My entire life, I haven't been more than 50 feet away from someone with a mental illness. This may sound like an exaggeration, but it's true. Almost every person in my family has struggled with mental illness/ substance abuse, and most still struggle. I've mostly taken care of people with poor mental health. I'm sure I'm worse than I think but I've always had such a strong sense of moving forward that I've only ever come close to suicide once. I was in 8th grade, I couldn't speak because my jaw was crooked and every time I spoke, the bone rolled over my nerve and put me in unbearable pain for hours. I couldn't sleep (partly from the pain, partly from the Adderall my mom was giving me because she was pretending I had ADHD when I didn't and I wasn't strong enough to fight back, also partly because my mom made me watch my twin sister sleep because my twin sister had been suicidal for a couple years and my mom didn't want to dela with CPS for a fourth time.) (Yet. I finally separated from her last July. I live with my dad now and she can't contact me.) I was starving myself because I had been fat-shamed almost my entire life. (My BMI is 24.) And I was constantly struggling in school because my body was so overloaded, I could barely hold a pencil (my hands would shake a lot from the Adderall) or play violin. I remember this really specific moment in 2nd period, October 2024. I had been struggling with a violin part in orchestra class, and I suddenly realized I couldn't play it. No matter how hard I tried. My spinal cord had started to contract from all the stress I was under and I couldn't hold the violin correctly. I couldn't make my fingers go fast enough to keep the right time. I couldn't respond when the director constantly corrected me. But I didn't break down. I just swallowed it and decided nothing mattered anymore. I didn't eat. I didn't bathe. I didn't bother trying to do schoolwork. Or speak. Or sleep. After that dark time, I came back 100 times stronger. It took me a lot of time, but I did it. Being separated from my mom definitely helped. In my mind, happiness is a choice, and you just have to choose it. I still struggle with a lot of the same things that pushed me toward that dark place, my abusive mom, my chronic pain, and my occasional bouts of depression and lucid nightmares. The things I've seen and dealt with have forced me to mature. I look at things how they are, not how I want them to be. I don't trust easy and I don't give second chances. I walk fast and I don't censor my RBF. I don't make many friends and when I do, I don't really get close. I struggle to get close to my dad or my siblings. But don't get me wrong. The world isn't as vicious as I may describe it. Like one of my favorite songs, "The world is a curse, it'll kill if you let it." Happiness is a choice, you just gotta chose. I chose happiness. I chose to see the good alongside the bad. I chose to work as hard need to in order to build the life I want, the life I deserve. I chose to get up, brush my teeth, eat a healthy breakfast, do my best at school, treat everyone with kindness and respect, and go to work after school. When I grow up, I want to become a public health researcher. I want help find clues to find how to heal/ cure chronic pain and mental illnesses. I know it's a lot, but I know I can do it. I just need help.

Hello! My name is Penelope James Dower. My first name is after Penelope from the Odyssey, and my middle name is after my dad's best friend from childhood, who helped care for me when I was little. I'm 15 and I'm a triplet; my siblings are Henry and Matilda. They're both named after book characters as well. I'm currently a freshman at Vines High School in Plano, Texas. I'm also a Collin College freshman enrolled in a dual-credit program. My class is in the second year of participation since it's a really new program, so they treat us like guinea pigs, but it's still a fantastic opportunity! I'm part of the Vines Orchestra; I play second violin in their Philharmonic Orchestra. I enjoy the sense of community in the orchestra room, the physical and mental benefits of playing an instrument, and the interesting music we learn and play. I'm currently applying to become a freshman representative in said orchestra. Outside of school, I'm a consistent volunteer for The Friendship Circle of Dallas, an organization focused on helping Autistic children make friends and learn social skills. I love the kids I work with; everyone is the sweetest little kid, and every smile means the world. Each time I come, I help set up, play with the kids, help manage any situation that may occur with one of the kids, supervise activities, and help clean up. When I grow up, I hope to get a bachelor's degree in biostatistics and bioinformatics from the University of North Texas, then I'll get into the master's degree program at Rice University and get a master's degree in biostatistics and bioinformatics. I want to become a Bioinformatics Scientist. I know I'd be successful because I thrive in academic environments and always strive to learn as well as I can and get the most out of every opportunity. I'm especially passionate about epidemiology, the study of diseases and their effect on society. As a Bioinformatics Scientist, I would conduct research and make data sets, one step at a time, making breakthroughs in the healthcare field and raising the quality of life for millions. For the past two years, I have been living with chronic arthritis focused on my neck and shoulders, impacting some of my motor function and causing a lot of pain daily. I've recently found better ways to manage it, but I could enjoy my life more with better research. As someone who has struggled with chronic pain, research and testing are extremely important to me to get the best results for people who deserve relief and happiness.

Hello! My name is Penelope James Dower. My first name is after Penelope from the Odessey, and my middle name is after my dad's best friend from childhood who helped take care of me when I was little. I'm 15 and I'm a triplet; my siblings names are Henry and Matilda. They're both named after book characters as well. I'm currently a freshman at Vines High School in Plano, Texas. I'm also currently a freshman at Collin College, enrolled in a dual-credit program. My class is the second year ever to participate so they kind of treat us like guinea pigs, but it's a really awesome opportunity! I'm part of Vines Orchestra; I play second violin in their Philharmonic Orchestra. I really enjoy the sense of community in the orchestra room, the physical and mental benefits of playing an instrument, and the interesting music we get to learn and play. I'm currently applying to become a freshman representative in said orchestra. Outside of school I'm a consistent volunteer for The Friendship Circle of Dallas, an organization focused on helping Autistic children make friends and learn social skills. I love the kids I work with, each and every one is the sweetest little kid, and every smile means the world. Each time I come, I help set up, play with the kids, help manage any situation that may occur with one of the kids, supervise activities, and help clean up. When I grow up, I hope to get a bachelor's degree in biostatistics and bioinformatics from the University of North Texas, then I'll get into the master's degree program at Rice University and get a master's degree in biostatistics and bioinformatics. I want to become a Bioinformatics Scientist. I know I'd be successful because I thrive in academic environments, and I always strive to learn as well as I can and get the most out of every opportunity. I'm especially passionate about epidemiology, the study of diseases and their effect on society. As a Bioinformatics Scientist I would conduct research and make data sets, one step at a time, making breakthroughs in healthcare field and raising the quality of life for millions. For the past two years, I have been living with chronic arthritis focused on my neck and shoulders, impacting some of my motor function and causing a lot of pain daily, I've recently found better ways to manage it but with better research, I could enjoy my life more. As someone who has struggled with chronic pain, through research and testing is extremely important to me in order to get the best results to the American people who deserve relief and happiness.