I strive to live my life every day as an example of kindness and patience. I believe that leadership would cease to exist without humility. I look at humility as a combined act of kindness and patience. I believe it is an honorable practice to get into, that of treating others the way you would like to be treated. It is important to remember that you never truly know what someone is going through and that is why it is so crucial to always be kind and patient. Leaders do not gain their stance as leaders respectively through fear. Leadership should never be built on fear, it should be built on mutual respect. It is impossible to genuinely respect somebody if they do not demonstrate a likewise respect to you. It is possible to exist as a leader and not hold yourself to greater standards than those around you. Leadership isn’t power, it is direction. It is an arrow pointed at a greater cause for good that positively impacts everyone working toward that cause. Leadership is a group effort. I do not believe that all leaders are necessarily seen. There is so much that goes on behind the scenes. Leadership doesn’t have to look one certain way, it just has to remain centered around the cause. Once again, humility breeds healthy leadership dynamics. Groups that cultivate kind and patient environments are pioneering for success. Leadership is not cut-throat or competitive, it should be beneficial in all forms. It is not always easy to be a leader. It certainly comes with its pushback and challenges. Leadership is a constant battle to stay motivated and not give up. Once again, this is why your support system of other leaders is so important. Leaders do not have to do it all alone. Nobody said that leadership is a singular act. After all, what is leadership if you are all by yourself? Leaders are not robots or machines that can do it all in a day all alone. Leaders need breaks and encouragement. Leaders need kindness and patience bestowed upon them as they bestow on others. I truly believe that I am a leader. I believe that I am kind and patient. I believe I do my best to act in humility. I believe that there are days when I fall short and have to count on others to help get me back on my feet. That is okay though. That is okay because even in all of my imperfections and failure, the leadership that I strive to exemplify every day is going around. It is impacting others. I am creating villages of other leaders. My villages are there to support me so that I may continue to rise and lead a life of leadership. Perhaps my role as a leader is unique, but I feel that I am doing good for the world while remaining realistic and honest and human. There are times that I feel helpless like there is not much I can do. Everything seems difficult sometimes. However, I know that I am never too good to not at least exemplify a life of kindness and patience.

The movie that has had the greatest impact on my life is the movie that inspired my curiosity about the career I am actively pursuing. I was in elementary school when I watched the 90s drama “My Girl” for the first time. I sobbed big, heavy tears towards the end of the film. The movie is centered on Vada, the main character, an eleven-year-old girl. Her father is a mortician and widowed. Vada’s mother passed away when she was just a baby. Vada and her father live in the funeral home that he owns and operates. Naturally, death is something very normal to Vada, as it surrounds her daily life. Vada is confident and sassy. However, Vada’s best friend, Thomas J., is hesitant to be as daring as Vada, but still obedient to her beck and call. Their relationship is sweet and childish and encapsulating. The movie details their journeys and the ups and downs of growing up in the funeral services industry. This film, as it did for many in the industry, inspired my pursuit of becoming a mortician. I was so intrigued by so many aspects of the movie, from the embalming process to the cosmetology procedures. I have worked at the local funeral home in my small town for almost two years now. I was hired after the start of my enrollment in cosmetology school as a junior in high school. I have been doing my best to prepare for a career based in funeral services as I will be majoring in them this fall as a freshman in college. Since working at the funeral home, I have acquired a skill set composed of empathy and a true understanding of the deep importance of death care. Thanks to “My Girl,” I explored a career that I have since become extremely passionate about. My heart is deeply invested in funeral services and I truly feel that it is my calling. “My Girl” has had an unmatched and incomparable impact on my life. I never thought that a movie from the 90s that I watched by chance one day on Netflix would impact me as greatly as it did. I am unexplainably thankful for the beauty of “My Girl” and the delicate and accurate portrayal of death, mourning, and the funeral services industry. As I said, “My Girl” is a movie that left me in tears, and it still brings me to tears every time I watch it. It is emotional and inspiring and captivating. I love the movie “My Girl” and am every day appreciative of the great impact it had on my life and career aspirations.

My mother was absent from my life for over a decade due to her addiction to drugs. I was five years old when my mother chose drugs over her family. I vividly remember the night that my mother walked out on my father, brother, and I– feeling deep in my gut, even at five years old, that she would not be back for a long time. Her drug addiction spiraled into more bad decisions and she was inevitably incarcerated five years after she walked out on us. I remember always feeling a sense of sadness for not having my mother in my life, but I think due to my age, the sadness was not as deep as it could have been– because I did not even quite understand what I was missing out on. To some degree, I hurt when I saw other girls my age with their mothers, but at the same time I felt okay, not having anything good to compare the hurt to. My mother’s drug addiction directly influenced my drive to make something of myself. I knew that I never wanted to be in the position that she had gotten herself into. From the moment she left, at five years old, I was religiously devoted to my academic goals. School was somewhat of a safe haven for me and I thrived there. I needed something good and constant in my life, and it was me, I was the constant thing. I learned to be proud of myself and the goals I was chasing. I knew that my life did not have to be defined by addiction nor would I let it. As an eighteen year old senior in high school, I have strayed from social norms like partying where substances are involved. I have made a habit of leading a sober lifestyle and instead, choosing a pursuit of success. I have dreams of living a mentally and physically healthy lifestyle, no matter how hard I have to work to make those dreams come true. I think it is a common misconception that one cannot rise from the grasp of having an addict as a parent. At times, it feels suffocating and defining, but I have to remind myself that it is not. I want to be able to say, “My mother’s drug addiction was extremely difficult to live with. It was hard growing up without her and knowing what she chose over me. I don’t like it, but I’m going to grow from it and into something better.”

If I could have everyone in the world read one book, I would suggest The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid. I like to say that this book altered my brain chemistry. There are so many elements of the story that can appeal to so many different audiences. This book is the ultimate tale of how fame can lead to an unfulfilling life of regret, pain, and the pressure to keep up appearances. The main character, Evelyn, is a movie star who rises from poverty into the growing film industry in 1950s Hollywood. Her story details the sacrifices she made and the backs she stabbed to be a household name. Evelyn gives insight into the dark background of what Hollywood actresses are living in secret. Her story is raw and real as she exposes the years of her life that she lived under her stage name, Evelyn Hugo. Who was Evelyn Hugo? Throughout her life, she acquired seven different husbands, many of them more career-motivated than love-motivated. However, there is love in this story. Celia St. James is another rising actress in 1950s Hollywood, one that is a big competition for Evelyn. Celia has a huge secret: she’s a lesbian. Evelyn didn’t understand her sexual identity in the 1950s, but with age, she came to understand that she was bisexual. These two characters form a very secretive relationship, but homosexuality was not accepted in their era, and their careers would have become obsolete if they were found out. The relationship between Evelyn and Celia is the truest, most heartbreaking love. Throughout the life and many husbands of Evelyn Hugo, an incredible and diverse story is revealed. It is emotional and beautiful and tragic. This story is my go-to book suggestion for everyone, as it is vast and captivating, and I think you would like it too.

I was ten years old when my mother was incarcerated. Her incarceration, like many other women in Oklahoma, was a direct result of her drug addiction. When asked, my mother answers that her drug of choice was, “Anything I could get my hands on,” but she often took to meth as a main drug. My mother’s addiction was intense and constant from the time I was five years old until her incarceration in 2015. My earliest memories of my mom are tainted dark by her addiction. I remember the night she left my dad. They were fighting over her addiction; he had had enough and she left. I was awake for the fighting and I watched my mother walk out and down the street through the slit in my blinds. The image of my mother walking away from me and our family has never left me, as it is one of my first core memories. I grew up without my mom. I was raised by a single dad who had to go on emergency leave from the U.S. Army after my mother left and proved herself unfit as a parent. My father did his best to raise my brother and I as best as he could, but inevitably, he did not do a perfect job. He struggled to bring me up as mothers bring up their daughters. I spent much of my childhood pining in jealousy of girls who had their mothers. I always thought they had no idea how lucky they were to have someone who could nurture to their unique needs. My dad tried, but he couldn’t understand girlhood. I so badly craved the mother-daughter connection that I saw between my friends and their mothers, and I often felt like an outlander. I felt so out of place in elementary and middle school. I didn’t know the right way to dress or how to fix my hair; I couldn’t relate to the things other girls my age were experiencing. My mother’s incarceration often left me feeling indescribably lonely. When my mom first left, I gained a unique sense of independence. I have always been extremely motivated to do things myself and to do them well. School was an outlet for me to express these skills. I have always been motivated for success and the mark left on me by my mother’s incarceration has been a constant reminder to strive for better things. Today, my mother is sober and thriving. She is no longer incarcerated and we have begun forming the mother-daughter relationship that I have been missing. She motivates me to be better than her and to use her story as inspiration to do big things, things that she missed out on due to her drug addiction and incarceration. I have plans of going to college and leading a successful and fulfilling career in which I remain motivated by my mother’s present support and powerful story.