I fondly recall laying on my stomach on an uncomfortable mattress, in the westernmost room of a money-pit house, with bubble-wrapped windows mooching off the neighbor’s WiFi – who happened to be my grandparents. While my mother worked 24/7, attempting to save dollars wherever she could, and the cold had Indiana firmly in its grip, I played games on my phone and watched silly videos on YouTube. That was until I stumbled across a video about the Mongol Empire. After that, my intrigue for history proliferated, causing me to delve deeper into the past. I watched documentary after documentary while my peers watched Cartoon Network. When my sister and I were old enough, my mothers began to ask a different question in the leadup to Christmas and birthdays. They would ask, “Do you want gifts or a trip?” We quickly jumped on the offer, valuing life-long memories of a family vacation more than toys we’d rid ourselves of within a few years. Consequently, we went on a tour of the western states and to Tampa, Florida. Within a few years of this tradition, my sister, who is four years older than me, moved out. In the leadup to Christmas and birthdays, the question changed again, “Which museum do you want to visit?” Even though it is not their thing, my parents have taken me to the National Museum of the US Air Force, the National World War Two Museum, and – most recently – we went to Washington DC for the Smithsonian museums. My grandfather was the sole barber, owner, and backer of Kim’s Barbershop in Orland, Indiana for half a century. Like any old-style small-town barbershop, all sorts of things lined the walls: hundreds of army patches, unopened Pokagon soda bottles, a hermit crab skeleton, a bottle of mercury, and even a severed thumb preserved in formaldehyde. When he retired, he kept some of it, sold others, and offered several items of interest to me: a World War One and Korean war gas mask, a submarine and cavalry shirt pin, a Japanese wooden bullet, and an untouched 1980s Doc bag. Those items now decorate my shelves instead of the barbershop walls, joined by other things, such as a World War One German trench knife and a signaling mirror from the same era. For me, time spent in a museum, watching history documentaries, reading non-fiction history books, or studying the past in any other form is time very well spent. Further, discussing the knowledge I have accrued is blissful. The first civilization I became enthralled with was the Mongols and their brief yet enormous empire. After accumulating a vast data bank, I began to talk the ear off of anyone who would listen, espousing innumerable facts and history. I am resolute in my commitment to history. While many past interests have come gone, such as coding, medicine, and the military, my flame for history has never waned. Logically, I have chosen history as the field for my career; my dream position is as a museum curator, working with the historical artifacts I already collect. Of course, to achieve my dreams, I must pursue and earn a college degree. As a person of humble means, debt is not out of the question. Therefore, I hope to lessen the amount of debt I incur with the generous help of scholarships like the Learner Scholarship.

My greatest passion is history; I greatly enjoy every minute I spend learning about our past. The number of hours I have put into nonfiction books, documentaries, and historical research is incalculable. Yet, the joy of learning history is nothing compared to the exhilaration of sharing my knowledge. Logically, the path I have chosen will allow me to facilitate the learning of history for others, immerse myself in historical artifacts and knowledge, harness my creative talents, and spend my working life in a place I love to be: a museum. The path of a curator in a museum is fraught with stress and challenges. First, I will have to achieve a doctorate, a multi-year affair with difficult classes. Then, I will have to network, garner a reputation, and work my way into a curator position. At every step, I will face something that could trigger a problem I have that could quickly derail my hopes and dreams: anger issues. Anger is a human emotion we all experience at one point. But, of course, being human, we all become angry at different things and process that anger differently. Some people will become angry at any little trifle; others become angry only in extreme circumstances. Some people will have disproportionate and inappropriate responses – which may negatively impact someone’s life. Others will deal with their anger in a proper, nonharmful way. Some people are born with a quick-to-anger personality, while others naturally go with the flow. Many have had their reactions shaped by their childhood: a child that receives what they want whenever they throw a tantrum will be prone to tantrums in adulthood. Our society correctly views destroying things, insulting people, or hurting yourself as unhealthy ways to deal with anger. Consequently, many, including myself, have had to try to change how we deal with anger. A challenging but necessary task if one wants the best possible chances of achieving their goals. Under that guiding philosophy, I have worked to change how I deal with anger. For most of my life, I had little control over the fiery beast within; he would often surface at minor inconveniences with an unacceptable ferocity. For example, I embarrassed my grandfather when I didn’t win with the matchbox car – pictured below – we built together, destroyed a shelving unit because I lost a game, and tore up a test on which I received a low grade. Today, however, I am usually able to contain the beast: I can go with the flow, accept defeat, remain calm when presented with challenges, walk away from things, and bring myself down from a state of anger. Yet, even though I am largely over the hump in changing my ways, there are still times when the fiery beast escapes, unleashing his wrath. For that reason, I continue to work to change my reactions, find and use healthier outlets, and avoid the outbursts that were once exceedingly frequent. I also take advantage of anger management resources, such as reading the book I have linked. A significant source of stress that will soon be upon me, one that could help to trigger angry outbursts, is financial. In America, higher education is expensive, especially for those without the means. Therefore, winning the Second Chance Scholarship would help to alleviate that stress by allaying some of my worries. Accordingly, in the future, when I am financially able, I intend to donate money every year to scholarships, such as this one, to help others as you may help me.

Humans, by nature, are selfish. For billions of years, it was beneficial for creatures, or groups of creatures, to disregard the needs of others. Those who gave to the needy had less for themselves when hard times came along; sharing was disadvantageous. Consequently, selfishness proliferated in almost all species. For billions of years, this trend was acceptable and inevitable, according to the theories of natural selection. Further, selfishness may have been beneficial: it ensures strong offspring by dooming weak lineages since the fittest can take the most and survive the best. Today, however, many of our problems stem from human selfishness, and most of the potential benefits have been rendered null by population size, technology, limited resources, and societal designs. Therefore, the change I wish to happen in our world is to change human selfishness into selflessness – a change that would solve many world issues and end a plethora of suffering. According to the UN, there will be 8 billion people on Earth in November this year. The number 8 billion is almost incomprehensible, as is the amount of food and water necessary to sustain that population – approximately 24 billion pounds of food and 24 million cubic meters of water daily. Yet, despite the immensity, we have the resources required: the Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations estimates that with modern farming technology, we produce enough to feed 10 billion people. Nevertheless, 25,000 people die of starvation daily, according to the UN. One problem that allows this head-scratchingly curious thing to happen is a distribution issue: the top 20% of the world's population consumes 80% of the resources. Selfish humans hoard excess amounts of food and other resources, wasting much of it in the process, simply because they have the means to, without thought of others in the world who are in need. In Ukraine, a war rages, decimating large swaths of civilian land, killing combatants and non-combatants alike. All because of one man's selfishness, a dictator: Vladimir Putin. Putin has portrayed himself as the strongman of Russia, and, as a result, being perceived as weak would destroy one of his pillars of power, possibly ending his rule. Putin isn't invading Ukraine to protect his nation, prevent genocide, or eradicate Nazis as he claimed; he is invading Ukraine to maintain his image by "standing up against the bullies in NATO and the United States." Putin is acting out of selfish interests: maintaining power, retaining privileges, and amassing wealth. Most politicians in America don't work to resolve issues facing the nation and the world, do as their constituents wish, or improve the country; instead, they work out of self-interest. They intentionally polarize the people, encourage hate against certain groups, bicker between themselves, and make decisions that earn them votes or money. As a result, countless problems go unresolved – especially ones they have created – because politicians are in it for themselves. A selfless humanity would distribute food in a manner that ensured ample nutrition for all, thereby eliminating death by starvation. With no selfish desire for power, privileges, or wealth, tyranny would be a thing of the past. Similarly, leaders who cared for their people wouldn't steer their nations into devastating wars. Universal support from politicians in it for the people would solve countless problems facing their countries and the world. Changing human selfishness would solve numerous human issues and vastly improve the lives of many.

Like many Americans, my family has provided most of my financial education. They have gifted me with knowledge, advice, and guidance. However, the most influential lessons I have learned were through watching their financial choices and observing their consequences. My two mothers and one sister have provided me with ample real-life examples of what not to do financially. Both of my mothers have made many financial mistakes. One has fallen into credit card debt, and the other has had to borrow from her parents and her son. My sister, meanwhile, is an epitome of the mindless spender: she buys expensive tattoos and is surprised when she can’t afford emergency expenses, like car repairs. They have each confronted countless situations that demanded savings they didn’t have, forcing them into financial instability or neglecting the issue. The latter option, of course, inevitably brings further expenses. Such as ignoring strange noises your car makes, which can lead to towing fees. One of my mothers has learned and now saves what she can, but the other two continue to spend the entirety of their incomes. Meanwhile, my grandparents have provided me with ample examples of what to do financially. They are comfortably retired in their 70s. Yet, they’re not like many of the elderly living off social security checks; they are far from it. Throughout their working life, my grandparents made a point to set aside a portion of their income for savings, going so far as to make their money work for them in mutual funds. As a result, their assets are such that they can fund their retirement while living as they please. Debt avoidance was also a tactic of spending less: save until you can afford what you want instead of taking out credit. This combination of polar opposite examples has fueled my –often excessive– frugality. Even when I was heavily into army toys, I made a point to spend far less on them than I had received that preceding Christmas. Once I was old enough to recognize their value, I followed the lead of my grandparents and started to save my money in multiple ways: certificate of deposits, bonds, mutual funds, and a savings account. Such tactics have recently rescued me: my first car finally kicked the bucket, but I had the savings for a new one. In the future, I fully intend to continue my propensity for not spending. Unlike my parents, siblings, and many Americans, I aim to spend less than I earn, thus creating the savings that can fund unforeseen expenses. I never want to be in a position where I encounter an emergency and lack the money for the costs. The consequences of not being prepared could be far-reaching and have additional expenses. I also intend to avoid as much debt as possible. Unlike my sister, I seek scholarships, regardless of the time that effort consumes. Similarly, if I want something in the future, I will save up to buy it; I shall never buy a car I cannot afford in a one-time payment. Avoiding debt means I will save money in the end, leaving me with more to be prepared, live comfortably, or have a little fun. Finally, retirement is inevitable, no matter how far it seems today. That is something that requires savings. With Social Security expected to run out in 2035, more funds than previous generations have saved may need to be accrued for retirement. I don’t want to work until my death, so I intend to save the money to retire eventually.

My family has a propensity for committing a bad financial habit: spending beyond or at their limits. Watching money burn holes in their pockets created my –often excessive– frugality. I have learned a valuable financial lesson: spend below your limits. My two mothers and one sister have provided me with ample visual, real-life, citable evidence to support my financial practices. Both of my mothers have made many financial mistakes. One has fallen into credit card debt, and the other has had to borrow from her parents and her son. My sister, meanwhile, is a living epitome of the mindless spender: she buys expensive tattoos while her lawn lacks a mower to mow it and her a floor a vacuum to sweep it. They have each confronted countless situations that demanded savings they didn’t have, forcing them into financial instability or neglecting the issue. The latter option, of course, inevitably brings further expenses. One of my mothers has learned and now saves what she can, but the other two continue to spend the entirety of their incomes. By watching their actions, and consequences, I have developed the value that created my savings assets. The money I receive rarely goes toward anything other than gas; instead, I put it in certificates of deposits, bonds, mutual funds, or my savings account. Further, A recent event has validated my financial values: my first car kicked the bucket, but I had the savings for a new one. Having learned this important financial lesson early is, I believe, invaluable. I will, unlike many Americans, be prepared for unforeseen emergencies and be less likely to take on debt. Spending below my limits is a goal that I always intend to shoot for in hopes of maintaining financial stability.

Cyclic Vomiting Syndrome (CVS) has marred many of my earliest memories. In one, I am lying on the living room floor in front of the couch. Laying with me is my mother, grasping a large, blue bowl positioned near my head. I began gagging roughly 45 minutes after my abdominal migraine pain began, causing my mother to scoop me up and rush to the toilet. Fortunately, we made it before the vomit started flowing. Another memory involves needles, saline bags, and a hospital bed: my mother carried me through the emergency room doors so that I could receive fluids through an IV. Unsurprisingly, CVS has impacted my life beyond calculation, in both positive and negative ways. To quote Doctor Buk Li from the Children’s Winsconsin hospital during one of our many appointments, “Many kids with CVS are gamers.” That phenomenon isn’t surprising considering the common triggers for CVS episodes: heat exposure, excessive physical exertion, stress, emotional distress, or another ailment. At various times, I’ve tried to participate in demanding sports or play with friends on hot summer days. The result was predictable: an abdominal migraine, vomit, and missed practices. Even in other activities, CVS has hindered my participation capacity. For example, I tried to be in Boy Scouts of America, but I was often driven to abdominal migraines directly by a particular bully or indirectly by exposure to the elements when camping. As a result, I have an extensive collection of video games and many hours in them. For similar reasons, I am an introverted homebody with a small circle of friends, all things that were undoubtedly contributed to by my experiences with CVS. I was, for many years, a social outcast because I frequently had to stay indoors while my peers held recess outdoors. Consequently, I came to relish days of extreme weather, wherein everybody had to stay inside. Further, I spent many days learning how to accurately relay my abdominal pain on a 1-10 scale instead of learning how to add alongside my classmates. Since my parents feared I would have an episode when they weren’t there, I can count on one hand the number of times I have spent the night at a friend’s house. On the other side of the coin, CVS’s contribution to my life has innumerable positives. I appreciate what I have and don’t envy what I don’t. The reasoning is simple: had I been born in a less fortunate nation, family, or one that rejected medical interventions, I likely wouldn’t be alive. That is because the cyclical vomiting part of CVS rapidly dehydrates, which can be lethal if not addressed. Another positive is that the friends I do have, are fun, supportive, and genuinely care. Unfortunately, the window for an outcome I have longed for is rapidly closing; I may not outgrow CVS like many others. As such, the cloud of CVS will stay over my head as I progress through life, storming when it pleases, which is increasingly problematic as I advance academically. Yet, I continue to labor for a career in a passion that has never failed to intrigue me: history. Specifically, I aim to work as a curator in a place that I love to be: a museum. Further, I hope to have my own home and be financially stable, all goals that scholarships could substantially help me achieve.

Picture this: you’re a paramedic who is soundly sleeping after a long day of patients and transfers. You deserve, no, you need this sleep, for you’ve worked a long day, and tomorrow is another 12-hour shift. In the other room is your 14-year-old son playing Europa Universalis IV. Suddenly, you're ripped from a state of deep sleep, awoken by pounding and unpleasant words. You roll onto your back while rolling your eyes. After a sigh and a glance at the clock, you yell, “What’s the problem this time?” That was a frequent occurrence in my home for many years. I had –and still occasionally struggle with– anger issues. They have led to detention, referrals, being labeled a “cry baby” by peers, embarrassed relatives, and they have often hindered my learning ability. I had long recognized that I had a problem, but dealing with it was another story. Moreover, at times I didn’t want to shout in anger or punch my desk, yet I heard my voice echoing off the walls, and my fist ached with pain. Nonetheless, I have greatly improved -particularly in the last few years. While I still have occasional outbursts, I believe I am over the hump. Now I sometimes find myself the one watching a tantrum instead of being watched. Having had over-the-top reactions to the most minute of things for years also means I have had years to develop the skills to prevent, or bring myself down from, an outburst. When facing a challenge, or when things go wrong, I use my learned techniques to stay calm and think clearly. I have discovered such skills are lacking in many children and adults. That differentiates me from them: I try to approach problems with a calm mind and maintain that mindset. Furthermore, when I feel my anger rising, I have learned to walk away and come back later. While I may have managed to conquer a problem and change a behavior, I have an interest that has never changed: history. During one of the long winters in Indiana, I was surfing YouTube when I stumbled upon a video about history. It was far more interesting than anything else I may have otherwise watched. Since then, I have spent much of my free time watching history documentaries, reading non-fiction, exploring museums, or talking about what I have learned. My appetite for knowledge of the past is insatiable, and I greatly enjoy every minute. Moreover, spreading the knowledge to others is equally -if not more- enjoyable. Logically, a career in history is the path I have chosen. For this field, higher education is a necessity. Therefore, in 5 years, I hope to have achieved a bachelor’s degree and be completing a doctoral degree. Unfortunately, many years in higher education costs a lot of money. There is also a lot of potential for waste were I to derail my progress with an angry outburst. But, I, fortunately, work every day to completely eliminate what was once a major issue and now aim to achieve success despite my past problems. Today, I ask for help from the James Andrew Turner Second Chance Scholarship to reach my goal.