I can use several words to describe my relationship with Christ, yet at the same time, I can use just one. That word is peace; I found that finding peace in life wasn’t dependent on a grade or the affirmation from the outside world, especially since being guided by the Holy Spirit. There will always be something that you must learn through every stage of your life. Coming to Christ during my freshman year of high school, I found joy when I had to deny myself, push down the idolatry that I once had for several things that wouldn't come with me in the grave, and found peace that surpasses all understanding. Throughout my time, where I struggled with temptations, served in the house of the Lord, and prayed even in my hardest seasons, I found a reason to continue with my journey in a cruel world that we often see as devoid of anything good. And in my relationship, I found a reason to be a light in this darkness as an example to my peers, so they too can receive that peace that I spent years searching for, even when he was knocking at the doors of our hearts the entire time. When it comes to my academics, the goal that's been set in my heart is to work towards becoming a psychologist. This is out of love, specifically for the youth who are the most vulnerable in this broken world. I understand that I must reap so eventually I can sow, yet at the same time I must rely on the Lord for his direction. As I am currently in my Junior year of high school, the most important thing I can do is wait. And as I wait, I must continue to sow. To do that, I focus on my merit by being honest academically, set goals to not be static, and have trust that he will guide me to meet connections that will also help me drive towards the Lord's plan for my life, and depend on Christ throughout any season, which is crucial for anyone in the Christian faith. No matter what I do or where I go, I must always walk in humility. I’m aware that I am one person; my life is like a pebble compared to the glory of the Lord. I, for one, believe everyone's life is a story, not of themselves but of Jesus Christ. When I reflect on my past, full of lost hope, finding things on the internet that no child of that age should have any access to, and the utter humiliation that I subjected myself to both acting in ways that I shouldn’t have ever and going along with those who I knew had no good intentions for my life; I find a reason to continue following God, he is so much bigger than I am so that's why I choose to celebrate instead of moping about anything that I am subject to experience, because I want to show everyone how the Lord has truly changed me.

When I was young a particularly selfish reason helped me choose my dream, which at the time was law, though when I matured, I gained other ambitions, which caused the pursuit I held for years to crumble beneath my feet. Today I find myself sharing the ambitions of those who come to fight the growing mental health problems that plague our communities, in which case more particularly the youth who have very few choices of what they must experience. I feel that I've been inspired to become a youth psychologist by my mother, who is also a psychiatric nurse, as well as my experience caring for children at my church. It understands that hours will have to be invested into such ambitions, from a pre-med in psychology to eventually doing clinicals following an experience through grit and determination in med school, though it is warranted for those positions. It is mainly known to me because I've witnessed my mother return for her bachelor's in nursing, while she continued to work full-time to support us. Like she is a nurse, I want to be a psychologist worthy of helping my future patients, worthy of the trust of their guardians, and, more importantly, worthy of my patients' trust. I’ve watched the growing problems in my community, as individuals my age experience pain that makes me realize how blessed I truly am. Therefore, instead of an actionless fear for the future, I would rather be one of the many who aim to help the world beyond my life be a place of health and unity. In order to do such a thing, funding from this scholarship will help me sway the high cost, lower the amount of my student loans, and give me fewer concerns for my future. This is mainly because higher education is expensive, making me admit to what is realistic in which I’ve heard many circumstances of people who plan to pursue my field having to drop out due to the weight of the expenses after achieving my goal having to deal with less student loans will allow me to seek more goals which come from my heart, which include having a family, buying a home in spite of what my generation is often led to believe and becoming a figure of selflessness by investing my earnings furthermore in what matters the most, the future of our communities because that's what will bring us as people into a better future. To me, learning to be someone like who I inspire to be is what maturity is all about.

I don’t remember when I realized that there is evil in this world. This evil is willing to destroy the families in our communities, strip away the innocence from the most vulnerable, and take what has always been for the less fortunate. When I look at this world I pity children the most, knowing how little control they have over situations. We live in a time where youth are encouraged to take their lives, I’ve always wanted to do something to solve this problem. I know no one should ever want to wish for a self-inflicted departure from this world, yet those my age and younger do it out of desperation every day. That is why I want to pursue a career in youth psychology. In this way, I can help give peace of mind to those living some of the most valuable years of their lives. I see it as an obligation more than anything that I’d quickly neglect due to an inconvenience. I've set my heart on helping the most vulnerable because often, they have no idea how they can help themselves. I’m aware that I am one person, and I can’t help everyone. I can’t speak life into every situation, but what I believe is that if you have hate, you’d do nothing and if you have love you’d make an attempt. If I can give an account or make one person who represents a future peace of mind, who am I to say the purpose that I strive for today went in vain? I don’t have a clue on what challenges are ahead, how long it will take to achieve this goal, nor how far that I’ll go past my intentions, but one thing that I know for certain is that no one had a right to dictate my ability to make an impact because I made this goal something beyond personal, because when you work for the wellbeing of others it is selfish to think of those that you’re responsible for as husk. That’s why I refuse to put this to rest, because unresolved pain in a child's life can lead to lasting wounds in adulthood. Even if today I can only look at the faces of my peers and give them words of encouragement, if I strive to make a positive impact on this world by working to heal its future, the evil in this world will be even a little more weak.

Over the years, I have had much time to think of my dreams, what I wish to accomplish, and how I will achieve those things. Now, when I think of my current dreams of being a psychologist for adolescents, I see that there is still much room for improvement, yet I know that that is what my youth is for. I know that I deserve to follow my dreams, to be able to strive towards them and eventually achieve them. I continuously take honor in my opportunities, when many may not get the chance. I have advanced in my focus in my community, placing importance and commitment on the roles that I currently have, both in student government and in the sports that I decide to commit myself to each season. I do this because I understand that I am here for a purpose, and to throw away any of these opportunities would be disrespecting myself and those who believe in who they know I am.  I understand that I will have to place commitment in what I will do in the future, knowing that the payoff will not just be handed to me; instead, I have to plant seeds in my life with the desire to help it grow. There will be obstacles to my dreams, which will always be true as long as you do something to achieve them, whether they are for yourself, others, or for a cause that inspires you to act. Those in my life who have committed have achieved their goals, those whom I look up to have acted, and people looking up to them are just the outcomes of them deciding to follow a dream. No one deserves to have a dream unless they are willing to run towards it, because a dream without action is just a thought. I will not allow my dreams to be thoughts because I know that just one person can make a difference in another's life.  If I make the effort to bring joy to the lives of the youth who have lost it so early in life, I can assist in the development of successful and confident individuals in our society. Therefore, I am worth the dreams I desire to achieve because I act. I won't allow my dreams to be in vain, nor will I give another person the privilege to push me down and keep me stagnant. My intentions for what I receive are to advance in this dream, which includes my opportunities that I have learnt to grab and advance in. Overall, gratitude is the most important thing, I give it in response to this opportunity. The chance to earn something for revealing the significance of my dreams is nothing short of benevolent.

Faith in Christ doesn’t just build you, it changes you. Throughout my time believing that Jesus saved my life I've been more invested in the community than I’ve ever been, from the organization of Bible study with fellow students in my high school to the use of the internet to speak on the Gospel with people that likely I will never see in person, an advancement in my faith and a way to show love to those who have been far from it. Before I found God, my leadership style was in vain. I was more of an unsuccessful follower, saying things that should have never come from my mouth and falling into a deep uncertainty in my life. It was unfortunate to say, but for a long time, I was hopeless, like many others in this world. Since surrendering my life to Christ I no longer follow the world, instead, I’ve chosen to lead by example, believing that someone will see my life and hopefully learn a thing; with those possibilities, and believing that I can be used despite what I’ve done in the past I’ve pushed through temptations to disobey authority, making snarky comments on people, or live in the many sins that kept me under chains for almost a decade, I have faith that leading by example has been successful, I’ve been told by friends and acquaintances that they’re inspired by the way that I live and I hope that I can continue being an example, not out of my honor, in retrospect I have imperfections that are being revealed to me constantly. Rather out of honoring the Word, knowing that a leader is there to serve. One of the times that I led someone through faith was with my sister in Christ, whom I consistently engage in Bible study with. Though I only met her this year due to her being considered underclassmen, I believe that I’ve led her. We’ve had conversations and I try my best to engage in them truthfully because I'm serving her, and in a way, I see that she’s served me as well. Within these experiences that I had with her was a time where I showed vulnerability, recently having someone close to me leave to be with the Lord, I continued the Bible Studies. Despite the ache in my heart, I continued to have faith in the fact that the Lord is all things good. When I think of her, I have faith that if she experiences such a thing she’ll also understand that the Lord called someone home, who are we to complain about someone leaving the world to be with The Father? This experience shaped my vision of the future because the Lord had grown me immensely in that time. I've learned what it means to be used by him. I want to end this on a note of gratitude towards the Build and Bless Foundation because my intentions for this are to further my education as an undergraduate after the completion of my high school education. Thank you for providing this opportunity to write an essay on leadership in Christ and for the chance to receive this scholarship.