I was around 5 when my parents divorced. Like most parents, including mines, it was very messy. Unlike most divorces though, my mother was in the Airforce, she went into the reserves so she could take care of me more since she got main custody over me. She wasn't making enough money, and we were homeless. We lived in East St. Louis inside my father's grandmother's basement. During these times, I was very close to my family members. I played with a bunch of cousins and saw my aunts and uncles every day. My Fathers Grandmothers house was not located in a good area. It was in the projects, so the family I was raised around were also raised in the same projects. I never understood why my mother was so eager to move away from that area, since it was full of family and people I loved. When we did move out, we were couch hopping. Thankfully, my mother got an ROTC instructor job at the University of Illinois. At the time I was angry because I had to leave all my family including my father and go to a new state with my mother. It took time, but I eventually got accustomed to my life in Illinois and we were happy.
That happiness was cut short when my mother was deployed to Afghanistan for about a year. My dad was a few hours away and my mom was in a different country. This is when my mother's mom came from Springfield IL, to take care of me. It was fun being able to hang out with my grandma every day, but it grew old, I was to young to understand the dangers of the world, but old enough to have fear for my mothers life. When she came back, I was happy when she officially came back, she remarried, and had 2 more kids, I had always wanted siblings.
This happiness again was cut short, 3 years later, she got stationed in Virginia. This move was 10 times harder than the first one. I had friends this time that I had known for 3 years. I was moving even further from my father. When we did move, my new school was humongous, in comparison to my old school with only 4 students in the 4th grade, my new school classroom had a max of 28 students. I was scared, but adapted quick, got out of my comfort zone and made new friends that would become my best friends throughout high school and even past high school. In high school, I was always hearing bad stuff happening to my family members in East. St. Louis and it made me realize everything. Moving on was hard, but it was necessary for me to grow. Now grown up, I realized why my mother was so eager to get me out of East St. Louis. I feel so blessed that we had the opportunity that, through the military, we got to move away from a community the did not reflect our life goals for ourselves. I had seen and been through so much and thought it was normal. When in fact it was not. The cousins I grew up with are still in those same projects repeating the cycle. I don't want to turn out like them, where a dying thug or a young gangster is glorified. I want to go to college, I want to be able to benefit my community and make my mother happy.
My mother will retire in October 2024 as a Lieutenant colonel after 30+ years.