I was twelve years old when my father died. It was nothing that my family ever could've expected to happen to us. I didn't know what was gonna happen next, but my mom never let us doubt that she would always take care of us and support us. When I was growing up, it was difficult being around other kids who would talk about all of the things they would do with both of their parents and the cool experiences they had with their fathers. There were so many times were I would find myself getting jealous that they had all of the things I dreamed I could still have. Knowing I would never get to create any more memories with my dad felt like a punch to the heart. Being so young and having no one to relate to my experiences was difficult and often lonely, but it also helped me to cherish the time I had with my mother. It made me realize to be grateful that I still had such an amazing parent in my corner. My mom knew that things were hard for us, so she tried to do things with us to help us still feel like kids. I know there were many moments when my mom was scared or unsure of how to do things, but she never let us worry. Today I look back on so many moments in my life and it makes me appreciate my mom even more. Going from a married mom to three kids to a widowed mother to three teenagers in such a short period could not have been easy for her. Anytime we have a disagreement or anything like that I like to remember that it is her first time living too. We all make mistakes and we're all trying to figure out life for the first time. It puts into perspective who I want to be as a person. My mom is such a strong, loving, and caring person. She would give anyone the shirt off of her back if they needed it and despite all she's gone through that has never changed. Because of this, she has been someone who I've constantly been inspired by and been in awe of. In my day-to-day life, I try to put into practice all of the things she's taught me. Her love and support are something I will always cherish and take with me wherever I go.

Growing up, I was always taught to help and be there for others. My parents were great examples in showing me that helping out was not only for the sake of other people but that it was also very rewarding for yourself. Just knowing you can better someone's life, even in a small way, is something that can have you feeling so fufilled. There were many times when I would see both of them go out of their way to assist others and they never expected anything in return. It inspired me to want to be just like them. My mom would tell me how it was always a wonderful feeling to be able to use what you have to help other people. When she said that, it stayed with me and made me wonder how I could do the same. I remember one year in school there was a classmate of mine who was having difficulty with their math work. I didn't live too far from them, so we decided to set up a time and day for me to help them work on it. Math is something a lot of people have trouble with, so I made sure to let them know that it was okay to ask for help and that I would do my best to help them understand the lesson. Once we began, I made sure to keep away all distractions, like electronics, so that way I could have 100% focus. I did my best to slowly explain the lesson and made sure to pause if they had any questions. After the first lesson was finished, I felt good about helping a classmate to be able to feel confident about their work. Once the grade came back on the paper, I was so ecstatic to find that they'd passed! We scheduled another study time and continued doing that anytime they felt they needed some extra clarity or assistance on an assignment. I'm so glad that I had an opportunity to help someone else. Being able to help someone is an amazing feeling. Not only is it rewarding, but you set a good example to others also. A few years later I saw that same classmate excelling at math and helping others with their assignments. They were in all of the honor classes and were even taking some college courses. It was truly an incredible experience.

I love reading. I especially love reading romance. I was always a hopeless romantic, but no love story ever made me quite as happy as the one between my mom and dad. In my eyes they were soulmates, and we had the perfect family. Then one day in April when I was 12 years old my family got the shock of a lifetime. My father had been killed in a head-on collision by a driver that was under the influence. The pain of losing him felt unbearable, but something I remember vividly was that every day my mother got up in the morning and took care of me and my siblings. No matter how hard things were she always did everything in her ability to make sure that we were taken care of. I can't imagine how hard it must have been for her to go from raising her kids with the love of her life to then being a grieving widow raising three grieving children all on her own. She was incredibly strong and resilient despite all that was happening in our lives. I, myself, was having difficulty understanding how something like this had happened to us. Suddenly I found myself unable to talk about my father because it was just too painful. Everyone else in my family seemed to do it with such ease, but I never could. I never talked about my feelings or how anything affected me because I didn't want anyone to worry about me. It wasn't until a close friend of mine told me something that changed those feelings. She told me that if my dad could see me today that he would be so proud of the person I've become. She said that he also wouldn't have wanted me to hold everything in and he would've wanted me to be happy. I knew she was right. I wrote an essay for school about my dad and how what happened affected me and was able to gain the courage to show it to my mom. She was emotional and told me that it was okay for me to feel the way I felt and that I was allowed to grieve at my own pace. After 5 years of struggling, I was finally able to talk about my dad. There was always this sense of guilt that I held for not being able to, so when I finally did it was such a relief. I know that he would be proud to know that I've found something that I'm passionate about and want to pursue. In the future, I want to be able to help others to find joy and inspiration with the power of words. I would love to work in a library someday. That is my dream. I know that no matter what I have the support of both of my parents with me.