Currently, I am working on getting my Master's in social work. Like many people who decided to enter this field, initially, I thought I wanted to be a psychologist. I knew that I wanted to be that person with the pen and pad scribbling the notes of someone's monolog as they worked through their issue. However, I was unaware that social workers provide 85% of the counseling. When I learned this, I became more intrigued by the profession. I was introduced to the vast diversity of social work and how it could be something I could see myself doing for the rest of my life. The possibilities seemed endless; I could be a military social worker one year, switch to school social work, and maybe even develop my own practice. I appreciate how social work can easily adapt to the ever-changing identity of an individual. I didn't always wish to be a social worker, though. This shift in my story begins in Japan. For as long as I can remember, I have always been interested in Japan. So when my mom told me I could study abroad there, I was ecstatic. Initially, when I set off, I intended to become a chef, but life had different plans. My path changed when a girl I'd grown close to during my exchange confided in me about her suicidal ideations and confessed that she was a part of the LGBTQ+ community. She spoke about how it was easier to talk to me versus the people of her own culture because it was too taboo to speak of. I was glad that I could be of assistance to her. Hearing her talk made me decide to change career paths. I realized that my inherent strengths in communication and empathy allowed me to assist those around me. I want to partake in adolescent-focused groups and help them navigate the trials and tribulations of life. I'm hoping that once my language abilities are higher and I've acquired adequate skills in my field, I can move there to help shift the tide regarding the discussion of mental health issues. I plan to conduct research that will sway their minds to take this matter seriously and recognize it as a national problem. Another goal I have is to do my thesis studying the brains of people with Dyslexia. I have the inkling suspicion that people with Dyslexia may have an increased ability to adapt to and recognize Asian characters. I am dyslexic, as is my brother, and we both had an easier time picking up Asian languages versus romantic ones. I would like to find out why this is the case. If the study reveals what I presume, I will push to have at least one Asian language class available in American schools. I hope this slight edge will enable the students to gain confidence in their intellectual capabilities. I have learned that we build our prisons based on third-grade test scores, and we are aware that not knowing how to read appropriately will lead to an increased risk of falling into adulthood. So hopefully, my study will decrease the number of prisoners. This scholarship would benefit me because it would allow me to complete the second step in my education, and I would be allotted more time to focus on my studies without the added pressures of work. This is something that I have yet to experience. Throughout my undergraduate career, I was encumbered by work. With this scholarship, I'd get better grades and move through this stage more quickly.

I can’t escape the waves of reality you force upon my eyes. Each time I reach outward, you pull me back under Your gravity too steadfast to be opposed Too pompous to be ignored Cosmic dust blinds my glimpse of freedom As you become my sun, moon and stars Each day, molded by your incandescent touch I wonder when I will be able to grasp your luminous core Every planet has its purpose Every star shines, a beacon of rebirth Yet when I stare up at your constellations All I see is pain Your undiagnosed legacy driving your ambitions You, the borderline star. Anxious to prove that you shine the brightest With no regards to the death you so eagerly cling to The complexity of your goal eludes me. Though you claim to be cosmic all I see is darkness All I feel is chaos Though you flow so swiftly, effortlessly enveloping every barrier You still grow dimmer. If this is your aspiration, then is it your purpose to die? Are you meant to sacrifice yourself for the gluttony of the cosmos? She will never be satisfied by your flickering flame So I ask you once, what is there to gain?

Once there was a girl who berated herself when she was down, a girl who only saw the missing pieces of herself and marched throughout the day an empty shell. Though she strived for perfection, she always came up short. She was fearful of the local bully that infiltrated her mind telling her each night that she was not enough. That girl is now a woman. This woman is no longer a lonely, helpless child. She is no longer blatantly exiled in her own mind; she has become content with her cognition, content with the way that she has been sculpted. This is the story of me, Nina Shepherd, a recent graduate from Michigan State University. I think the reason that I attacked myself and my image so ferociously was due to my black-and-white thinking. As I mentioned prior, I kept trying to be perfect. I’d often be trapped between moral decisions, agonizing over each choice, wondering how things would play out. I was paralyzed by the potential realities I saw. In order to navigate this, I dimmed the world into right and wrong, and I was dead set on being right. What led to the change in this mindset was actually my failed relationships. I realized that sometimes things just don’t work out. It doesn’t mean that you or the other person is a villain; it just wasn’t a match. So why couldn’t this be the case in other areas of my life? With this shift in mindset, I was able to transcend the traumas of my past relationships, but my healing didn’t end there. My mental health is something that has always been difficult for me. So much so that I had to take a year off from school just to recollect myself. I often dealt with suicidal ideations and had a tumultuous relationship with the idea of perishing. Though I sought out death and was called to it like a sailor to a siren. I was successful in not dying. The betrayal of my own body allotted me the time to experience the adventure of change; it warped my definition of happiness and stability. I’ve been able to accept the flaws that others may view as problematic and have come to see myself as the sum of all my parts and not merely the ones that are beneficial to others. Due to years of therapy and medication, I have finally reached a stable point, a point where I can be content with who I am and the relationships I choose to participate in. If I had to summarize my growth, I would quote my friend. She stated it so beautifully by saying, “You finally realized that being a human and having human experiences is full of contradictions, and it’s nuanced.” I completely agree with this. The world is full of colors and eliminating them from my perspective merely because I am overwhelmed is a disservice to both myself and the world. There is beauty in the contradictions. Beauty in the broken pieces. Beauty in me. But I think, most importantly, I learned that it’s okay to let go. To release yourself from the contract of your future. To relinquish your ties to people who aren’t okay with the true you, and that moving onward doesn’t equate to abandonment.

Honestly, I think that having a single mother has shaped my entire being. Growing up, my mom was often depressed. I would hear her crying in her room most nights, and I felt it was my responsibility to support her in any way I could especially considering that the reason she was alone was my fault. My parents got divorced when I was one year old. I’m the youngest of three, and I grew up feeling like my birth was the reason that my family had ended. That somehow, the strenuousness of an extra child exasperated the issues that were already deeply rooted in my family. This mindset led me to believe that my existence was a burden to those around me. Thus, I had to alleviate the burden by being more aware of others and their emotions. I had to gain emotional intelligence to serve my mother better. I did this so well, in fact, that I was knighted with the title of “my little therapist” at the age of seven. While, in hindsight, this is a problematic dynamic, whatever little support I could provide her with, I wished to do so; because as long as I’d known her, she’d been alone. The only familial support my mom had while growing up was from her grandparents. She was kicked out at 17 with nothing but the clothes on her back, couch surfing with friends until she made her way to college. With no true support system, it was impressive that she had made it to college, but she also had my brother when she was 21 yet still managed to graduate. Her education didn’t stop there, though. She pushed on to get her master's, then her Ph.D., and eventually her JD. My entire life, she was in school. She showed me that whatever you’re motivated to do, you will accomplish. I think that’s what I admire most about my mom. Her drive, no- her resilience. To me, there was such beauty in her strength; her ambition was intertwined within her very being and her driving force, her children. Having a single mother led me to develop the skills I need for my future career. My listening skills and empathy are unmatched in my family, and I have come to embrace my title of therapist and hope to have the degree to match it. I am grateful to my mother, patient x, for both raising me and relying on me as a human and not only seeing me as something to protect. While I feel like I missed out on pieces of my childhood because I had added responsibilities that typical families didn’t, she would always give me the time and resources to develop my interests and always invested in them. From drum lessons to gymnastics to studying abroad, she made it all happen so that I could excel, so that I could be happy. I’m not sure how I can ever repay her for always putting my siblings and me first, but I’m hoping this essay can be my first installment. I can’t wait to see how she will continue to evolve and influence my life and how I will be able to shape hers as well.

The song I chose is "Little Man" by Chris webby; he talks about how discomfort is an agent of change and a promoter of growth. This song is the only reason I made it through college; it always uplifted and strengthened me during my darkest times. I will analyze my favorite section, the second verse, and discuss how it significantly impacts me. The first bit is: "But don't let it get to you now There's gravity pulling you down Keepin' one foot on the ground Trying to keep you from looking around But look at you now" Almost every time I hear this, I cry. I feel seen by this. Gravity can be one formidable foe; it pins me down with the force of depression and comforts me with a familiar sense of apathy as my world crumbles before me. However, gravity can also be a companion; it gives me a sense of security, allowing me to venture forward. He depicted this beautifully. "But just take it slow Everything is gonna be alright (yeah) Just let it go" This portion greatly empowered me; during my senior year of college, I was forced to take a year off from school for my mental health. When I came back, it was challenging to reacclimate. I expected myself to bounce back immediately and felt like I was failing. However, I had to remind myself that I was okay. I am thankful to Chris Webby for creating this masterpiece. It is my calm in the storm, my gentle reminder of life. Thank you for taking the time to listen to my favorite song and sharing this moment with me.

When it comes to the changes I would like to see on a communal level; I would like to see more Black teachers in the Lansing district. Most of the student population is Black, yet there are seldom teachers who look like them. I grew up in Ann Arbor, a predominantly White and Asian city, and often felt alienated. I hope to serve my Black community by being an example to the Black youth. I want them to see that people that look like them can conduct themselves elegantly in society. Working as a substitute teacher, I have done this on a micro level. One goal I hope to potentially do as my thesis is to study the brains of people with Dyslexia. I have the inkling suspicion that people with Dyslexia may have an increased ability to adapt to and recognize Asian characters. I am dyslexic, as is my brother, and we both had an easier time picking up Asian languages versus romantic one. I want to find out why this is the case. If the study reveals what I presume, I will push to have at least one Asian language class available in American schools. This slight edge will enable the students to gain confidence in their intellectual capabilities. I have learned that we build our prisons based on third-grade test scores, and we are aware that not knowing how to read appropriately will lead to an increased risk of falling into adulthood. So hopefully, my study will decrease the number of prisoners. When it comes to what I would do to change the world, I think about how I would like to lower the suicide rates of adolescents. I would start this in Japan since they have some of the highest suicide rates out of industrial countries. It also holds a special place in my heart, so I would like to start there. For as long as I can remember, I have always been interested in Japan. So when my mom told me I could study abroad there, I was ecstatic. Initially, when I set off for Japan, I intended to become a chef, but life had different plans. A friend I had grown close to during my exchange confided in me about her suicidal ideations. She revealed that she was a part of the LGBTQ+ community. She talked about how she found me easy to talk to and how she found difficulty discussing her troubles with the people of her culture because of how taboo it was. I was glad that I could be of assistance to her. Hearing her talk made me decide to change career paths. I realized that my inherent strengths in communication and empathy allowed me to assist those around me. I want to partake in adolescent-focused groups and help them navigate the trials and tribulations of life. I hope that once I am more capable in the language and have acquired adequate skills in my field, I can move there to help shift the tide regarding the discussion of mental health issues. I plan to conduct research that will sway their minds to take this matter seriously and recognize it as a national problem—especially considering their troubles with the aging population.

I want to be financially free, no longer encumbered by thoughts of how to procure it. I want my children to be untethered. I want freedom.

I appreciate how this question is worded. Rather than just focusing on why mental health is important in a general sense, the way this question is phrased makes me reflect heavily on my personal values rather than what I believe to be politically correct. To me, the importance of mental health reigns the highest priority because I have seen how ignoring this can impact your entire story. Roughly three years ago, I discovered that I had bipolar disorder. Now I chose my wording very carefully once again. I try not to say that I "am" bipolar because I do not want it to become a consuming part of my identity. I am more than my disability, and I need to make sure that cognitively I am aware of that. My life was falling apart when I was diagnosed. I had experienced; suicidal ideations, delusions, paranoia, mania, and much more while trying to undergo the normalities of life. This led to irreparable damage to my personal and financial life; friendships, jobs, and money were lost, never to be seen again. Throughout my episode, I kept thinking, "It'll be okay if I can just make it till (insert arbitrary deadline); then I will get help." I thought I would tackle my mental health issues on my own timeline, but I was blindsided by the illness. Luckily, in the end, however, I regained balance with the help of others and by recentering myself. I guess to me, a flux in mental health is the root of all my troubles which is why I have placed increased importance on maintaining my mind's stability. That is why continuous monitoring and recentering are necessary for me. Since the diagnosis, I have maintained my mental health by taking medication daily and seeing a psychiatrist monthly. I also like to participate in mindfulness activities: meditating, mindfully eating, and showering. When I say "mindfully," I mean experiencing the moment in depth rather than just skimming through it. I usually complete this by turning off the lights, closing my eyes, and thinking about the sensations my body feels, almost like a body scan. I have seen stagnation can trigger me to have some dark thoughts. So I like participating in many recreations and completing a list of daily habits to promote growth. I keep track of and check off my habits daily on my phone and rotate between hobbies, choosing whatever fits my mood best. I often switch between learning languages, creative writing, and video games. Writing and video games allow me to cope and process the emotions that encumber me daily. At the same time, learning languages will enable me to step into the physical realm and work towards my more concrete goal of becoming a polyglot. In general, maintaining one's health is a chore. Throughout history, it has been a goal of humans to prolong our time here on earth for as long as we can. We have come a long way in our conquest to conquer physical ailments and now only need to tame the final frontier, our mind. I have become adept at fighting this battle since I got my diagnosis three years ago. I have found solace in meditation, mindfulness, hobbies, and daily habits. Through these methods, I have gained the reins of my cognition, at least a slight hold, that is. Given time, I hope to discover more about myself and how to use these skills to better navigate society.

I want to create a ripple in the social science field and education system with my research and one-on-one counseling. On a micro level, I would like to participate in one-on-one counseling with adolescents, specializing in people of color. What led to this interest was my exchange in Japan. When I was 16 years old, my mother allowed me to go to Japan for a year to study the language and culture. While there, I heard my close friends discuss how they struggled with mental health issues and had no one to turn to because it was taboo to speak of. They stated that it was easier for them to talk to me about specific issues because they knew that my upbringing differed from theirs. They felt safe sharing details of their life they usually would not share with others because they knew I would not view them under the harsh lens of their country. Thanks to them, I decided then that I needed to do something about this. This led me to study psychology in my undergrad and has piqued my interest in social work for my master's. I admit that my mental health disorder is why I am so intrigued and passionate about this field. Roughly two years ago, I discovered that I had bipolar disorder. I try not to say that "I am bipolar" because I don't want it to become a consuming part of my identity. I am more than my disabilities. I want to promote this change in self-perception and assist people who have battled mental health issues just as I have. In terms of how I would assist the world on a macro level, it would require my research topics. When I found out that we built our prisons based on third-grade reading test scores, I realized that this deficit I had could have altered my life forever. Throughout my life, I have struggled with dyslexia; while in elementary school, I was almost held back. I hope to conduct studies that allow children with this learning disability to find pride in themselves, decrease their chances of incarceration, and believe in their ability to succeed. I hope to accomplish this with my research study on children with dyslexia. In this study, I would like to see if they pick up Asian languages more quickly than the commonly taught romance languages. I suspect that languages that are character based rather than alphabetic may be more compatible with the dyslexic brain. Were the results to support my hypothesis, I would use them to sway education policies and increase Asian languages taught in schools. Theoretically, this would lead people with this disability to fall into crime less and lower the incarceration rates nationally. My experiences traveling abroad, combined with my own personal disabilities, offer me a unique perspective and path to lift others up. I will complete research to serve the world on a macro level. My research will lead to lower levels of incarceration and a shift in education policies. On a micro level, I will continue to impact each individual through one-on-one therapy.

Personally, this is a difficult question to answer. Disney has come up with a plethora of innovative stories; thus, asking me to pick only one character out of them is highly challenging. Alas, I must make a decision, however. My favorite character is Nick Wilde from Zootopia. This is probably not a very popular selection, but I must stick to my gut. I appreciate his character so much because he is very relatable, at least to me. He's a sassy, banter-filled, clever little fox with a dark past that overshadows his eyes and perception. While the main character is blinded by rose-tinted glasses, his are consumed by despair. He sees each person as expendable and only trusts himself at the beginning of this tale. From the beginning of the story, the scary and untrustworthy nature of the fox is portrayed. They are seen as "sneaky" and "deceitful." This stereotype was easy for me to relate to. I was roughly 14 when I saw this movie with my beautiful blonde high school best friend. I felt she was seen as Judy, the sweet, harmless, stupid bunny. While I was left with the gruesome adjectives that most would never like to be seen as. To me, Nick was the embodiment of a Black person. Like Nick, I always had to prove I was worthy to sit at the table, and that I was worthy of having the badge, that I could be trusted. How he was treated when he wished to connect with the people who feared him impacted me significantly. Seeing the trauma he had received at such a young age reminded me of the scars I had thought I had laid to rest. Growing up in a predominantly White and Asian area had impacted me in ways that little me was unprepared for. When people looked at me, they expected the worst. They expected my life to have been filled with trauma and thought I would have become jaded by these experiences, but I was not what they had thought I was. Much like Nick, I was forced to ignore the voices of the onlookers and doubters who would besmirch my name without even knowing me. Those who would take one look at me and decide that I was worth nothing. Nick was the first animated character to have walked the same path as me. That's why I love him.

I find that maintaining one's health is a chore, and it truly is a struggle to constantly fight to prolong one's time here on earth and promote growth. I find some areas more accessible to sustain than others; for instance, when it comes to protecting my mental health, I am a professional. Ever since I got my diagnosis of bipolar, I have been seeing a psychiatrist monthly and have been on medication for the last three years or so. I also like to participate in mindfulness activities, including meditating, mindfully eating, and showering. When I say "mindfully," I mean experiencing the moment in depth rather than just skimming through it. I usually complete this by turning off the lights, closing my eyes, and thinking about the sensations my body feels, almost like a body scan. The physical aspects of my health can fit into my schedule as a student rather well. I use my bike to get to and from school and on campus. When I have the energy and drive, I attend the YMCA in the morning before beginning my day. I like to do workouts focusing on my entire body rather than targeting particular areas. I tend to do rowing and treadmill when I attend the gym alone. However, when a client accompanies me, I alternate between various weight-lifting machines. I also take care of my health by attending regular appointments with my providers, monitoring the changes in my body, and taking notes on my phone. I wish I could sit here and tell you that I am the picture-perfect example of holistic health, but I am not. I ignore nutrition almost wholly. I rarely eat vegetables, do not have a scheduled eating plan, and sometimes I barely even eat once a day. I have created some good habits regarding the other areas of my health. However, truthfully, I have yet to have the time to increase my focus on this aspect of my life. When the time is allotted, I will have the capacity to fulfill this role better. One day, I will eat organic foods, cook regularly, and have a scheduled eating routine. Alas, this is not the reality of my current situation, and I would not dare speak on it as though it was. When it comes to health, I have been repeatedly reminded by both professionals and non-professionals that it is essential to look at your body holistically. Your body is a symphony of teamwork and balance; thus, instability in one area can mess up the entire equilibrium of your unique song. I maintain my health by tackling one area at a time and slowly branching out once I have made a solid foundation. I will continue to practice my routines for physical and mental health while keeping in mind that the fuel for this machine is also a considerable part of the equation. I will become a more balanced individual and look forward to the serenity that comes with it.