Liesel Meminger. Inej Ghafa. Aelin Ashryver Whitethorn Galathynius. Names known to some, and literary heroes to many. These heroes faced struggles, all making them more human. Living their journeys over the years has made me realize that everyone around me has a story worth telling. Everyone has demons they fight, trials and tribulations that test their bravery and endurance. And I it is my purpose, as a storyteller, to tell them.
From an early age, fantasy books and movies were my escape. I traveled to Mordor with Frodo and Gandolf. Helped Ged fight his shadow. Faced initiation in the Dauntless faction. Walked through the crystal castles of Lost Cities. Sometimes, it was easier to travel to galaxies far far away than live in reality. I could admire the bonds of the Pevensie siblings instead of listening to my parents discuss divorce in the living room. I could fight against twenty-three other contestants for survival in a dystopian world instead of surviving high school. Watch a Greek demigod outcast find lifelong friends as I drifted away from my own. Although set in a fantasy world, these individuals experienced authentic emotions and challenges; situations that I could vicariously experience, relate to, and then apply the lessons learned to my own life.
I grew up telling stories. As a toddler, I positioned myself on a stump in my backyard and sat for hours telling stories to the plants, birds, and insects that happened by. As a first grader, I wrote fantastical stories and my friend drew the accompanying imagery. In elementary school, I stepped into others’ stories as an actor. Come middle school, I went to a performing arts school for Video Cinema Arts in order to strengthen my storytelling voice. Today, I look to the people around me to share their stories. When I look back on my life, I have never not been a storyteller. I was born to share and craft experiences into stories that inspire, excite, and provoke.
Unfortunately, my uninhibited passion comes with it's challenges. I have always been aware of doing everything in order to keep all doors of opportunity open for my future self. This meant joining every club, taking every advanced class, and striving to set myself a part as exceptional.The moment after I achieved something I moved on to my next goal. I strived for perfection but slowly learned that “perfection” was impossible. I couldn’t be the perfect daughter, so I didn’t try to be a daughter at all. I couldn’t say the perfect things in every scenario, so I stopped talking. But I found things that I could control; I could stay up the latest, win the most awards, get the best grades, eat the least, workout the most, and do it all while fake-smiling convincingly. Consequently, it heightened anxiety and stress, and did not change course. I found that it is hard to step off the hamster wheel of achievement when I was constantly rewarded and congratulated for burning myself out. From teachers commenting, “Excellent work! Amazing job!” to peers being surprised only if I didn't earn a top grade, the pressure to always be at the top of my game has been crushing. Over the years, fortunately, I’ve found support in developing positive relationships with my teachers, parents, and friends and been able to share about the pressures I’ve felt. I've realized both that the simple act of asking for help relieves some of the stress, and that people are quite understanding. The challenges have enriched my filmmaking, giving me a better understanding of what it means to be human. What it means to struggle.
I value being a filmmaker. Through moving, colorful, and boundless images, I wish to share all that I can about what little I know about this world. I want to share others’ stories, whether empowering, sad, profound, bold, adventurous, ordinary, or deep. I want to share these stories because I am fascinated by people. I love the world and the individuals who make it up. Through others, I learn something new about myself. And through film, I am transported to other worlds. It is my hope to experience emotions they never even knew had a name; like hiraeth: the longing for a home you’ve never had. It’s a feeling not all that different from nostalgia, just more distant in a way. I want everyone to be able to feel a part of a different world, not simply to escape their own, but to gain a perspective on the world they live in. To me, films present the philosophies of some of the earth’s greatest minds, giving the public a taste of concepts like existentialism, modernism, and alternate realities.
As a storyteller, the world is my muse and filmmaking is my art.