All Disney characters are created to imbed attributes seen within only the best people in reality. Ariel expresses the importance of staying true to yourself, Rapunzel represents the significance of curiosity, Mulan displays the value of courage- the list goes on. I grew up watching and adoring these princesses and their respective movies, but one stands out to me amongst the rest. Princess Tiana from The Princess and the Frog. That film premiered in 2009, when I was just four years old. The perfect age to be mystified by Disney films and their princesses. Tiana stood out to me from the very first time I watched the film, just as much as her storyline did. Just like me, Tiana was from the South, with big plans and dreams she hoped to one day accomplish. Tiana represents many hard working women that have raised me, and I idolized her in every respect. Throughout her story, Tiana faced many hardships that blocked the path to her dreams. She was easy to admire, yearning to open a restaurant to honor her deceased father's aspirations. It seemed that at every turn in her life, she was discouraged or prevented from succeeding. Nobody would help provide the funds for her dream, she had to navigate the Louisiana swamps as a literal frog, and she struggled every step of the way. But when it really mattered, when faced with impossible adversity, Tiana prevailed. She was persistent and determined, refusing to give up on what she knew she deserved. In the end, she married the husband of her dreams, and finally got to establish the nicest restaurant in New Orleans. Tiana was also the very first African American Disney princess, and her presence finally gave African American children a hero who looked like them. Tiana never gave up and she never gave in. I aspire to be as smart and committed as Princess Tiana.

I have lived my entire life in the Deep South- swarmed with religion, conservative politics, and tradition. Despite the limited World view I have been presented with, I have always yearned to learn more about history, cultures and people. My education on the Civil War wasn't in depth, I wasn't even aware of American slavery until middle school. I didn't know that Christianity wasn't the only religion throughout the World, or that the American government commits war crimes on a daily basis. I was taught to believe that the United States is the greatest country in the World, that capitalism was the only reliable economic system, and to blindly follow our leaders without hesitation. I developed independent thinking only on the encouragement of my mother, a fiercely opinionated, educated woman. My guardian angel, the only one to teach me about the deep roots of racism in the South, the incredible Roman Empire, and the cruelty of the Holocaust in Europe. The combination of my own curiosity and my mother's beliefs spurred a life-long interest in history in myself, learning and remembering cultures and stories from centuries ago. History has taught me lessons I could never learn from my personal experience. I will never truly know the suffering of African slaves, the prejudice towards the waves of American immigrants throughout time, the fear felt by Afghani women as they watched their liberty disappear. I am a white woman in America, one of the most privileged groups in the World. Still, I can begin to understand the morals of these stories. Humans are cruel creatures, vying for self-preservation and greed. However, humans can be good. We can be helpful, rallying together to protest for and assist marginalized groups. We can be understanding and kind, comforting one another after tragedies such as the 9/11 attacks. We can work together, building incredible empires and forces unimaginable. With this knowledge and these lessons, I want to absorb and learn as much about the history of civilization as possible. I want to hear perspectives and stories told by those who nobody before me has cared enough to hear. I want to experience history itself, and document everything I can. There is nothing more important than the past, as it can teach us everything we need to know about the future. I plan to study history or political science, attend law school, and become a civil rights lawyer. The kind of lawyer who listens to people, who fights for justice, who actually cares what happens to their clients. I want to use my privilege for good, actively standing up for those who previously had no voice. People can be harmful and cruel, but I believe underneath it all, we are good. However, we must work together and understand the past, that is the only way forward.

I always had a suspicion- my grandmother's aggressiveness, my father's compulsive lying and neglect, my aunt's ability to flip from loving to abrasive- I knew these things weren't typical. I also knew my own characteristics and emotions weren't expected from a 'normal' young girl. Despite being aware of these issues, I didn't have a name for any of them at first. Of course, my family's widespread mental illnesses weren't discussed amongst us. We are from the conservative Deep South, a place where those topics are thought of as taboo. Nobody ever told me the circumstances of my aunt's death- it was only recently that I realized that she had committed suicide. I was only ten when she died, but I was aware that she suffered from serious bipolar. Her condition was so debilitating that she lived with my grandparents into her adulthood and up until her death. My father told me that she had died from consuming my grandmother's medication rather than her own, that she had died from an overdose. Only now do I know that her actions were purposeful. This realization, although obvious, provided an explanation that I never had before. It changed something in me. My aunt's passing led me on a trail of searching. I wanted to know what was 'wrong' with me, what was wrong with all of my family. My entire life, I have suffered with sudden and powerful mood changes, periods of severe depression and isolation, and destructive cycles of behavior. My family, specifically my mother, brushed my behavior off, despite my expressed suspicion of having a mental illness. Both of my parents suffer from mental illness- My father is a sociopath who I have completely cut ties with, and my mother has bouts of depression of anxiety. I just wanted answers. During my investigations, I attended therapy, asked my family uncomfortable questions, and focused on my own potential illness. Why am I so quick to anger? Why do I always seek company and assurance? Why can't I stand being ignored? Finally, my therapist agreed with my suspicions. We both suspected that I suffer from borderline personality disorder. I discovered that my grandmother had a personality disorder, with possible schizophrenia. My brother has depression, and my father was neglectful to my brother and I. It was all a web, and I needed to know where to go from there. First, I decided to focus on understanding and compassion. Nobody can control their trauma, and what aftermath they experience because of it. It wasn't my aunts fault that she committed suicide, or my grandmother's fault that she lived the last 10 years of her life in isolation. These people are still my family, and they suffered greatly. I also decided to learn coping mechanisms and routines to help me best manage my issues. I seek to help others who suffer from a variety of mental illnesses, I've seen firsthand how badly they can affect an innocent person. Compassion, compassion, compassion. In my future, I want to help as many people as possible. I want to be there for my friends who go through hard times. I don't want anybody to reach the conclusion my aunt did, I don't want anybody to feel as lonely as my brother did, and I refuse to be a bystander to my own self-destruction any longer. The future is full, and the World is beginning to reach the same conclusion that I have. Mental health matters.