rates. Additionally, not only would this scholarship have a great financial impact on my family, but it would also provide an even greater benefit for me personally. Winning this award would be a great boost in my self-confidence and would be an affirmation that I do belong. It would be a demonstration to myself that my efforts are not in vain and are not going unnoticed. Maybe some of the personal struggles of my single parenthood journey are blossoming in the form of recognition that I am doing something right in my life.
As a student and single parent, I am making sacrifices to make a better future for my family. I am setting an example for them that it’s never too late to go for our dreams. When I graduate, I will have the 2 most influential people in my life in attendance: my son and my daughter. And I would be honored to say that the Organic Formula Shop Single Parenthood Scholarship has had a role in my success.