Losing my Papa was so devastating to me as a 9-year-old. He was there for me every day. I would get home from school, and he'd be sitting on the porch waiting for me. He was my rock. It’s hard to understand, but he was my best friend. When he passed, my entire world turned upside down. I didn’t want to play a sport I loved because it was his favorite sport. I also refused to watch our favorite TV shows and movies. He was my ride or die, and I lost him. The days felt longer, and the laughter faded. I remember sitting on the porch where we used to talk for hours, feeling empty without him. After he was gone, I refused to go anywhere because it never felt right going without him. Everything reminded me of him, from the little things like the way the sun would set to the big things like family gatherings. I felt like I was in a slump of sadness, and I didn’t know how to break free. I missed his jokes, his wisdom, and just the comfort of his presence. It was like a part of me was missing, and I didn’t know how to fill that void. As time went on, I realized I couldn’t remember him as well as I used to. The memories started to fade, and that scared me. I wanted to keep him alive in my heart, so I started playing softball again. It was a way to connect with him, to feel like he was still with me. I also began watching our favorite shows, laughing and crying, trying to hold on to every little piece of him. Now, as a junior in high school, I want to play our sport in college. It feels like a tribute to him, a way to honor the love we shared. But even as I pursue my dreams, I still carry some trauma from that loss. It’s not huge, but it affects me in ways I didn’t expect. For example, I can no longer go to funerals. The thought of it brings back too many painful memories, and I just can’t handle it. It takes a long time for me to get close to people. I find myself holding back, afraid that they might leave too. It’s like a little voice in my head reminding me of the pain I felt when I lost Papa. I know it’s not fair to others, but it’s a protective mechanism I’ve developed over the years. I want to let people in, but the fear of losing them keeps me at a distance. Yet, through all of this, I’ve learned the importance of cherishing the memories we create with those we love. I find comfort in sharing stories about Papa with my friends and family. It helps me keep his spirit alive and reminds me that love transcends loss. It’s a journey, and while it’s not always easy, I’m learning to embrace both the joy of memories and the pain of loss. It’s a part of who I am now, and I know Papa would want me to keep living life to the fullest, just like he did.

I come from a low-income house where we struggle to even pay the bills or get groceries. I am only seventeen and have tried to help pay the bills. To help my family, I have babysat since I was ten, worked for the school since I was twelve, and started working a third job this past year. My life has consisted of juggling these three jobs, sports, watching my sister, maintaining a 3.9 GPA, and keeping up with my concurrent classes. This has been challenging, but I have worked hard to help my parents provide for my family. In the near future, I hope to find a way to afford college. Staying near home is important to me, so I can continue to support my family. My dream college is The University of Oklahoma. However, I know that attending The University of Oklahoma will not be possible without obtaining many scholarships. Therefore, I have developed a backup plan that will still allow me to achieve my dreams. My backup plan is to attend a junior college, Murray State, and pursue a nursing degree. With my nursing degree, I will then apply to The University of Oklahoma and work as a nurse while I study to become a doctor. This path will be more affordable initially and will allow me to continue working to support myself and my family. Affording Murray State will still be a challenge, but it requires less money upfront compared to a four-year university. To cover the costs of attending Murray State, I plan to work as much as possible. Once I transfer to The University of Oklahoma, I will work as a night nurse to earn the money needed for my expenses. Balancing work and school will be difficult, but I am determined to succeed. While working through the night, I will take classes during the day and try to remain a full-time student. This demanding schedule will require a lot of dedication and hard work, but I believe it will be worth it in the end. My ultimate goal is to become a doctor, and I am willing to make the necessary sacrifices to achieve that dream. Despite the challenges, I am committed to pursuing higher education and a career in medicine. I understand the importance of hard work and perseverance, and I am prepared to do whatever it takes to reach my goals. By staying focused and being determined, I believe I can overcome the obstacles in my path and make a positive impact on my family and become the first to graduate college. In conclusion, even though achieving my dreams will be challenging, I am confident in my ability to succeed. With a solid plan in place and a strong work ethic, I am determined to achieve my dream of becoming a doctor. By attending Murray State and then transferring to The University of Oklahoma, I will be able to balance my responsibilities and work towards a brighter future for myself and my family.