Managing my mental health became a priority after I found myself on the verge of dropping out of school and bedridden for months.
At the time, I didn’t recognize the warning signs. It began subtly, skipping church, cutting off friends and family, and slowly abandoning my dream of earning a college degree. I didn’t fully understand what I was going through, and I did my best to hide it like it would go away, thinking of it as a cut healing, not as a problem that would only worsen.
To my parents, it looked like I was simply being lazy. I don’t blame them, we barely saw each other due to conflicting schedules, and they work hard every day to support our family. But inside, I was struggling with feelings I couldn’t put into words. I wish I had at least spoken out.
That silence cost me a lot. I lost close friendships, ended a relationship, and nearly lost my job due to repeatedly calling in. I felt alone and unsure of how to ask for help. Then, unexpectedly, someone reached out, an ex-partner I hadn’t spoken to in a while. We still share a social circle, and during a group hangout, she said, “You’re not the same Ryan I used to know.”
At first, I didn’t understand. But later, she called me and expressed how much I meant to her, to our friends, and to the people in my life. That conversation only lasted an hour, but it reignited something in me. I wasn’t completely better afterward, but it gave me the motivation to start pushing myself again in life. I returned to class, went back to church, started exercising, and began reconnecting with those who supported me.
Now, nearly three months later, my mindset has changed. I’m more focused and consistent in my routines. I’ve learned to value the people around me and to check in with them. I also make time to reflect and recognize how far I’ve come, even when progress feels slow.
This experience taught me that growth often comes from hardship. I’ve gained strength, resilience, and a deeper sense of empathy. These are qualities I now carry with me into the classroom, my relationships, and my future.
I wish I had this knowledge from the beginning but I will take lessons and growth as they come to me and appreciate that I got that call.