For my whole life I felt this huge stress all the time, I experienced huge waves of stress that would take over my days and sometimes weeks. I couldn’t figure out if I was just worse at dealing with stress than my peers or if I was experiencing more stress than others for no reason and in turn making me weak. This feeling of overwhelming stress would make me unable to sleep, pushing myself to get one more assignment done or one more task done in the hopes that I would be able to ride the wave of stress to its crest and be in calm waters. It never happened though. I had a tumultuous home life with an abusive father and an emotionally unavailable mother, where I was unable to look to my parents for help in controlling this stress. I spend my childhood trying to push stress down and move forward in the hopes that it would get better. I made it through high school and college, but not without intense breakdowns that would debilitate me and only further compound on my stress. I felt completely alone, I was unable to articulate how I was feeling to others. I had been suffering and constantly fighting suicidal thoughts and didn’t feel that it was worth living life it this is how it was going to be. At twenty-five I made a joke to my partner about my stress and they said it was anxiety. I was shocked, how could I have gone twenty five years without realizing that my stress was extreme anxiety? I had been to therapy multiple times, in high school and in college and no one ever said “this is anxiety,” I thought that I just had to power through. Pushing through my difficult days completing tasks so I had a sense of accomplishment and the impression of power over my “stress.” I reflected on all the times I was unable to power through and the breakdowns I had leading to intense shame, anger towards myself, and sadness which only caused more stress. I met with a psychiatrist and explained how I had been feeling my whole life and I was prescribed Wellbutrin, I started taking it and everything changed. My outlook on life completely shifted, I was able to relax and started to enjoy my life. I spread the benefits of medication to everyone who will listen, sharing how my life improved once I had a diagnosis and a real treatment plan. I had patience and compassion for those around me and my relationships improved greatly. I was able to be present with my friends, family and partner, making all of our lives better. I wasn’t sure if I was going to make it to my thirtieth birthday and now I am just a few months away because I was able to get help and a life saving medication. I am forever grateful for those who came before me and made this medication available.