When I was young, it was challenging to find a place where I belonged. I constantly felt different from other kids because my body never seemed to align with my mind. At 12 years old, it's socially unheard of to be transgender. But 6 years later, that reality still rests with me, and being a part of the LGBTQ+ community has helped me feel empowered through it all. So many Google searches I conducted to find out what was "wrong" with me. In turn, I found terms that precisely described what I had been going through, and so many people worldwide who felt the same way. People who struggled too. And lived to tell the tale/ One of my greatest experiences with my community happened completely by accident, and I'd love to share it with you. When I was 14 years old, my mom and I had been researching transgender support groups in my area. We found one running support group half an hour away and decided to attend together one night. Although my mom was confused and reluctant, we walked into the room together. However, to our surprise, we had shown up to an adult and elderly transgender support group. I will never forget walking through that room and seeing so many people who had been transgender for years and were all functioning members of society. My mother and I, sat in the middle of people who taught me that what I felt inside wasn't new. Even further, they were incredibly open to giving me advice on navigating my life from this point forward. To my mother, this experience was nothing short of an eye-opener. From this point forward she was able to support me in future endeavors and sympathize with me much more than she did when I came out. Those people didn't have to help me or welcome me into that support group that night. But they did. And because of that, I would love to give back to my community like they did. Even if my community isn't the focus of my career, I owe them everything. In these harsh times, we need support, and I would do anything to help my community. I am about to graduate high school, studying biology, forensic science, and pre-medical studies at a local university while receiving gender-affirming care in my hometown. Being a first-generation college student may be difficult. as my family has never had to support further schooling or loans before. I think scholarships will be able to provide the foundation for my dream of going to college and having a stable career like my role models never did. My mom always told me that she had dreams too, just not enough money in this world to achieve them. It's the horrible truth, but I want to be able to fight that: standing up for my true self, one stepping stone at a time.

Forensics has always been something that intrigued me, even as a small child. My mother always shrieked and shuddered when I would chat on about wanting to become a detective, saying that “those kinds of jobs are way too dangerous”. Of course that possibility had crossed my mind, but it never quenched my love for investigation. How does our brain direct every part of our body down to microscopic neurons like a CEO that never breaks a sweat? How does our body work together and expend energy to keep us alive for an average of eighty years? However, there has been one thing that piqued my interest over all of this: death. Sounds morbid, I know: but even though death and the unknown that follows is a big fear of mine, investigating the circumstances behind death has been one of my dream fields to study for a long time. Again, my mom is mouth agape about me wanting to do autopsies in the future, but it is so interesting to me. Not only do I want to investigate how someone died or how one little thing going wrong in the cycle of our bodies can cause catastrophe, I want to give families closure. There are millions of people murdered across the world day by day, and one thing that loved ones out there want to know is if their child or spouse or friend was taken from them by another person. The field of forensic pathology gives so much light into solving suspicious cases and serving the community, no matter if people think it’s “gross” or a weird thing to be interested in. Someone has to do the work, and I know I wouldn’t mind it at all. Currently, I’m taking a forensics elective to finish up my senior year of high school. We haven’t done much yet, but I am on the edge of my seat about what I’m going to learn! I’ve already taken anatomy, I’m halfway through AP Psychology, and I’m taking criminal justice. When I tell you that I cannot wait to see what else is in store for me to learn: I mean it! I cannot wait for what my future holds in this field of knowledge and work, and I more importantly can’t wait to show the world what I’m made of: for my community, for justice, and for the magic that happens behind closed doors.

Bad grades always bothered me. However, I never thought that I would become accustomed to them, like nothing mattered. I’ll never forget the feeling of dread that housed itself deep in my stomach when I saw my grades drop.. This wasn’t reflecting the work I wish I was able to put in. It wasn’t reflecting the person I wanted so badly to be. And it was all because of wanting to be someone else. Before and during freshman year of high school, my weight began to plummet, and so did my grades. I felt distanced and alone, especially given the circumstances of 2020, but I thought my physical appearance being as ”perfect” as possible would make me feel better. It would get society to praise me. I would be that one person with looks to die for and high grades that attracted the attention of everyone around me. But unfortunately that is nowhere near how things turned out. Things took a turn for the worse. I could no longer think straight. My hair fell out in clumps and I was barely able to walk or stand for long periods of time. I knew I had to help myself before it was too late. Before there would be no future for me and my academic dreams. Before I could no longer be here to help others. I spent most of my high school career simultaneously holding a job, keeping my grades together, and recovering from anorexia without any outside intervention. It’s been 4 hard years since then, but I have made so much progress and I’m almost ready to begin my college career. I dream to be a forensic pathologist, conducting autopsies to give families closure about their loved ones and solve mysteries between life and death. Looking death in the face has taught me that death for others must be thoughtful and acknowledged: after all, it is something we all will experience someday. Through my adversity I will never stop working to serve my community and the people I care about most. Obstacles will always come my way, and I sure have observed that time and time again. But I know now that there are so many amazing things waiting in the world for me, and all I need to do is jump over the hurdles of life and keep running. My community is counting on me, and I can’t wait to show the world what I can do.