Mental health is something I have always found important, not just because of me but because of others such as friends, family, and peers. I didn't have quite the normal childhood like others might've. Growing up I didn't have the proper attention a child should've. Adopted by my grandparents, my grandpa was always In and out of my life so I never could quite settle to a father figure until I met my best friend Cadin, his dad would treat me like his own, and I finally got the love from another person I would call dad. Sadly he would end up passing away due to kidney and liver failure, after being there for me from ages 8-12 I would finally face life's biggest challenge. Mental health, I started to go through a phase of not wanting anything to do with people or accepting the proper help I needed and had an I'll do it myself mentality. By age 14 I started to listen to other people talk about their problems and I would give them advice on how to face and how to go about the situation, but in the back of my mind, there was a voice screaming for help but useless vocal cords unable to speak up for me. Eventually, the people I considered friends started facing issues and it took a toll but I hated seeing people hurt so I would sit and listen so they knew someone cared. By age 15 I was facing bigger problems and started to think about taking my life I knew other people were counting on me to help them but the thought that always stuck with me was what about me? I always wondered when someone would notice or come to help but I knew it wasn't gonna happen because I wouldn't speak up because I always compared it and would tell myself there were people out there who have it worse than me and I could possibly be rejected by others so I kept quiet. I eventually found a friend I would finally talk to about my mental health and how I was struggling he accepted me for what I brought to him and I showed thanks for it but sadly he would take his own life on January 28th, 2024. Finding this out hurt more than anything, I had finally hit my breaking point and made up my mind. January 29th, 2024 I would be signed out of school for "sickness" I went home and my parents left for my grandma's doctor's appointment, I went down stairs grabbing whatever I could find in our cupboards, and threw 2 handfuls of pills back setting the bottles back shaky I went upstairs to lay down and go to sleep so it could be painless. I woke up at 8:30 throwing up with a migraine and the smell of rubber lingering in my nose, I would eventually need to be taken to the doctors for throwing up and I'd lie and tell them I just couldn't keep anything down. A few weeks later I worked up the courage to tell my parents I needed help, I was put In therapy where I would finally open up about what I held down. I started telling my friends to seek help when you need I would still talk to them but I would also push for them to seek professional help. What I learned is that it doesn't matter what background you come from everyone struggles and it's okay to ask for help

Growing up in church as a kid I always heard the word faith I didn't realize how much this word would really matter to me. At the age of 11 I found myself praying for my friends sister and telling them to have faith that she'll get better my friends sister was facing leukemia cancer, I didn't really know a lot about his sister but I knew enough to know her sickness silenced are town. My brothers were friends with her and I seen the impact it had on them sadly she passed in the summer of 2020 July 12th. I questioned the word faith and belief. Someone I considered a grandma or what I would call her was nana she was my best friends grandma, She always brought a light to the room she always told that I reminded her of herself able to make people smile and offer kindness she always pushed me to do better and keep having faith in myself she would tell me she had faith in me so why couldn't I have faith in myself and I never had the answer for her, she cheered me on when I achieved what I was reaching for. But sadly September 12th 2023. she passed in her sleep due to a stroke, I received the call from my best friend in shock I didn't feel anything in that moment. Eventually the funeral was a couple days later and I was talking to the adults and giving her kids (my best friends mom and uncle and aunt) my condolences, when I was stopped by aunt Ashley where she would tell me nana was just talking about me the day of her passing and that she told them to believe in me and just give me time because I was acting the way she was when she was younger and i'm still a teen and going through maturity phases, when I heard that it made me believe in myself and keep what faith I had in myself in my heart because I knew I was going to do better for her and push myself to my limits for her. for the next few months I was on the basketball team and I was going through body issues with my back, spine and ankles, I had been praying to get better and had faith in getting better so I was using my faith to push myself to do better and not give up. For the next couple weeks I would workout my body and strengthen what was hurt, eventually I recovered and was able to play and help my team. But along the course one my friends noticed I was going through things and he had worries because we were talking less, he texted me asking about what was going on I explained how things with the loss of other people were taking a toll on me, he told me to pray and keep my strength not even a month later he would take his life January 28th 2024. I found out the news and had been broken by it, he wasn't selfish and put others before himself. It took a toll on me but I had went through are messages a couple weeks later seeing that word faith, I finally found the courage and strength to open up to an adult and get professional help. writing this November 10th 2024 not only do I live for him and others but also live in faith.

I am pursuing the career of a motorcycle technician. From a young age I had an interest in vehicles learning about them and remember being a kid in the back of my father figures(Mike) truck naming vehicles and him correcting me if they were wrong he would tell me the right names of the vehicles. Eventually I stood by Mikes side handing him tools or holding a flashlight for him nothing to hands on but I remember it being super interesting and eventually asking to help with the bigger jobs and he had agreed to let me. One day he brought me to a car show and I seen this cool motorcycle Yamaha R1 2015 a dark blue color, he had asked the guy to rev it so he did that was the first thing that had sparked interest for motorcycles for me, over those couple weeks from that once interaction I had kept talking about motorcycles and asking questions to Mike about them and he would answer and he had eventually told me stories about how he used to ride and how their dangerous and he stopped riding because of that, I told Mike I would get a bike eventually and it wasn't gonna be a "slow" one, he didn't shut the idea down instead he acknowledged it saying we would build one together when I was older. Near 2020 Mike had gotten sick and it was getting progressively worse and I understood that we wouldn't be working on vehicles anymore or sharing that interest, eventually the sickness caught up to him landing him in the hospital, sadly April 23rd 2020, Mike had passed due to kidney and liver failure. I was 12 and I felt lost without Mike and I no longer had a passion for fixing cars but I held on to my love for motorcycles, I still had big plans to fix bikes and build a bike in honor of him. by the time I was 14 I understood bikes inside and out, by the time I was 16 nothing was more exciting then hearing a motorcycle rev, I had eventually had a conversation with my parents about getting a motorcycle but they explained bikes were to dangerous and they didn't want me having one yet or even later in the future. Hearing them talk about how having a motorcycle is dangerous brought me back to the words of Mike explaining he quit because he even thought the same but never shut down the idea of getting a bike just would tell me risk. By the time I was 17 I held on to the passion for bikes admiring the bike and the detail one would put into their own bike. I started to get more hands on with bikes and learning more about bikes, I started to find a little happiness in it and I would always hold on to the thought of Mike when talking to me about motorcycles. Whether it was fixing somebody else's bike or owning mine I would make sure to hold myself to mine and Mikes idea.