I think the the best way to live a long, healthy life, is by maintaining your mental health. When I was 14, I developed an eating disorder which resulted in me having to be taken out of school in order to go to the hospital, and eventually an eating disorder treatment center called The Emily Program. Being taken out of society and deprived of social relationships negatively impacted me, and made me think of myself as worthless, and alone. Because I thought so little of myself, I did not care about my own health or wellbeing, which led to years of a rough recovery since I did not want to get better. As I learned to love myself again, I have been taking better care of myself, and exercising and eating in a healthy way. I firmly believe that in order to live a healthy life you must have a good mental health in order to believe that you deserve to be healthy.

In my ideal life, I would be married with a few kids, along with a lot of pets: bunnies, dogs, fish, and hamsters. I would be working at a crime lab analyzing forensic data that was retrieved from crimes, and I would be volunteering at my local animal shelter. Since I am extremely passionate about Just Dance, I am hoping to buy the newest version of the game each year it is released, and continue to win many tournaments. I would like to get a lot of tattoos, including a tattoo of my fish Finley who sadly passed in 2018. Additionally, I will continue to dye my hair crazy and unique colors, and do my makeup to match it. However, while I have all of these goals that I am hoping to achieve, the main thing that I want in my dream life is happiness. While my happiness would likely equate to all of these things, I would have to ensure that I am happy before I focus on other things. Overall, my dream life consists of all the things that I love in order to ensure that I am happy when I am older.

The song that most inspires me is Cake by Melanie Martinez. When I was 14 I developed an eating disorder, and despised myself to the point where I wanted to die. Throughout my recovery, I turned to this song because it made me think that I was worthy of more than I thought I was. The lyrics, "I'm not a piece of cake for you to just discard", helped me feel better about myself because they allowed me to think of myself as something that was deserving of more than to just be discarded. Additionally, I would listen to this song while I ate meals and snacks, because it helped motivate me to eat so that I could recover. Cake helped me realize that I deserved to recover, which was ultimately enough to motivate me to keep going in such a dark time. Eating disorders destroy how one perceives themselves, so for someone suffering from one to want to recover because they realize that they deserve to recover really helps defeat the illness.

If I were a highly influential figure, the main thing I would stand for is body positivity. When I was 14 I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa, and was on the brink of death. While having to gain back the 20% of my body weight that I lost, I was completely isolated from the outside world, and could only communicate with my family and doctors. I hated my body to the point where I would rather die than be fat, and I believe that was the reason I had lost so much weight. While body positivity would not cure all eating disorders, I firmly believe that it would help prevent many people from having to go through the same thing that I went through. If I could use my platform to help just one person, it would be enough for me. Every body is beautiful, and I would encourage people to love themselves instead of trying to change themselves to be like others.

Something that I love about myself is my ability to stay positive in nearly any situation. When I was 14 I was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa, and was on the brink of death. While having to gain back the 20% of my body weight that I lost, I was completely isolated from the outside world, and could only communicate with my family and doctors. Despite being alone and scared, I still was able to remain positive and fight my illness. I would push myself to get better by convincing myself that I am strong and worthy of love, and that things could only go up from the mental state I was in. I found that my mindset saved my life, because I was able to recover physically in half a year, and mentally in 3 years. While I will likely never be completely free from my eating disorder, the voice in my head telling me to stay positive completely overpowers my negative thoughts, and that is what I love about myself.

Independence is not something that others can give you; it is something you must earn yourself. To me, independence is being able to take care of yourself without needing to rely on outside help. As a 17 year old, I am not able to be fully independent. I do not have the same rights as adults, and I must acquire the help of my parents to thrive in society. While I am not yet independent, I am taking steps to become so. I'm attending a community college for nearly all my classes, and I worked for 9 months to be able to afford gas for my car. While being independent does not equate to how successful you are, it is essential for personal development to be able to care for oneself in the case if they were ever alone one day. Additionally, independence has taught me that everyone is free to think for themselves, and does not have to conform to a specific group. In America, people usually put themselves into one of two categories: Democrat or Republican. However, since everyone is independent to think for themselves, I have found that more and more people are able to see both perspectives, and pick different subjects that they agree with from both sides. Overall, independence is what sets you apart from others, and is essential for the diversity we have in our country, in addition to allowing people to care for themselves.

The only thing I truly desired when I was 14 was to be skinny. I had been bullied by my "friends" throughout middle school, and I had no one to turn to tell me that I wasn't worthless. After months of restriction and rapid weight loss, I was admitted to Rainbow Babies and Children's hospital where I was not allowed to walk more than once a day. I would try to run away, as if each step I made was one step closer to being accepted by my peers, but each time I was brought back to my hospital bed. Even throughout my recovery at the Emily Program, I despised myself. I would slice my arms and thighs believing that dying was my only escape from being fat. I had been told by numerous doctors that it would only get easier after weight restoration, however that was not the case for me. After not being in school or talking to anyone my age for the first semester of my Freshman year, I was thrown into a completely new environment all by myself. Words can not describe how petrified I was each day at my new school. Every morning I would get sick several times due to my anxiety over how my peers viewed me, and I had many panic attacks over the remainder of the year. I would cry and beg my parents not to make me go, though none of my efforts ever worked. While I can't define exactly what helped me get to the place I am today, I can say that my hard work and willingness to get better played a huge part. On top of school and still recovering from an eating disorder, I had started therapy, and motivated myself to make friends—something a socially awkward person like me always had trouble with. Getting better does not happen overnight, and it took years for me to get to a place where I can confidently say that I love myself. Throughout my recovery, I had made many new friends who also had struggled with their mental health in the past, and even my own boyfriend who struggled with addiction. My mental health had improved so much over the years that I could experience things I could have never before: eating fried chicken at the dock while cuddling with my boyfriend and watching the sun slowly disappear below the horizon, wearing a crop top while throwing my body around every which way to score perfects in Just Dance, and most importantly being able to talk about my story without being ashamed of who I am. Because of my experience, I plan on majoring in biology in college as I would like to be able to help people who are struggling with their mental health; since I believe that everyone is capable and worthy of recovery and I would like to help anyone who is struggling achieve that. Throughout restoring my mental health I have found my life's purpose: to help others who are struggling with mental health recover so that they can enjoy life as much as I—and many other survivors—have.

When I was in the hospital for anorexia nervosa—my life in the hands of doctors that I had never met—I was beyond scared; though I wasn't scared of my heart which was dangerously close to stopping, or my arm which was practically a pin cushion with how many needles I had in my skin throughout my stay. I was only scared at the reality that I would have to gain back all of the weight I had lost and more. I had a hard time finding things to be positive about in my situation, but through my stay I realized that it is the little things in life that truly brought me happiness. After receiving many letters from my worried sisters and grandparents, I found that their funny notes which showed me how much they cared about me were the only things that kept me going. Whenever I wrote back to them, I would always have a radiant smile on my face that ended up shining in the letters I would have my parents bring home to give to them. I believe that the only reason I had any motivation to get better was through the light I was able to see in my family's writing, and the happiness those letters brought to me in such a dark place. Now, whenever I see that one of my friends is having a hard time, I always try to do something small such as sending them a funny picture, or telling them how much I care about them because I know the importance of bringing a smile to someone's face.

The only thing I truly desired when I was 14 was to be skinny. I had been bullied by my "friends" throughout middle school, and I had no one to turn to tell me that I wasn't worthless. After months of restriction and rapid weight loss, I was admitted to Rainbow Babies and Children's hospital where I was not allowed to walk more than once a day. I would try to run away, as if each step I made was one step closer to being accepted by my peers, but each time I was brought back to my hospital bed. Even throughout my recovery at the Emily Program, I despised myself. I would slice my arms and thighs believing that dying was my only escape from being fat. I had been told by numerous doctors that it would only get easier after weight restoration, however that was not the case for me. After not being in school or talking to anyone my age for the first semester of my Freshman year, I was thrown into a completely new environment all by myself. Words can not describe how petrified I was each day at my new school. Every morning I would get sick several times due to my anxiety over how my peers viewed me, and I had many panic attacks over the remainder of the year. I would cry and beg my parents not to make me go, though none of my efforts ever worked. While I can't define exactly what helped me get to the place I am today, I can say that my hard work and willingness to get better played a huge part. On top of school and still recovering from an eating disorder, I had started therapy, and motivated myself to make friends—something a socially awkward person like me always had trouble with. Getting better does not happen overnight, and it took years for me to get to a place where I can confidently say that I love myself. Throughout my recovery, I had made many new friends who also had struggled with their mental health in the past, and even my own boyfriend who struggled with addiction. My mental health had improved so much over the years that I could experience things I could have never before: eating fried chicken at the dock while cuddling with my boyfriend and watching the sun slowly disappear below the horizon, wearing a crop top while throwing my body around every which way to score perfects in Just Dance, and most importantly being able to talk about my story without being ashamed of who I am. Because of my experience, I plan on majoring in biology in college as I would like to be able to help people who are struggling with their mental health; since I believe that everyone is capable and worthy of recovery and I would like to help anyone who is struggling achieve that. Throughout restoring my mental health I have found my life's purpose: to help others who are struggling with mental health recover so that they can enjoy life as much as I—and many other survivors—have.

The only thing I truly desired when I was 14 was to be skinny. I had been bullied by my "friends" throughout middle school, and I had no one to turn to tell me that I wasn't worthless. After months of restriction and rapid weight loss, I was admitted to Rainbow Babies and Children's hospital where I was not allowed to walk more than once a day. I would try to run away, as if each step I made was one step closer to being accepted by my peers, but each time I was brought back to my hospital bed. Even throughout my recovery at the Emily Program, I despised myself. I would slice my arms and thighs believing that dying was my only escape from being fat. I had been told by numerous doctors that it would only get easier after weight restoration, however that was not the case for me. After not being in school or talking to anyone my age for the first semester of my Freshman year, I was thrown into a completely new environment all by myself. Words can not describe how petrified I was each day at my new school. Every morning I would get sick several times due to my anxiety over how my peers viewed me, and I had many panic attacks over the remainder of the year. I would cry and beg my parents not to make me go, though none of my efforts every worked. While I can't define exactly what helped me get to the place I am today, I can say that my hard work and willingness to get better played a huge part. On top of school and still recovering from an eating disorder, I had started therapy, and motivated myself to make friends—something a socially awkward person like me always had trouble with. Getting better does not happen overnight, and it took years for me to get to a place where I can confidently say that I love myself. Throughout my recovery, I had made many new friends who also had struggled with their mental health in the past, and even my own boyfriend who struggled with addiction. My mental health had improved so much over the years that I could experience things I could have never before: eating fried chicken at the dock while cuddling with my boyfriend and watching the sun slowly disappear below the horizon, wearing a crop top while throwing my body around every which way to score perfects in Just Dance, and most importantly being able to talk about my story without being ashamed of who I am. Because of my experience, I plan on majoring in biology in college as I would like to be able to help people who are struggling with their mental health; since I believe that everyone is capable and worthy of recovery and I would like to help anyone who is struggling achieve that. Throughout restoring my mental health I have found my life's purpose: to help others who are struggling with mental health recover so that they can enjoy life as much as I—and many other survivors—have.