Mental illness has been present in various forms throughout my life. I have seen many people I love struggle silently, and have sometimes found myself doing the same. It wasn't until I graduated high school that I realized just how much of a toll mental health can take if it is not cared for, and looking back I see so many things that would have been avoided if I had just known how to deal with these things.
My aunt committed suicide when I was in 6th grade, and the toll that it took on me and my family is still present today. I wasn't told that she had taken her life at first, only that she had passed away. She died young, she was turning 27 that year and was about to marry as well. My dad was devastated, and my grandfather was too. When they explained to me how she had died, and why, I was left more confused than before. She was part of the Hindu community, and apparently, she had been cast out of her group because she had lost her virginity before marrying. My parents explained to me that they had sent her death threats, that her fiance was harassing her outside of her home, and that she was so ashamed that she hid, even from us, until her final moments. She had no one to turn to, she was completely alone. My dad traveled to Venezuela to attend her funeral, but when he came back, things had gotten worse. The people from my aunt's community had turned to us, and they stalked my dad on social media, sending him horrible messages about my aunt and at one point even threatening him. My dad sank into a deep depression, and even though he tried to keep it hidden from us, it was impossible to ignore the pain that he felt. My aunt's suicide took an incredible toll, and it changed the way I perceived things drastically.
After her death, I was introduced to a world I had not previously been exposed to. It was the ugly side of mental health, the one people don't like talking about. I started treating people differently. No matter who it was, I would always try to help the person. In some cases, I was way out of my depth, but I tried so hard to help people struggling with themselves, even if it meant sacrificing my mental health in the process. I met so many people in difficult situations, I tried my best to befriend them. I never wanted anybody to be alone, not like my aunt was. Even if it was just talking to someone at the bus stop, or calling someone while they were down, I was willing to help. It became very clear to me, however, that I couldn't help everybody. Sometimes it got out of hand, sometimes they threatened to kill themselves, sometimes they tried, and I would feel so helpless, no matter how much I tried I couldn't help them. It was then that I realized that I was not alone, other people were willing to help. I found that one of the best ways to help somebody was to encourage them to talk to a professional or even just an adult. I started educating myself in ways to help people help themselves.
Now I know that sometimes people suffer on the inside, and it can feel like an impossible battle to win. But I learned that being beside someone in their darkest, lowest and most difficult moment can be the difference between life and death. I strive to help those around me and encourage others to do the same. Sometimes it feels as if we are helpless, unable to save those around us. But, in the end, all it takes is your presence, and you might be a little less lonely after.