In 2020, the world watched as my hometown Minneapolis stood up in protest against police brutality in the wake of the murder of George Floyd. My best friend Chad was a young Black man who, like most young Black men, had a history with law enforcement, particularly in Minneapolis and Maricopa County, Arizona, home of the infamous "Tent City," jail. Within two weeks of the death of George Floyd, Chad was also dead. He suffered from delusions and paranoia and we were told he jumped out of a second story window and died. In the chaos of the uprising in those two weeks, I did not check on my friend to see how he was doing, and before I knew it, I would never have that chance. My mental health has also been very difficult, due to childhood bullying and abuse, I have been diagnosed with complex PTSD and borderline personality disorder. I fight every day of my life to keep my mental health functioning in a way that keeps moving my life forward. I am going into counseling because I want to help people recover from their trauma before it causes them to do things that harm themselves and others. The skills I am learning to help others are also changing my life and that gives me even more hope that I can someday fight for people like me and Chad to have another chance at life.

I am going into the field of addictions counseling because I have survived addiction myself, and I want to give others the hope for a better life that I found through recovery. I drank every day for over ten years beginning in my undergraduate years and it took away everything from me including my hope for a better future. Through recovery and with the help of my counselors, I have been able to achieve a higher level of executive function and put together a new life where I can help others find the same opportunities. I plan to work as a counselor in an addictions treatment center setting to begin with, helping both voluntary and non-voluntary court-ordered clients to achieve sobriety and mental wellness.

My favorite Spider-Man actor is Tom Holland. The reason is Tom's advocacy work on behalf of alcoholics and individuals with substance use disorder. Tom has made positive statements in the past in regards to his own abstinence from alcohol and starred in the movie Cherry, which followed the story of a young veteran struggling with substance use disorder (SUD). He always has such a positive spin in interviews and seems like. a respectful and honorable man. Zendaya is also a very powerful presence, and her love for Tom speaks highly of him. Tom's Peter Parker is an inspirational Spider-Man because he really makes you feel the loss this character has suffered, and his most important super power is his resilience. This Peter had lost both parents and his Uncle Ben before we ever met him. Aunt May's death scene in No Way Home was so powerful because I could really feel that Peter was losing the only family that he had left. His relationship with Tony Stark also added a lot to the character. In the comics, Peter has had several scientific mentors over the years, but most ended up turning into villains. Tony gave Peter a role model that he continues to try to live up to and Tony lives on in Peter's work.

For most of my life, I struggled with obsessive suicidal ideation from severe depression and anxiety since enduring a series of traumatic events in my childhood. I developed Alcohol Use Disorder in my early adulthood, from which I have now been in remission since 2018 with the help of my counselors and community. Thanks to the clarity my recovery has provided, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder by my long-term therapist, and with C-PTSD and ADHD by a neuropsychologist. The toll has been heavy on all of my relationships, particularly with my family, but currently, I am four-and-a-half years from my last drink and through diligent effort in my mental health and spiritual recovery, I have been able to repair those relationships. Soon after I completed my undergraduate degree in English, I was introduced to Alcoholics Anonymous by friends who saw themselves and their recovery in my struggles. Since then, I have spent much of my time in leadership roles within the fellowship, which is where I began honing personal growth edges in conflict management and appropriate communication. In sponsoring other non-binary and male-identifying people, I have spent years in a volunteer peer support role, helping others with disordered alcohol use process their experience and spiritual growth. I believe the Integrated Behavioral Health program would provide me the training and knowledge in science-based tools and practices to expand this role, working in a wider community, with people of diverse needs.

For most of my life, I struggled with obsessive suicidal ideation from severe depression and anxiety since enduring a series of traumatic events in my childhood. I was treated for Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder, developing Alcohol Use Disorder in my early adulthood, from which I have now been in remission since 2018 with the help of my counselors and community. During the course of the COVID-19 pandemic, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder by my long-term therapist, and with complex-post-traumatic stress disorder and ADHD by a neuropsychologist. The toll has been heavy on all of my relationships, particularly with my family, but currently, I am four-and-a-half years from my last drink and through dilligent effort in my mental health and spiritual recovery, I have been able to repair those relationships. These new diagnoses more accurately correspond to the range of behavioral and identity-related symptoms that I have experienced since childhood.Prior to these diagnoses, I lost hope in treating my depression and anxiety. I received help from my therapists and mental health practitioners to endure my symptoms through that period, but struggled to reach the level of functioning I hoped was possible. After my new individualized diagnosis, I went through intensive outpatient DBT, which has rejuvenated my engagement with life and allowed me a capacity for executive function that I was operating without for many years. My experience with DBT has also reaffirmed my belief in the efficacy of mental health and behavioral therapy. Once my practitioners and I recognized my specific neurodiversity, treating my symptoms as parts of disorders, my quality of life increased exponentially. I continue to maintain my recovery through daily meditation practice, weekly therapy, and 12-step work. With these new tools and understanding of my past, I can think about my future in a new way. The recovery and relief I have experienced from proper and thorough treatment of my mental illness gives me hope that others can also recover, no matter how hopeless things may seem, and that I can be a lived-experience practitioner who helps people learn how to live their lives to their fullest potential. Having seen myself recover so much more than I previously thought possible, I want to continue my dedication to helping others recover from similar illnesses and disorders by joining the University of Minnesota’s Integrated Behavioral Health Masters of Professional Studies program. Soon after I completed my undergraduate degree in English, I was introduced to Alcoholics Anonymous by friends who saw themselves and their recovery in my struggles. Since then, I have spent much of my time in leadership roles within the fellowship, which is where I began honing personal growth edges in conflict management and appropriate communication. In sponsoring other non-binary and male-identifying people, I have spent years in a volunteer peer support role, helping others with disordered alcohol use process their experience and spiritual growth. I believe the Integrated Behavioral Health program would provide me the training and knowledge in science-based tools and practices to expand this role, working in a wider community, with people of diverse needs. As a queer, non-binary BIPOC individual who presents as white and assigned-male-at-birth, I have experienced how mental health care can be insufficient when people are put into categories rather than treated as individuals. My BPD, for example, was misdiagnosed for years because I was not treated as an individual or listened to when I tried to express my gender identity, or heard when I expressed how the antisemitism I’ve experienced has marginalized me. Working with caregivers who listen and understand me has changed my life, and everyone deserves the same opportunity. Psychology has provided me with a framework for my identity and the way I view the world, and I want to spend my life learning as much as I can about the working and healing of the human mind. I believe my personal experience and my professional skills, my empathy and compassion, and my passion for knowledge will make me an effective mental health and addictions counselor. Having spent many years finding the right therapists and following what then seemed like dead ends in my recovery, I understand some of the challenges mental health counselors face. I’ve persevered in both my chemical dependency recovery and performance art career for over a decade despite numerous setbacks and challenges, and I expect to do the same if presented with challenges as a counselor. I began my higher education at the University of Minnesota - Twin Cities and I feel returning as a graduate student would provide me with another solid foundation to build the next part of my career.

For most of my life, I struggled with obsessive suicidal ideation from severe depression and anxiety since enduring a series of traumatic events in my childhood. I was treated for Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder, developing Alcohol Use Disorder in my early adulthood, from which I have now been in remission since 2018 with the help of my counselors and community. During the course of the COVID-19 pandemic, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder by my long-term therapist, and with complex-post-traumatic stress disorder and ADHD by a neuropsychologist. The toll has been heavy on all of my relationships, particularly with my family, but currently, I am four-and-a-half years from my last drink and through dilligent effort in my mental health and spiritual recovery, I have been able to repair those relationships. These new diagnoses more accurately correspond to the range of behavioral and identity-related symptoms that I have experienced since childhood.Prior to these diagnoses, I lost hope in treating my depression and anxiety. I received help from my therapists and mental health practitioners to endure my symptoms through that period, but struggled to reach the level of functioning I hoped was possible. After my new individualized diagnosis, I went through intensive outpatient DBT, which has rejuvenated my engagement with life and allowed me a capacity for executive function that I was operating without for many years. My experience with DBT has also reaffirmed my belief in the efficacy of mental health and behavioral therapy. Once my practitioners and I recognized my specific neurodiversity, treating my symptoms as parts of disorders, my quality of life increased exponentially. I continue to maintain my recovery through daily meditation practice, weekly therapy, and 12-step work. With these new tools and understanding of my past, I can think about my future in a new way. The recovery and relief I have experienced from proper and thorough treatment of my mental illness gives me hope that others can also recover, no matter how hopeless things may seem, and that I can be a lived-experience practitioner who helps people learn how to live their lives to their fullest potential. Having seen myself recover so much more than I previously thought possible, I want to continue my dedication to helping others recover from similar illnesses and disorders by joining the University of Minnesota’s Integrated Behavioral Health Masters of Professional Studies program. Soon after I completed my undergraduate degree in English, I was introduced to Alcoholics Anonymous by friends who saw themselves and their recovery in my struggles. Since then, I have spent much of my time in leadership roles within the fellowship, which is where I began honing personal growth edges in conflict management and appropriate communication. In sponsoring other non-binary and male-identifying people, I have spent years in a volunteer peer support role, helping others with disordered alcohol use process their experience and spiritual growth. I believe the Integrated Behavioral Health program would provide me the training and knowledge in science-based tools and practices to expand this role, working in a wider community, with people of diverse needs.

For most of my life, I struggled with obsessive suicidal ideation from severe depression and anxiety since enduring a series of traumatic events in my childhood. I was treated for Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder, developing Alcohol Use Disorder in my early adulthood, from which I have now been in remission since 2018 with the help of my counselors and community. During the course of the COVID-19 pandemic, I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder by my long-term therapist, and with complex-post-traumatic stress disorder and ADHD by a neuropsychologist. The toll has been heavy on all of my relationships, particularly with my family, but currently, I am four-and-a-half years from my last drink and through dilligent effort in my mental health and spiritual recovery, I have been able to repair those relationships. These new diagnoses more accurately correspond to the range of behavioral and identity-related symptoms that I have experienced since childhood.Prior to these diagnoses, I lost hope in treating my depression and anxiety. I received help from my therapists and mental health practitioners to endure my symptoms through that period, but struggled to reach the level of functioning I hoped was possible. After my new individualized diagnosis, I went through intensive outpatient DBT, which has rejuvenated my engagement with life and allowed me a capacity for executive function that I was operating without for many years. My experience with DBT has also reaffirmed my belief in the efficacy of mental health and behavioral therapy. Once my practitioners and I recognized my specific neurodiversity, treating my symptoms as parts of disorders, my quality of life increased exponentially. I continue to maintain my recovery through daily meditation practice, weekly therapy, and 12-step work. With these new tools and understanding of my past, I can think about my future in a new way. The recovery and relief I have experienced from proper and thorough treatment of my mental illness gives me hope that others can also recover, no matter how hopeless things may seem, and that I can be a lived-experience practitioner who helps people learn how to live their lives to their fullest potential. Having seen myself recover so much more than I previously thought possible, I want to continue my dedication to helping others recover from similar illnesses and disorders by joining the University of Minnesota’s Integrated Behavioral Health Masters of Professional Studies program. Soon after I completed my undergraduate degree in English, I was introduced to Alcoholics Anonymous by friends who saw themselves and their recovery in my struggles. Since then, I have spent much of my time in leadership roles within the fellowship, which is where I began honing personal growth edges in conflict management and appropriate communication. In sponsoring other non-binary and male-identifying people, I have spent years in a volunteer peer support role, helping others with disordered alcohol use process their experience and spiritual growth. I believe the Integrated Behavioral Health program would provide me the training and knowledge in science-based tools and practices to expand this role, working in a wider community, with people of diverse needs.