Smearing my ears against the pillows was my desperate attempt to occlude an insatiable feeling. Almost every night, I’d hear my mother silently weep in the next room. We lived in one of the most penurious parts of New York, and though life was hard, one thing always remained true: perseverance is survival. I’m a first-generation American from an immigrant family, and though I was young, I subconsciously knew that it was my duty to achieve a better future for my family’s sake. But homelessness was a storm we were barely capable of outrunning, and each time it happened, I questioned, "Was I even allowed to have a good future?"
We eventually moved to Ohio for a fresh start, and though we were financially better off here, diversity was nonexistent. I was a brown speck in my white school, let alone my neighborhood. I had a taste of social rejection early, was ostracized at lunch, and got constant looks around the hallways. I thought it would be because I was new, but it had unraveled far past that. I’d hear snickers after my name whenever the teacher called for attendance, and racist jokes would be thrown across the room without repercussions. I would get called “T-Series” and get my skin compared to feces. I didn’t know what a Hot Pocket was, nor did I watch the same westernized shows as them, and naturally, I put up walls, with anxiety being my only comforter.
I’ve witnessed the same parallels within my dad. He’d laugh it off, but he would tell me about how people would laugh at his accent or mock him at work. What I had failed to realize was how profound his struggle was until one evening, he asked me to help him pay a bill online. He wasn’t comfortable with technology, so I complied, and there I saw him up close and authentically for the first time. He was exhausted. I hadn’t embraced it before, but he had been working hard hours for longer than I was alive, and even through struggle, he kept his stoic figure. It showed me beauty through resilience, an inspiration; working hard with a smile on his face, because although it was strenuous labor, he provided for his family, giving me the opportunity he wasn’t able to dish out for himself. Both my mother and father dropped their pursuit of education after having me, deciding to prioritize my well-being before theirs, and I'm forever grateful for that.
I learned the meaning of purpose. I didn’t let my situation be a burden to me but an opportunity, a fresh start like my parents intended when moving here. I now keep a positive outlook on life, maintaining a 4.0 GPA, taking extensive care of my siblings so both my parents could work, and volunteering at my local mosque whenever I can, as that was one of the places that didn’t care about where you came from. I study computer science, and I understand the influence of technology for the coming years. To achieve my goals, I plan to eventually pursue building my own educational platforms, specifically for children experiencing poverty in America who may lack resources. My dreams derive from that same little boy I once was, anxious in bed about my future as I watched the instability of my family’s finances.
My experiences as a minority are exactly what drive me toward my dreams, and winning this scholarship wouldn’t just be significant financially but would be a testament to its worth and a reinforcement of my belief that opportunity belongs to all.