Mental health is deeply personal to me, both as a student and as a nurse. My awareness of its importance did not come from textbooks, but from lived experience. While I was in nursing school, my father passed away unexpectedly. Shortly after, I found out I was pregnant—a moment that, despite everything, was a very joyful part of my life. However, navigating grief while preparing to become a mother made it impossible for me to complete the nursing program at that time. I petitioned to continue the following semester, but my request was denied. In the midst of that setback, my grandfather also passed away. That period of my life was marked by overwhelming loss, uncertainty, and emotional strain, and it was the beginning of my own mental health challenges. I was experiencing anxiety attacks and syncopal episodes while in class and clinical. Years later, I lost my youngest brother to suicide—something I never saw coming- and it destroyed our lives. A few years after that, I lost my last brother unexpectedly to what was labeled an accidental drug overdose. In my heart, I believe his passing was also rooted in silent mental health struggles that went unrecognized and unspoken. I have a dark sense of humor and say they just wanted to be together. My brothers and I were ever close, I imagined we would grow old together. These losses have shaped how I view mental health—not as an abstract concept, but as something that can profoundly impact individuals and families. I have learned that mental health directly affects focus, motivation, and the ability to succeed. There were times when continuing my education felt overwhelming, yet I persisted. Returning to school after significant setbacks required resilience, determination, and a willingness to confront both grief and self-doubt. That persistence reflects not only academic strength, but emotional endurance built through adversity. My journey has also influenced how I advocate for mental health in my community. As a pediatric nurse with over two decades of experience, I see firsthand how early mental health challenges can go unnoticed or be dismissed. I am committed to changing that. I openly advocate for mental health awareness in both clinical and personal settings, encouraging conversations that reduce stigma and promote early intervention. I am especially passionate about addressing the stigma surrounding mental health in Hispanic men, where cultural expectations often discourage vulnerability and seeking help. Advocacy for me also begins at home. I make it a priority to have open, honest conversations with my daughter about mental health. I want her to understand that asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. By normalizing these discussions, I hope to empower her—and others—to speak up before struggles become crises. In addition to personal advocacy, my professional goals reflect this commitment. I am currently pursuing my Master of Science in Nursing to become a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner, with plans to obtain certification as a Pediatric Primary Care Mental Health Specialist. My goal is to integrate mental health screening and support into routine pediatric care, ensuring that children and families are seen, heard, and supported early. Mental health is important to me because I have seen what happens when it is overlooked. I have experienced the devastating consequences of silence, stigma, and missed opportunities for intervention. At the same time, I have witnessed the strength it takes to continue moving forward despite loss. Through my education and advocacy, I am committed to being part of a more compassionate, proactive approach to mental health—one that encourages open dialogue, supports those who are struggling, and ultimately saves lives.

Unexpectedly losing my youngest brother to suicide reshaped my world in ways that are difficult to fully articulate. As a suicide loss survivor, I have faced a complex mix of grief, confusion, guilt, and unanswered questions. I saw no signs, and that reality has been one of the hardest truths to accept. As a nurse, I felt like I should have recognized something—anything—that could have changed the outcome. That belief left me carrying a profound sense of failure, along with a deep, dark hole in my soul that I am still learning to navigate. Unlike other forms of loss, suicide leaves behind an unrelenting search for “why,” a question that often has no clear answer. In the early stages of grief, I found myself replaying moments, conversations, and missed opportunities, wondering what I could have done differently. This kind of grief is not linear; it comes in waves, sometimes unexpectedly, often tied to memories or quiet moments. I have learned that healing does not mean forgetting or moving on, but finding a way to carry the loss while still choosing to live with purpose. Watching how this loss shattered my mother and deeply affected our entire family has forever changed me. It revealed how far-reaching the impact of suicide truly is—how it ripples through every relationship, every shared memory, and every future milestone. This experience has deepened my understanding of both love and loss, and it has strengthened my commitment to compassion. A difficult truth in my journey is that I have not yet fully reached a place of self-forgiveness or healing. Despite my clinical training, I continue to struggle with the belief that I should have identified warning signs. While I am gaining insight into the often unpredictable and concealed nature of mental health crises, internalizing that understanding remains a work in progress. This loss has also highlighted the persistent stigma surrounding mental health in Hispanic men, where cultural norms may discourage help-seeking behaviors, reinforcing my commitment to advocacy and awareness. I feel a strong responsibility to help change that, starting at home by having open, honest conversations with my daughter about mental health and the importance of asking for help and the signs to look for In order to be able to help someone. This loss has also shaped my purpose. I feel a strong calling to become a mental health advocate, particularly in pediatric populations and families who may be silently struggling. I plan to pursue my Pediatric Primary Care Mental Health Specialist certification so I can better identify early warning signs, support families, and contribute to prevention efforts. I want to be part of the change that encourages open conversations, reduces stigma, and ensures that individuals feel seen and supported before they reach a crisis point. Resilience, for me, has not meant being untouched by grief, but continuing forward with intention. Hope has returned gradually—in meaningful conversations, in supporting others, and in recognizing that even in profound loss, there can be purpose. While the pain of losing my brother will always be part of me, it has also become a driving force behind who I am becoming. My journey as a suicide loss survivor continues to evolve. I carry both the weight of my loss and the responsibility to use it for good. Through advocacy, education, and compassion, I hope to honor my brother’s memory and help prevent other families from experiencing the same heartbreak.

My decision to pursue higher education at this stage in my life reflects a journey shaped by experience and a renewed sense of purpose. When I first began attending community college many years ago, I knew I wanted to become a Pediatric Nurse Practitioner. However, life took several detours, and after earning my RN, I never truly believed I would return to pursue an advanced degree. My focus shifted to raising my daughter and being the best mother I could be. I was determined to give her stability and opportunities I did not always have, especially when it came to education. I wanted to ensure she would never have to worry about how to pay for college the way I did. Over the past two decades as a pediatric nurse, I have grown not only in clinical skill, but in perspective. Caring for children and their families across both everyday encounters and high-acuity situations has strengthened my understanding that nursing extends beyond treating disease—it centers on advocacy, building trust, and supporting patients and families in the context of their unique circumstances. These experiences have brought me back to my original goal, but now with greater clarity, purpose and tenacity. Serving as a charge nurse, mentor and pediatric clinical instructor for a local college has allowed me to mentor new nurses while continuing to grow myself. These experiences have shaped my core values: compassion, accountability, resilience, and a commitment to lifelong learning. They have also made it clear that I want to contribute at a higher level—one where I can influence not only individual patient outcomes but also broader patterns of care in my community. A defining influence in my journey has been witnessing the growing need for accessible pediatric mental health care. I have seen children present with physical symptoms that mask deeper emotional struggles, and families unsure of where to turn until a crisis occurs. As I pursue my Pediatric Nurse Practitioner degree, I also plan to obtain my Pediatric Primary Care Mental Health Specialist certification. This will allow me to integrate mental health screening and management into primary care, promote early intervention, and advocate for improved access to pediatric mental health services within my community. My career goals are rooted in serving my community, where many families face barriers such as transportation challenges, limited access to specialists, and socioeconomic constraints. I plan to use my education to provide comprehensive, accessible pediatric care that addresses both physical and mental health needs. My commitment to community service has been built through years of hands-on patient care, mentorship, and advocacy. Advancing my education will allow me to expand that impact in a more meaningful and sustainable way. I want to be part of the solution to critical gaps in pediatric care, particularly in mental health access and early identification. After completing the program I would like to be an advocate for local mental health organizations. This scholarship is essential to helping me achieve these goals. I am currently financing my education while also supporting my daughter’s college tuition, which has created significant financial strain. This support would allow me to continue my education without interruption and focus fully on my academic and professional development. More importantly, it would enable me to continue serving my community at a higher level. At this stage in my life, I have the experience, resilience, and clarity to fulfill the goal I set years ago. I am pursuing this degree with intention—to improve access to care, advocate for pediatric mental health, and make a lasting impact in the lives of children and families in my community.