Breast health, an often overlooked aspect of women's well-being, has become a focal point in my life due to a deeply personal experience. As a mother, I have encountered the challenges of breastfeeding, and through my journey, I discovered the profound impact that breast health education can have on the lives of women. This essay delves into my difficult breastfeeding experience, emphasizing the significance of breast health, and articulates how my experience influenced my awareness on the way to becoming a professional counselor. My experience with breastfeeding was marked by challenges that left me feeling isolated and overwhelmed. When my daughter was born, I was eager to embrace the joys of motherhood, including the intimate connection that breastfeeding provides. However, reality struck when I encountered difficulties that I had not anticipated. The pain, frustration, and emotional toll of struggling to breastfeed led me to a pivotal realization – I was not alone in this journey. Amidst my struggle, I sought support from various sources, including lactation consultants, support groups, and online communities. Connecting with other women who had faced similar challenges not only provided practical advice but also a sense of camaraderie and understanding. This support network became a lifeline, helping me navigate the complexities of breastfeeding and reinforcing the notion that breast health is a shared concern among women. The Annie Pringle Scholarship resonates deeply with my experiences and aspirations. Annie's multifaceted contributions to the breast health community, coupled with her legacy of uplifting and supporting others, inspire me to pursue higher education in breast navigation. As I reflect on my challenging breastfeeding journey, I am motivated by the belief that access to knowledgeable professionals and education can significantly alleviate the struggles faced by women in similar situations, impacting overall well-being. My journey as a mother has deepened my understanding of the interconnectedness of women's health and the importance of a supportive community. My ambition is rooted in the belief that knowledge is a powerful tool for positive change. The drive to overcome personal challenges and empower other women fuels my passion for breast health advocacy. As a future counselor, I am committed to providing comprehensive care to clients, which includes mental and physical health. Clients who face breast cancer, for example, quite often are in need of support and help to face their existential givens, such as death, isolation, and meaningless. Thus, my awareness and ability to provide education about breast health will be crucial knowledge for my professional practice. That is why this scholarship, with its focus on supporting students in the pursuit of knowledge related to breast health, aligns perfectly with my ambitions. In conclusion, my journey through the challenges of breastfeeding has illuminated the crucial role of breast health education in fostering a supportive and informed community of women. The Annie Pringle Scholarship provides an opportunity to not only honor Annie's legacy but also to further my commitment to breast health advocacy. In my case, I would use this scholarship to continue my education in group facilitating with the use of an existential counseling approach. As soon as I get my degree and am able to enter the workforce, I will be able to apply my knowledge in my local cancer center, where there are groups for woman who face breast cancer and are in need of a skillful professional who understand the importance of breast health for their lives. Through my experiences, I have developed the ambition, drive, and passion necessary to make a meaningful contribution to the breast health community and, in turn, uplift and support others. This scholarship represents more than a financial aid opportunity; it is a chance to continue the legacy of a remarkable woman by actively engaging in the pursuit of knowledge for the betterment of women's health.

Life has a profound way of imparting lessons that transcend the ordinary, and for me, that lesson was embedded in the courageous battle against colon cancer fought by my beloved grandmother. As I reflect on her journey, I am compelled to acknowledge the transformative impact it has had on shaping my values, ambitions, and the way I approach life. My grandmother's diagnosis of colon cancer marked the beginning of a challenging and emotional chapter for our family. Witnessing her navigate through the tribulations of this relentless disease was not only heart-wrenching but also enlightening. Despite the pain and uncertainty, she faced each day with an unwavering determination to live fully and make the most of her diminishing time. Her resilience became a beacon of strength, illuminating a path for me to follow. As a high school senior navigating the tumultuous waters of adolescence, my grandmother's battle became a profound source of inspiration. Her fight instilled in me a deep appreciation for life and an understanding of the fragility of our existence. It was a stark reminder that every day is a gift, an opportunity to embrace the richness of life and make a meaningful impact. The experience of witnessing my grandmother's gradual decline fueled a sense of urgency within me to value every moment. Her struggle taught me that life's brevity necessitates a conscious effort to live authentically and purposefully. This realization propelled me to take existential responsibility for my own life, prompting me to explore my passions, set ambitious goals, and strive for continuous self-improvement. The profound impact of my grandmother's journey extends beyond a personal awakening. It has cultivated in me a deep sense of empathy and compassion for those facing adversity. This newfound understanding has fueled my desire to contribute meaningfully to society, not only as a tribute to my grandmother's legacy but also as a reflection of the strength and resilience inherent in every individual touched by the hardships of life. I decided to become a mental health counselor. In pursuit of my professional aspirations, I want to empower those grappling with the existential givens of cancer—death, freedom, meaninglessness, and isolation. I aim to provide tailored guidance, fostering resilience and a renewed appreciation for life. Inspired by my grandmother's profound approach to life's existential challenges, I am steadfast in my commitment to extend this transformative wisdom beyond the realm of illness. My existential counseling seeks to resonate with individuals facing diverse life challenges, enabling them to reclaim control over their narratives. In empowering my clients, I aspire to guide them towards a renewed sense of purpose, embracing life's uncertainties with resilience and a profound appreciation for their inherent strength. Together, we embark on a journey to unlock the potential for growth, self-discovery, and a meaningful existence, transcending the limitations imposed by life's formidable trials.

In the intricate tapestry of my life, the threads of motherhood, immigration, mental health, career aspirations, and sacrifices weave together to form a narrative that mirrors the challenges faced by countless women. As a mother raising a child in two immigrations away from family, grappling with postpartum mood disorders and suicidal ideation, and navigating the tumultuous journey of entrepreneurship along with legal restrictions of my vocational path, my experiences have been both daunting and transformative. I married a Mexican man and was excited to explore Mexican culture and raise a child in my new family. Although this decision was courageous, it was an isolating choice, too. As the demands of motherhood intensified, I found myself grappling with the dual challenge of providing emotional stability to my child while adapting to the unfamiliar terrain of a new culture and new identity of mine. I became a wife and a mother, but I lost my personality parts of being a daughter, a friend, and a colleague. I had to carve out a new support system from the community around me and let the new "me" spring. In the aftermath of childbirth, the shadows of postpartum mood disorders and suicidal ideation cast a long and harrowing pall over my journey. The internal struggle to reconcile the joy of motherhood with the overwhelming darkness within was a battle fought in silence. However, it was through seeking professional help, opening up to loved ones, and acknowledging the importance of mental health that I emerged from this darkness. This experience instilled in me the resilience to face adversity head-on and the determination to create a nurturing environment for my child and for myself! I decided to show my love and care to myself as I do to my daughter: I chose to follow my old passionate dream and embarked on the entrepreneurial venture of opening a bakery. However, life had other plans, and the need to prioritize my husband's career led to the painful decision to close the doors of my bakery. This experience taught me the art of sacrifice, resilience in the face of setbacks, and the ability to adapt to unforeseen circumstances. New immigration placed new limitations on my way: I do not have work permission in the US. I was again forced to let go of the recently emerged parts of my personality and discover new ones. This continuous process of introspection and the need to find resilience along with resources to reshape myself inspired me to pursue a Master's in Counseling to support others facing similar challenges in the modern world full of ongoing changes. This choice to reclaim my professional journey represents not only a personal triumph over adversity but also a commitment to supporting others in their journey toward mental well-being, as well as a desire to role-model to my daughter that personal goals and desires are worth pursuing! In conclusion, my journey as a mother, immigrant, and aspiring counselor is a testament to the transformative power of perseverance, resilience, and the pursuit of one's passion. Balancing work and caregiving has not only shaped my career goals but has imbued them with a depth of understanding and empathy that can only be forged through lived experiences. The challenges I have faced have become stepping stones, and through this scholarship dedicated to extraordinary women like Jennifer, I hope to further my education, make meaningful contributions to society, and serve as a pillar of strength for my family and those I aim to support in their own journeys.

From a young age, I have been drawn to the intricate workings of the human mind, fascinated by the resilience of the human spirit in the face of adversity. Growing up in a close-knit community, I felt that something was missing in our communication, lifestyles, and existences. This hunch made me feel that "I am the only one who feels it" or "Something is wrong with me." When I grew up, went through therapy, and am now studying MS Counseling at Prescott College, I realized what that feeling was: a resistance to acknowledge the dark side of human experience. That was the cause of the silent struggles that many faced with mental health, often hidden behind smiles and laughter. That is why I am passionate about contributing to the well-being of others by helping them embrace the dark side of their lives and continue with their journey rather than feeling stuck or falling into the abyss due to the inability to overcome the struggle. I grew up in a small Russian city where keeping "the face" and "honor of the family" was a primary goal for social survival. The price my community and I paid for it was neglecting and disregarding personal feelings, emotions, and thoughts. We have been together in the boat of loneliness because the stigma did not allow us to connect genuinely, to connect through pain, sorrow, or grief. We have been expected only to look and contribute to the bright future of everyone; there was no place for personal "defects." The more I study mental health, the more I recognize that various cultures stumble to deal with the dark side of human experience. Society is afraid of it and, as a result, tries to avoid it and stigmatize it. That is where plenty of DSM diagnoses take place. That is why I will aim in my career to work with the foundation of the mental health crisis our society is experiencing right now by the method my favorite K-pop group, The Rose, offers: "Take me to the dark Take me to my sorrows And the shadows I'll face it Take me from the dusk." As an international student who studies online and part-time, I am cut off from various financial sources of help. If awarded this scholarship, I plan to use the funds to cover tuition costs of First-Responders intensives offered by my College to deepen my empirical knowledge about work with acute cases. I am committed to personal growth through introspection and in-vivo exposure that stimulates my analytical brain to weave theory with real experience. That is why I hope this scholarship will help me to take the intensive and enrich my counseling knowledge to become a skillful mental health professional.

From May 2021 I moderate the comment section at Facebook Russian online group of support for mothers with postpartum depression "CAREFUL WITH YOURSELF". It´s been already around 112 dedicated hours that help me to keep sanity in my motherhood experience. "You are ok and not alone with your dark moments of life" is my capstone from this service. In June 2021 I joined SEEDS OF HOPE and for more than 32 hours I helped to take care of the community garden. I used this time as my personal meditation: working directly with vegetables, trees, dirt helps me align with nature and find way back to inner peace. Also, I am volunteering for Hot Lunches project of SEEDS OF HOPE since November 2021. Even 12 hours working on community kitchen deeply impacted me. Hearing the stories of currently homeless people I understand how many more steps should be taking by government, society an each individual in order to reach social justice for those who are in need. In April 2021 I joined Mesquite Recycling club of Casa Grande. Since our city does not recycle anymore the trash I helped to sort plastic, tin and aluminum cans for more than for 43 hours. We raised and donated more than 9458 dollars to local Food Bank. I learned that even small actions of individual can bring valuable result for someone outthere, such as dinner on a table in our case. In 2014 I worked 96 hours as a team leader in bobsleigh track at Winter Olimpic Games in Sochi. I was responsible to coordinate and provide customer service to spectaculars. The most significant take away from this incredible experience of my life was that details matters to people. They give special touch to marvelous memory about an event. The years 2012 and 2013 I worked as a volunteer in AIESEC ( International Association of Students in Economics and Management). I was involved as team memeber and team leader at various projects main goal of each of them was to send russina people to international volunteer internship or to host foreigners in Moscow while they accomplish their volunteer projects. What I am majorly grateful to this experience is for the prove of an idea that there is no real borders across people from different cultures. If I keep my mind open and free from prejudices than people will enrich me with their different opinion and backgrounds. As an OA (Overeater Anonymous) member since febrary 2021 I lead the meetings, buy literature for the group, share pamphlets about our fellowship in local venues, and stay in touch with other members. I believe these 149 hours of service helps some people to recover from eating disorders and others to find a new tool to deal with their struggles. As for me I am a witness of the principle how extended hand of help benefits the life. There is all the time someone who does care about me, I just need to accept this help. In January 2022 I created and lead the discussion club "Teapot" for free in the local library. The main goal of this initiative is to practice critical thinking and to broaden outlook by examining famous quotes through the various prisms of different opinions. It is been only 1 hour of meetings but I am sure it will fulfill me with great insight in the future. With the heart full of gratitude am very happy to give back to my community for all the goods and boons I have in my life.

My curriculum for MS Counseling includes a lot of reading. Since English is my second language my reading speed is low and it takes a lot of translating, additional googling, and time to understand the material. To help myself out with it I deducted a routine with specific rules. For examples: -silent phone located in a different room or a bag in the other corner (if I study in a library); -no food around, just water (since I am a compulsive eater, snack during the study process distracts me); -written plan of study that should be measurable and realistic (read 5 pages, write 1 essay). My mind is easy to distract so I use Pomodoro technic and for the brake walk outside to breathe fresh air that benefits my brain and calm down my swarm of thoughts. Also, walking or stretching helps to release tension from my body and study longer in a static position without severe pain consequences. While reading I am tracing the sentence with a pencil in order to avoid chaotic jumping in other chunks of passages. To help myself understand better the material I rewrite in my own words difficult ideas or thoughts. Then I share them in my Telegram channel with other counselors in order to provoke a discussion that will help me to elaborate more on the topic and obtain different opinions which enrich my comprehension. I search for movies, podcasts, or interdisciplinary conferences about the material I study with an eye to get more practical use of theoretical knowledge and examples in real life and thereby complement the picture of the topic.

31 of December is my favorite day of the year because is the time when I update my bucket list. It is been numerous wishes that became reality in a miraculous way, such as: -become a friend with a writer. The same year I put this idea on my list my family moved in into a new house and guess who is my neighbour?! -to hear Hanz Zimmer's music performed by a professional orchestra. In 2 years I saw by accident an advertisement for the movie "Gladiator" streaming in a theater with an accompaniment of the symphonic orchestra. Checked! However, most of my wishes require more than just a bit of luck: -get MS Counseling from a US university. Took me 8 months of preparation but now I am an enrolled student at Prescott College; -run my own business that makes people happy. 1 year ago I had my own crepe cafe that had 4.9 out of 5 ranking at Uber Eats. Took a lot of courage and hard work to operate it alone, take care of the house and my 3 years old daughter at the same time; -Eurotrip with my best friend. The price for that the most amazing trip in my life was 6 months working on 3 jobs! The new year is coming and even more bold wishes are gonna be added! Here are some of them: -to be filmed at Hollywood movie; -participate in Pole dance competition; -get done my remission for eating disorder; -raise 55000 dollars in scholarships to cover my tuition; -dedicate the year to strengthening my self-confidence; -improve the quality of my rest time; I do not have a clear plan for all of my ideas but I am sure the road will be mastered by the walking one!

As an OA (Overeater Anonymous) member, I lead the meetings, buy literature for the group, and work currently on sharing pamphlets about our fellowship in local venues. I believe this service helps some people to recover from eating disorders and others to find a new tool to deal with their struggles. I created and lead the discussion club "Teapot" for free in the local library. The main goal of this initiative is to practice critical thinking and to broaden outlook by examining famous quotes through the various prisms of different opinions. On a volunteer basis, I actively moderate the comments section in the Russian Facebook group "Careful with yourself", which is dedicated to mothers with post-partum depression. By doing this I help women with difficult mental state receive needed support and advice in a non-toxic way. As a volunteer of the Mesquite Recycling club, I help the local group sort plastic, tins, aluminum cans. After this trash is sold earned money is donated to the food bank of my city. I also participate in two volunteer programs of Seeds of Hope: Community garden and Hot lunch. I help to grow vegetables in the garden which can be shared with the homeless or consumed by any citizen in need. From time to time I go to help with serving hot lunches to people in need. All this experience helps me to give back thanks for all the goods and boons I have in my life.

The journey of my life is inspired and driven by the desire to "legalize ordinary life path". Currently, I am pursuing a degree in Mental Health to become a professional counselor in order to later accomplish my life mission approaching it from 3 different positions. 1. By having private practice I want to help my clients find their own definition of success and shape their life around their core values and targets rather than the ones that mass media is implying on us in today's world. 2. As a professor by teaching in a university I want to support the growth and development of a new generation of counselors with whom together we can help our society to see the value of an ordinary lifestyle that can bring the same benefits and goods to the world as a modern success story examples that, unfortunately, built on drama, trauma and high price in the mental health of that individual. 3. To run a creative cafe as a safe harbor from "successful perfectionism with high standards" where people can: -obtain valuable and broadening outlook knowledge from projects that promote mental health, critical thinking, social diversity and to become a part of them if they want so; -meet like-minded fellows; -rest, eat and have fun just to enjoy their lives! To sum up, the mark I want to let by my life experience is a tendency for people to honor their authentic path and feel value and importance in each day of their life.

The first time I heard about the concept of active listening was during my personal therapy which I used as a lifebuoy because I was drowning in my post-partum depression. My counselor was not giving to me an array of homework or a bunch of new technics for self-help, however, I noticed that my darkness was constantly draining, session by session. The reason for this miraculous effect was the active listening of my therapist. For her, my cryings, complaints, tangled thoughts MATTERED. I could see and feel that she did listen to me and did HEAR me. It literally helped me to see and strengthen my self-confidence, I started to respect my thoughts and speak up more often. By being witnesses of benefits from active listening I start to apply this technic to my relationship with family and friends. When I talk to them, I pause my outside life and focus on their words, activating my empathy to understand what they feel. Sometimes we may start arguing and being an active listener for me means that I would really try to see the opposite arguments from my opponent's point of view. I ask a lot clarifying questions, I use rapport technic to bond with my interlocutor, I answer through I statements. The results were not long in coming! My relationship with significant others deepened. I start to understand better my husband and we learned to resolve our disagreement in a fast and respectful manner. The quality of time I spent with my daughter increased and my mother instinct honed because I understand better what is going with my kid by simply genuinely listening to what she is saying to me.

My family constantly repeated that education is the light in my life. Honestly, at that time I did not understand what they really meant by saying this. Spending my precious time learning about some irrelevant events from the past or complex math that I probably would never use was not looking to me as a light in my life, it was more like a dungeon that actually hid me from the real world. Anyways I went to pursue my Bachelor’s degree because at that moment living in Russian I understood that without a degree the doors to high-paid jobs would be closed for me. I was accepted at one of the top universities in Moscow and moved from my small town to my new life: a new social network, new work, a new place to live. I expected to get the knowledge about my future profession, a fancy diploma and probably some good friends. But what I really obtained from this 4-years educational journey was much more. First of all, I was exposed to an array of different opinions from people with distinct backgrounds. It helped me to broaden my outlook and start percept the world as quite a melting pot where is no one-side answer such as "this is right or wrong", there is a complexity and depending on which prism I use to look at it different answers will appear. Secondly, it was inevitable to consume tonnes of information. Thanks to professors who pushed me to analyze it using my critical thinking, I learned how easy information in today's world can be twisted, facts misplaced, or interpreted in a favor of someone's opinion. This experience helped me to work with any data I get cautiously, filter it based on my values and needs, and take it neutrally rather than being emotionally influenced by clickbait names or catastrophizing tone. Because of the competitive environment at my university, I realized the painful truth: the world outside does not wait for me, either I go for what I want, or I stay on a sidewalk watching how others pass towards their goals. I saw the difference between people who have brilliant ideas but waiting for the perfect time to come, better conditions to be, and most importantly, someone who acknowledges their genius and helps them to accomplish the plan. Usually, they graduated still being trapped in their dreams and no one was coming to rescue them. And there were others, who were taking small steps no matter what, regardless if nobody believed in them or their ideas if they had a honed plan or sources to execute it. They made their moves first and the world was responding, never the other way. To sum up, I would say that my education helps me to stand solid on the ground of reality, with clear from prejudices mind, and acting on life rather than reacting to it. I no longer look at the world from categorical angles and complain about injustice or hard life conditions, more like I accept it in the way it is and make my path through it using what I have got. In the end, I came to agree with my family: education became a light for my life journey guiding and supporting me in our hectic and diverse world.

I am a bit disagree with the idea that in order to find the motivation to work hard and achieve your goals, you need to be passionate about what you’re pursuing. I agree that we need some kind of fuel to do so but the source of this fuel maybe be different from the topic of your interest. At least that is what works for me. My passion is pole dancing. My life interest and main goal at this period of life are promoting mental health among modern society and elaborating on new ways to treat eating disorders. To keep working hard on this goal I need my pole class - my moment of flow. The time when I reconnect with myself and my brain works in a diffused mode to come up with some new fusion of unraveled tangled thoughts. I deliberately do not want to make my pole dance experience a career choice or life goal, because I want to keep this pleasure intimate, as a source of inspiration and creativity rather than a conveyor obliged to squeeze new ideas to earn money or meet deadlines. I call it free passion because it is free from any kind of my ego desires, expectations, fear to be rejected or acknowledged by society. It is just for me, for my pleasure. And because of that free of conditions experience, I can pursue my life goals being emotionally empowered by my passion, and not having fears to drop my life`s work being overwhelmed or burnout by precisely the same field of my interest.

One of the most difficult periods in my life began when I immigrated to Mexico, got married, and gave birth to my daughter less than within a year. At the first glance, these events look exciting, but for me this adaptation was hard. I understood that I had too much on my plate when I was crying on the floor and thinking about suicide. Each day I woke up with the determination to behave differently: not to scream at my daughter, exercise, and not binge on food, but every night I finished crying and hating myself for being so weak. I tried a bunch of quick fixes: yoga, self-help books, online marathons to become a super mom, running, starting an online project with friends, and so on. But to no avail! I was tired to pull myself out of the mud as Baron Munchausen. I was still tearing myself apart with such questions as: “Am I mentally sick or just hysterical?”, “Am I a sugar-addicted person or just have a lack of willpower?”, “Am I doing something wrong or I am just a monster-mother who should never have had kids?”. I was losing hope to get better. But I did not want to give up either! I wanted to find a different solution rather than just overdosing on sleeping pills. That is why I reached out for a therapist. With my counselor, we started to work on my sleep deprivation, eating disorders, and post-partum depression. The storm did not pass right away but I learned how to swim in it. Now, drawing on this experience, when I have my meltdowns, I convince myself to take one more step, to keep searching for the solution, keep calm, and persevere. No rain - no rainbow.

In order to show love to people who are important to me I learned an easy but powerful trick: do for them what they really like and want rather than what I would like them to do for me in similar situations. Now I am taking off my husbands' socks before he goes to sleep even if I believe is weird and would be happy to give him a massage or cup of tea instead. For his BD I am taking him to a cheap taco place and not baking a cake or celebrating at a fancy restaurant. To my daughter, I am reading, again and again, her favorite beloved book Splat the Cat despite the fact that I already hate it. Recently we dropped the gymnastic class because she said she did not want it anymore and I chose to honor her will and show her that I love her and accept her decision even if I did not agree with it at all! With my friend, I became a better listener. I give her space and time to talk about what really matters to her right now and truly put attention to what she is saying. I started to ask more often questions such as "what gift you would like to?", "How can I support you now?" and then help to sit with a kid while my friend takes a nap, buy a favorite wine instead of flowers, and go on a walk without talking because that is what she needs at the moment. Thanks to these changes I could light up the bond with my friend, root the connection with my husband, and bring more joy into my relationship with my daughter.