When I was thirteen years old, my dad took his own life. Before this horrific event in my life occurred, I had no idea what the term “mental health” meant. This experience in my life heavily influenced my mental health, beliefs, relationships, and aspirations as it was the hardest thing I have had to endure. Since losing my dad, I have struggled with mental health myself. I was diagnosed with both depression and anxiety my sophomore year of high school. Having to learn how to manage my anxiety and depression has been a long, hard process. I have attended therapy for the past five years and been on medication for the past three years to help manage my mental wellness. My experiences with mental health have heavily impacted my overall beliefs. I believe that taking care or your mental health is the most important form of self care. In the beginning stages of grieving my dad, I desperately wished that he had reached out for help. Because of this reason, I am a strong believer in asking others for help in times of hardship. I belive that a small gesture, such as a smile, can save someone’s life. I also believe in bringing as much awareness to mental health and suicide prevention as possible. It took the loss of a loved one to suicide for me to learn what mental health is. Personally, I believe that we as a society can do better than that. Therefore, I would like to do my best to be there for others and inform them on what mental health is. To begin this, I have learned the method of QPR to do my best to help others who may be having suicidal thoughts. My relationships have also been heavily impacted due to my experiences with mental health. Since the battle of losing my dad, I have had many ups and downs. I have learned that those who have stuck with me through these hard times are my real supporters in life. After the loss of my dad, I grew even closer to my mom, three sisters, and my brother. We came together as a family and did our best to get through the loss of my dad. Since I was little, I have always had a passion for helping others. The loss of my dad solidified this, as I did all I could to be there for my family. I want to use my compassion and empathy to help other people through times of hardship and absolute devastation. I would like to pursue a degree in nursing to help others. I would also like to begin a non-profit organization one day to help bring awareness to mental health and suicide prevention. I want to do all that I can to save someone else’s life as well as another family from grieving their loved one to suicide. Mental health is very important, as it is a base structure for our lives. My personal experiences with mental health have heavily impacted my beliefs, relationships, and career aspirations. Since the loss of my father to mental health, my main purpose has become to help others as well as myself fight the adversity of mental health.

It was a hot, sunny day in July of 2019. My three sisters, mom, and I were at a community park when my mom received a call from an unknown number. As my mom was talking on the phone, an expression of horror appeared on her face. A coroner contacted my mom and was on her way to the park. My heart began racing as I wondered what had happened. Fifteen tremendously long minutes of dread and wonder dragged by. Thoughts of who had passed away and what had happened raced through my mind. Eventually, a silver minivan pulled up to the picnic table my family was gathered around. An older woman and a younger man got out of the vehicle. Looks of despair rested on their faces. They nervously walked to the table, looking as though they were about to deliver terrible news. Looking back now, in that moment, I didn't realize how much my life was about to change. The woman shared the news that at around 11:00 that morning, my dad had taken his own life. My insides churned and my mind went blank. A rush of tears began gushing down my face. A loud, gut-wrenching scream exploded from my mouth. I couldn't hold back the tears. My life was changed forever. My dad was born in Sheridan, Wyoming. He had an older brother and a younger sister. Growing up he loved working on the family ranch and playing football. In his senior year of high school, his football team won the state championship. After high school, my dad attended Casper College. He then transferred to the University of Wyoming. After receiving his degree, my dad moved back to his hometown where he met my mom. When my mom was twenty-seven and my dad was twenty-eight, my parents had me. They then had my three sisters. The thirteen years that I knew my dad were some of the best years of my life. My dad was an amazing person. He loved helping me with basketball and taking me out riding on the ranch. He had the most contagious smile. I have yet to meet someone with a smile as beautiful as his. At any given time he could walk into a room and light it up. He worked very hard to take care of my mom, brother, sisters and I. My dad was my best friend and my biggest role model. Losing my dad to suicide has been the hardest experience I have ever been through. Not a day goes by where he doesn't cross my mind. The loss of my dad has been a hard, long journey. I have had to learn how to manage anxiety and depression due to the loss of my dad. I have also learned that over time, grief comes and goes in waves. I have noticed that when I reach milestones in my life, things get a little harder. I am a senior in high school this year and I wish nothing more than for him to be here with me again. I have had to accept the fact that my dad will not be here to watch me graduate high school. He will not be there to walk me down the aisle. He will not watch my three sisters and I grow older. Although losing my dad has been a terrible, traumatic experience, I find peace in knowing that one day I will see him again in heaven. I know that as I write this essay, he is looking down on me with a big, proud smile on his face.

The summer between my junior and senior years of high school, I got into a car accident. I faintly remember waking up in the emergency room. I was surrounded by several nurses who were taking care of me. There were cords attached to my body and a brace around my neck. I was scared and confused about what had occurred. The nurses around me were very calming and compassionate as they kindly explained what had happened to me. They reassured me that everything was going to be okay. At this moment, my dream of becoming a nurse became solidified. I realized that I could have lost my life if it weren’t for the nurses who were there helping me. Because these nurses made such a huge impact on me and my life, I want to do the same for others. Ever since I was little I have had a passion for helping others. I want to use this passion of mine to give back to others. Though several challenges come along with being a nurse, I am willing to face them to positively impact others' lives. As a nurse, I hope to contribute to my community in a variety of ways. I want to provide people with excellent healthcare and ensure that people look forward to going to the doctor. I would also like to form connections with all patients that I work with. By doing this, I will help contribute to a positive work environment that patients enjoy coming into. I want to form an environment where people want to learn and ask questions about their health. I would like to do this to make all patients that I work with feel like they are being well taken care of. I also want to inspire others to achieve their dreams and show them that no matter what hardships they come across, they will get through it. I would also like to use my positive spirit to make a difference in the lives of others. With my knowledge of healthcare, I would also like to help people reach their personal health goals. Furthermore, I would like to inspire others to take care of themselves and their health. I will strive to provide people with knowledge on healthcare, so they reach their full potential. I would like to do this to improve the lives of others. Overall, becoming a nurse would be a very rewarding experience. I truly believe that nurses are some of the strongest people in the healthcare industry. Nurses' ambition, kind-heartedness, and positive spirit are all reasons that I strive to be a nurse one day.

When I was thirteen years old, my dad ended up taking his own life. Before he passed, I didn't know a single thing about mental health. Looking back now, I realize how important my mental health is. The loss of my father taught me that mental health is not something to be taken lightly. Taking care of ourselves and others is so important, especially in the world we live in today. I believe that my mental health is important because it is the foundation for a long, happy, healthy life. As harsh as it sounds, the death of my father taught me that if I didn't take care of my mental health, I could end up like he did. Losing my dad was one of the hardest things in my life. When I lost him to suicide, I realized that I didn't want anyone to lose me in the same way. Given this, I believe that my mental health is so important because I want to stick around for those I love. Although days can be long and life can be hard, I strive every day to push past my demons. I have struggled with depression and anxiety throughout my high school career. There have been days where I didn't get out of bed. However, I don't let my anxiety and depression get the best of me. To maintain my mental wellness, I do a variety of things. One of these things is attending therapy. Therapy has been the biggest tool for me while learning to manage my mental health. Having the opportunity to speak to someone is very beneficial in managing and processing my feelings. While in therapy I have found a variety of coping skills to help maintain my mental wellness. I draw, read, color, exercise, and listen to music to help maintain my mental wellness. All of these things serve as outlets for me to relieve my stress and sadness. I also am on medication that helps me manage my anxiety and depression. Without all of these things, I would struggle to manage my mental wellness. Often times, I think that mental health is misunderstood. I think that society has built a stigma that there is shame in reaching out for help. I would strongly argue this. I hope that everyone can learn and grow to realize that there is no shame in maintaining your mental wellness.

The summer between my seventh-grade year and eighth-grade year my dad passed away. A year went by and my mom decided that our family needed a fresh start, a new place to heal and grieve. The summer between my eighth-grade year and freshman year my family moved from Sheridan, Wyoming to Peoria, Arizona. Then my sophomore year of high school, my family moved from Peoria, Arizona to Bridger, Montana. Me and my three younger sisters would all become labeled as the new kids at new schools not once, but twice. I went from a graduating class of around 300 kids in Wyoming to a graduating class of around 550 kids in Arizona to a graduating class of 10 in Montana. Though moving two times in my life has been hard, it has heavily impacted my life, friendships, and future goals. Moving has heavily, yet positively, impacted my life as a whole. I have had many amazing experiences and met many amazing people while being labeled as the "new kid". At first, being labeled the new kid was hard. It had a heavy impact on my confidence and self-esteem. I became very self-conscious and felt like I lost who I was as a person. Moving schools caused me a lot of anxiety and stress. I was scared that I wouldn't make any new friends or live a normal high school experience. Although being able to stay in one high school throughout my high school career would have been comforting, I am happy that I have had the hardship of moving schools. Being the new kid has pushed me out of my comfort zone and made me a better person overall. I have learned that I can do anything that I put my mind to and that I am a very strong person. Leaving my friends behind was one of the hardest parts about moving and becoming the new kid. Moving has shown me who my true friends from my hometown are. I have also had the amazing opportunity of making new friends. Moving to a new school allowed me to meet my best friend, Seannah. Becoming the "new kid" has also had an impact on my future goals. I have learned that there is a lot more out in the world than my small hometown of Sheridan, Wyoming. I strongly believe that if I never moved out of Sheridan, Wyoming as a new kid, I would have never left. Becoming the new kid in high school has also prepared me for college. At a younger age, I had to learn how to adapt to uncomfortable situations. I had to learn how to make new friends and navigate a new environment. Qualities such as these will be amazing for my future career in nursing. Overall, being labeled as the "new kid" can be one of the hardest yet rewarding experiences. It made me a stronger, more confident person. I would not change the fact that I have had to move as a kid because it has shaped me into who I am today. I have gained confidence, dedication, and a sense of purpose since I have had to face the challenge of becoming the "new kid".