In the 8th grade, I lost one of my best friends to suicide. I was downplaying her comments and emotions. When I was informed that she had passed, I told myself that I would never let anyone close to me feel that hopeless. After Mallory died, I committed myself to school and athletics. I was finding ways to cope and improve the value of life in myself and those around me. She helped me find my calling in behavioral psychology. In the summer of 2020, I got a tattoo of her favorite book line, "so it goes" in context, it means just because someone is gone right now doesn't mean they are gone forever; they still exist at other points in time such as memories and our actions and choices. When finding out my little sister was feeling hopeless and alone brought up the memories of how I ignored Mallory and the things she said. I let my sister confide in me. I became her rock, her support system. Mallory's memory reminds me every day that, yes, life is hard. There will be trials and tribulations, but we need to move forward. There are people out there who want help, and I have chosen to spend my life being the help that those people need. As a society, we need to normalize mental health illnesses. It is hard enough for people to come to grips with a mental illness, but having society tell them that they are broken or "contagious" will lead to more people like Mallory. People who can't take the isolation anymore.

As someone who struggles with severe anxiety and mild depression, I do a few things to help cope with the intense feelings and emotions brought on by these issues, such as athletics, soccer, weight training, CrossFit, MMA, etc. Another outlet is reading, finding a book or an author who gives me an escape into another reality or person's world—allowing me to connect and admire their characters and escape from the anxiety of the natural world in an educational and stimulating way. Lastly, music. finding a playlist or creating one full of artists and songs that help me positively express my emotions and feelings, rather than letting them bottle up and cause damage to myself mentally.

Throughout my life, I have seen the impact of mental health on myself and those I care deeply about. In my 8th grade year, a friend of mine took her life because she felt as though she had no one to turn to in her darkest moments, and after being diagnosed with severe anxiety my junior year I have a completely different perspective on the struggles people have in life when coping with a mental disorder. These life-altering events have given me the career goals, personal goals, and life goals I have today. I plan to study Behavioral sciences and work with those who struggle the most with mental illness than the majority of society. I have been able to find ways to cope and overcome my social anxiety in order to mend broken relationships, make more friends, and meet the love of my life. Living with a constant weight or fear in your shoulders is hard, but not impossible. the world is a tense, dark, and stressful place full of triggers and bad people. I've learned that the easiest way to get through it is to hold on to yourself and do what you need to do to become the best version of yourself, the version you aspire to be. Happy, healthy, and in control.

Finding an outlet! As someone who struggles with mental health, finding an outlet to help relieve anxiety was HUGE. Look for any extracurricular activities, reading, writing, photography, anything you can do to distract your mind from stress, depression, anxiety, etc. Another way to cope is to cling to family and friends, only isolate yourself if your outlet requires quiet, alone time such as reading or writing. Try to always confide in people you trust. Allowing yourself to formulate and/or manifest your condition will only hurt you in the long run.

The idea that we have smart and determined people who want to make a difference. Personally, I believe that having mental health advocates will change our future the most. mental health, even though it is a big topic right now, is still overlooked and belittled. It sets a precedence that if you suffer from any form of mental health, you are not as capable to complete tasks or jobs. In today's society, we have people speaking up and stepping out, and proving this stereotype wrong. science even shows that everyone suffers from some form of mental health. Having people be courageous and determined to set the stereotype straight gives me hope that our society will learn to adapt and change and not belittle people based on how their brain functions, especially when most times you can not change it. Today people are using their voices more than ever and my hope is that they will use their voices to change the world rather than start controversies and battles within society.

one of the most important lessons I have learned recently is that plans and situations change. for the longest time, I had a set plan on how my life was going to go and what I was going to achieve. once I got to college I realized that the plans I made as a 15-year-old freshman in high school, may not line up with the dreams and aspirations I have as a 19-year-old college student. I had to learn to live comfortably, uncomfortable. I had to learn that things arent always set in stone and that it's okay to change the plan as you get older and experience new things and meet new people. It's been hard, especially since my parents have been holding me to a dream I had 4 years ago, but I've learned to adapt and to thrive in environments and situations I never thought I could. it has given me more confidence in myself to know that I can adapt to life all on my own. as someone who struggles with severe social anxiety this college experience has opened my eyes and showed me that the only person limiting my potential is myself and it has made me get out of my comfort zone and try new things and I will forever be grateful for my mental progress and my new outlook on life.

1. Because I'm a rich kid trying to take money from people who actually need it (not really, I can't afford to pay out of state and I can't get residency till the 2023-2024 academic year) 2. stay at home/trophy wife (again not really, I want to be department head for a behavioral sciences unit or at a state hospital/penitentiary) 3. I didn't, I use daddy's money to solve everything (I have severe social anxiety and I moved 9 1/2 hours away from home to go to my dream school)