Numb. Alone. Hopeless. Contemplating. Those words once defined my entire world. Throughout middle school and into high school, I hung out with a group of guys who weren't the kind of people I should have been around. Deep down, I knew something was off, but I couldn't explain it. When we got to high school, they started drinking and smoking on the weekends, getting high and blacking out. I refused to join in, and slowly I started to feel isolated and alone. My whole identity had been built upon impressing others, doing whatever it took to be popular, to be seen, to feel like I mattered. I was constantly chasing validation. Lacrosse was another place where I found my worth. I am really good, but that only added more pressure. I felt like I had to perform perfectly for my teammates, coaches, and parents. When I had a bad practice or a bad game, I would beat myself up and feel like a failure. The school added even more weight. If I didn't get perfect grades, I felt like I was letting my parents down and would never be good enough. Little by little, this foundation I had built my life on began to crack, and eventually it shattered completely. I felt like I had nowhere to turn, and I was ready to end my own life. I felt like I couldn't talk to my parents or friends. When my mom realized something was wrong, she tried to take me to therapy, but I resisted. It felt like torture every time I stepped into that building. What I didn’t realize was that she understood exactly how I felt. When she saw I couldn’t keep going, she decided it was time to share her own story. She told me that as a teenager, she battled severe depression and even attempted to take her own life at one point. She survived, but she and her family never spoke of it. She continued to carry her pain in silence for years and years. She was determined to break that cycle with me. Also, at this time, I was part of an organization called YoungLife, a ministry for High Schoolers. I couldnt put a finger on it, but something about these people was different. Seeing them so joyful and full of life, I didn't know why or how. I felt seen and heard by people who seemed to genuinely care about me. I soon came to learn this fullness was only available through Jesus. I invited Him into my life, and I was changed forever. Ever since that day, I haven't had to deal with anxiety or depression. I was made new. So, this is my story and what inspires my desire to pursue a career in the mental health field. Next year, I plan to attend Liberty University and am considering pursuing a degree in psychology, intending to become a licensed counselor who works specifically with youth and adolescents. High school is a critical season of identity formation; therefore, also a time when anxiety, depression, and self-doubt often thrive. I want to be a steady, compassionate presence in that space. I am already taking steps toward that calling. Through Fellowship of Christian Athletes and YoungLife at my school, I intentionally build relationships with peers and younger students. Sharing my story and making sure they know that there is someone who understands them completely and will always be available. Through my own experience, I know the most important thing can be simply noticing.

Everyone faces adversity at some point in their life, but my greatest challenge was not something that could be seen from the outside. Throughout high school, I struggled with my mental health while also feeling deeply out of place in my own community. Even in familiar hallways and classrooms, I often felt like I was present physically but disconnected mentally and emotionally. I was surrounded by people every day, yet I felt isolated. I cared deeply about learning, ideas, and meaningful discussion, but I often felt that my interests and way of thinking did not align with those around me. This sense of being different slowly turned into anxiety and self doubt. I constantly questioned whether there was something wrong with me or if I was failing in some way by not fitting in. At times, getting through the school day felt overwhelming, not because of academic difficulty, but because of the effort it took to appear fine when I was not. For a long time, I kept these struggles to myself. I convinced myself that I should be able to handle everything on my own and that talking about my mental health would make me seem weak or dramatic. This mindset only increased my isolation and made it harder to understand what I was experiencing. The turning point came when I began to acknowledge that my struggles were real and deserved attention. I started reflecting more intentionally through writing and by fully engaging with subjects that challenged me intellectually. I also began having honest conversations with people I trusted, which helped me feel less alone and more understood. Over time, I learned that feeling out of place did not mean I did not belong. It meant that I was still learning who I was and what kind of environment allowed me to grow. This adversity shaped me into someone more self aware and resilient. Experiencing mental health challenges while still showing up each day taught me patience, perseverance, and empathy. It made me more attentive to others and more aware that many people carry struggles that are not immediately visible. To anyone facing similar circumstances, my advice is to take your own struggles seriously. Do not dismiss your feelings simply because others cannot see them. Seeking help and speaking honestly about your mental health is not a weakness. Feeling out of place can be painful, but it can also be an opportunity for growth and self discovery. With time, reflection, and support, it is possible to turn adversity into a source of strength and understanding.

My name is Nolan Cruz, and when I started high school, life felt great. I had a group of friends, somewhere to sit at lunch, I was one of the "cool kids". But over time, the guys around me began to change. Hangouts always had to include drinking and smoking, and everyone started to go to more and more parties. I tried to stay relevant and good friends with them but I refused to take part in what they were doing. My parents loved me and would be absolutely devastated if they found out I was doing this stuff or hanging out with people who did. So I stopped hanging out with them outside of school to avoid feeling so awkward or pressured. As time went on, I started to feel more and more isolated, unnoticed, and unappreciated. As my friends kept growing closer I started to feel like an outcast in the group. To everyone on the outside it probably still looked like I was doing great. It looked like I had a solid group of friends, I was the star player on the lacrosse team, I was always laughing and smiling. Nobody could ever know the emptiness I felt inside, but I kept trying to find a belonging or purpose. At the same time all this was going on I started to attend a ministry for high schoolers called Young Life. I was raised in a very Christian household, church every Sunday, worship music always playing throughout the house. I knew all the stories about Jesus but never really believed in Him. In a final attempt at anything I threw up a prayer on the night I was going to take my life and since that night, my life has never been the same. I was able to see what real life looks like, the joy that doesn't come from things this world can offer but from Jesus. The reason I wasn't able to conform or participate in drinking and drugs was because the whole time in the back of my mind I knew there was more to this life and Jesus was always there even if I didn't know it. This changed my life and gave me the opportunity to change and impact so many other people's lives as well. Being able to take on leadership roles in my school's Fellowship of Christian Athletes club has allowed me to reach many people. So other people who also have that feeling that there is more to this life can finally hear what is missing. It has put me in a position to make sure nobody feels or goes unnoticed. I have become a leader in Young Life, doing the same thing, Making people feel seen and loved because that is what people want more than ever right now, to be noticed. My favorite opportunity I have been given is in my county's Capernaum group. A special ministry for teens and young adults with special needs. This was the ultimate opportunity to show love and genuine care to the people who need it the most. I have made so many timeless bonds with friends who were searching for belonging, and I am so glad I was able to help them find it. They have each made an incredible impact on me and I hope they would say the same. I refused to conform with what people thought was "cool" and found who I truly was. I have been given the opportunity to share life and love with others and I am going to make the most of it.

One event that dramatically changed my life did not all happen in a single moment, but across a season where everything I thought I knew about myself fell apart. And for the first time, I truly encountered Jesus. I grew up going to church every Sunday. My entire family was Christian, and I knew all the bible stories. I knew who Jesus was, at least in my head, but I didn't care enough to let Him into my heart. Faith was something I grew up around, but it wasn't something that belonged to me. Throughout middle school and into high school, I hung out with a group of guys who weren't the kind of people I should have been around. Deep down, I felt something was off, but I couldn't explain it. When we got to high school, they started drinking and smoking on the weekends, getting high and blacking out. I refused to join in, and slowly I started to feel isolated and alone. My whole identity had been built upon impressing others, doing whatever it took to be popular, to be seen, to feel like I mattered. I was constantly chasing validation. Lacrosse was another place where I found my worth. I am good at it, but that only added more pressure. I felt like I needed to perform perfectly for my teammates, coaches, and parents. When I had a bad practice or a bad game, I would beat myself up and feel like a failure. The school added even more weight. If I didn't get perfect grades, I felt like I was letting my parents down and would never be good enough. Little by little, this foundation I had built my life on began to crack, and eventually it shattered. I started to spiral out of control; it felt like I was falling into a never-ending darkness of anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. Every day, I would put on this mask that everything was fine, but nobody knew the darkness that haunted me all day, every day. I had convinced myself that I had no real purpose in this world. To me, life was meaningless, and I was just born to die one day. But in the middle of that darkness is where I encountered Jesus, truly, for the first time. In total desperation, I cried out for Him to show me why I exist, for him to give me a purpose, and to change my perspective. To say he delivered is an understatement. He changed my life drastically, bringing people who cared for me spiritually and personally, and gave me a purpose in serving him and others. He filled the hole in my heart that could never be filled by anything this world could offer. I have made it my mission to make sure that others know this as well. This season changed me forever. Jesus gave me an identity in him, purpose, and hope. Something that no amount of popularity, success, or validation could ever give. That is the moment that dramatically impacted my life, and it continues to shape who I am today.

There was a time in my life when faith wasn't just something I relied on, it was the only thing I clung to to survive. A few years ago, I was in the darkest time I've ever known. I was lost, I felt depressed, anxious, and suicidal. I felt like I had nowhere to go, I was born to die, and that was it. That is when I truly met Jesus for the first time. I grew up in church, so I heard about him my whole life, but I never really knew him or had a relationship with him. I continued to pray and read scripture, and every day I continue to grow closer to him. I allowed his presence and love to fill the parts of me that felt empty. I have been living free of depression and anxiety and have been filled with hope and purpose. But faith is not a one-time fix; it is a daily journey. Recently, I have found myself in another season of trial. In the past month, I lost my great-grandma, with whom I was close, my great-grandpa is going through health problems and my aunt was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. Watching them and my family struggle is heartbreaking. It's hard to understand how such a loving and powerful God could allow such pain and loss to his beloved children. This has been a huge challenge for my faith. There are times when I've prayed and felt like God was silent, and that silence can be painful. I've questioned why healing doesn't always come and why good people have to suffer, but even through these doubts, I've learned that faith is not about having all the answers, but about trusting even when the answers don't come immediately or aren't what you expect. I've come to realize that God's plan is far greater than what I can see, and that this life is only temporary. As hard as it is to lose people I love, I find peace in knowing that my GG is now pain-free and filled with incredible joy and peace in the presence of Jesus. Also that my Lolo and Tita are going to be taken care of, even if I cant understand God's masterful plan yet, I can trust that he will pull through and everything will be okay. Through these struggles, I've relied on prayer and faith more than ever. Reading the Bible reminds me that even the strongest believers, like Job, David, and Paul, faced suffering, yet they never gave up on God. It assures me that one day we will leave this world, and every tear will be dried, and there will be no more suffering or sorrow. And finally, that I was made with a purpose and God has a plan for everyone.

When I think of education, it's not just about books and classrooms, but about laying the foundation for opportunity, a strong community, and a fulfilling life. Personally, a higher education would help me pursue my dream of becoming a dentist. Which probably sounds like a strange dream for a 17-year-old, and every time I tell people, I am reminded of the little elf from "Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer". I am not exactly sure what it is that attracts me to dentistry, but I know it will allow me to help others in my community and support my family. My goal in life is to be the first in my family to pursue a career in dentistry. Not just for the title, but to repay my family for everything they have done for me throughout my life. My family has always been very supportive of me and my sisters, giving us good educations, encouraging us through school, and helping us live out our love for sports. So, whether it's cleaning their teeth, providing for them, or just making them proud, I want to give back to the people who gave me everything. I believe the next levels of education can equip me with the tools I need to make this happen. Also, looking forward, I can see how much I will be able to serve others through my profession. Service has always been important to me, a value instilled in me by my parents. Growing up, I was always told to always put others before myself because "many who are first will be last, and many who are last will be first". When I become a dentist, I will serve my community by restoring their confidence and helping alleviate their pain. I want to make dental care something that can be available for everyone. It is often overlooked, but it is essential for overall well-being. Another goal I want to achieve through my education is becoming a good provider for my family, not just financially, but emotionally and spiritually. I want to support my future family by helping them pursue their dreams and ambitions, just as mine did for me. A higher education would allow me to give them stability and comfort, but I understand that wealth and success are not just found in money; it is found in being present, loving, and encouraging. I would say that is my real goal for my future. Ultimately, I see my future as one of service, growth, and purpose. My education is an essential bridge to that future, and will equip me with the tools I need to reach these goals. I want to show that providing for others is more than financial support, but compassion, encouragement, and love. Whether it's my family or people in need in my community, my education will allow me to serve those around me and turn this vision into a reality.