“Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.” – George Santayana. With thousands of World War 2 veterans and Holocaust survivors still alive today, it is hard to believe that we have seemingly forgotten about arguably the most heinous part of history within the same lifetime. I have always been drawn to History, but World War 2 holds a place of interest in my life that is unbeatable by any other era. My family is from Bohemia, which if you are unfamiliar with pre-World War 2 Europe, was a country located in the northern part of what is now the Czech Republic before Hitler took it over. My great-grandparents were lucky enough to join my great grandpas' brother Leonard in America at the start of the war. There are countless lessons to be learned from this era, and I could truly go on forever about them and their importance, but I will keep this short and simple. We are witnessing horrifying similarities within our society when compared to Nazi Germany. Hitler outlawed abortion, and as of June 2022, the supreme court overruled the historic Roe Vs. Wade case, leaving the legality of abortion in the hands of individual states. Women have historically always been the second place to men, and while on paper it generally states that we are equal- we all know that is not the case. While we have the option to wear makeup and wear the kind of shoes we prefer, the language and propaganda spewed at women who choose to dress or act the way they want is anything but kind. With terms like “Femanazi” and being told to “act ladylike,” it seems to be clear what is expected of women is hardly different than it has been historically. What Hitler did to convince women that they were the most important part of Nazi Germany, as we were needed to procreate, while also stripping them of all their rights was nothing short of a cruel and carefully controlled act within the regime. In America, we are witnessing similar attempts to control women. We have made it increasingly harder for working mothers by not offering any maternal leave, childcare subsidies, food or housing subsidies, or even universal healthcare. So, while we have not reached the point of the government saying we are not allowed to work, they certainly have not made it easy on us. With so many government officials pushing the narrative of socialism to be equal to Hitler, or the support of socialist ideals making you a Nazi; many citizens are falling into the trap of the propaganda these officials are spewing across every social media platform available. While many things Hitler offered to the citizens of Germany represent many socialist ideas- Hitler himself did not claim socialism to the definition that we do today. The subsidies Hitler offered to the public were carefully drafted from the wishes of the German people and then used against them by the Nazi regime to control them. While Hitler had this plan all along, he was brilliant in the way of selling the idea to the German people that he was going to be the Führer that would bring pride and dignity back to them. Many men that fought for the Nazi regime lived with tremendous amounts of shame after the war. We are witnessing the beginning of another world war if we do not learn from the lessons taught during World War 2 at the expense of millions of people's lives. Being on the right side of history will always be in style.

Growing up with a single mom who had extremely untreated mental health issues for decades, sets you up for your future in ways that are less than helpful. While I had dreams as a small child, growing into adolescence and my teen years my only goal was to survive. I couldn’t imagine a life after 18, one where I wasn’t under her control. On my 18th birthday she told me, “My legal obligation to you is done, get out.” So, that’s exactly what I did. I left without having any concept of what the world was like, and I left her house with the understanding that abuse was love. My 18th birthday also happened to be the day I met my future ex-husband. He was only a few years older than me, but had so much confidence and knowledge about life that I was ignorant to. He was also a narcissist and abusive, I just didn’t know it at the time. We spent the better half of a decade together, and share two daughters. Leaving an abusive relationship is never easy, and harder when you have children. What is even harder, is leaving when you genuinely don’t know that their behavior is unacceptable and you’re brainwashed that your family and friends are just jealous of the relationship you two share. Besides, what was worse- staying with him or moving back to my moms’ house? Staying with him won, every time. When you ask someone what they’re goals are, you expect to hear the traditional and normal answers of being successful and financially secure. Traveling the world and having a home filled with love, a spouse and children or maybe just a million dogs to cuddle and play with. What is commonly left out of this dream, is happiness. My one and only true goal in life is to be happy. While I can’t wait to finish school and become a lawyer, own my own home and travel the world with my kids; what would any of that mean if I am not happy? While happiness and what makes someone happy can change every day, I think that is the most beautiful part about life. Of course, I have goals, goals that some days feel unattainable. When I am up all-night crying working through my statistics homework and working SO hard for a barely passing grade, it feels like I won’t ever make it into law school, let alone finish and pass the bar. Then when my daughters were yelling for me as I walked across the stage, I am reminded why this goal was so important to me to begin with. Just this previous semester my 5-year-old started suffering from seizures. It has been a nightmare and with endless doctors’ appointments and stress, but I still managed to get a 3.7 GPA. My goals for life are to break the generational trauma that has been carried in my family. To raise intelligent and kind girls ready to take on the world. Ones that trust themselves, but know they are always safe with mom. To graduate law school and create a better world for my daughters. I will never allow the hardships in my life define who I am.

When my best friend of 17 years was in the neurology unit in a medically induced coma, they told us she had a better chance of coming back if we played music she would recognize. She passed away 6 days after being in the hospital, four days after my daughter's second birthday. Did I mention my daughter was named after her? While I have kept the details of her death minimal, my daughter is very well aware of her "Big Sara" and we talk about her often. My daughter is almost 9 and has no memory of Sara except for the stories I have told her. Music has always been a big part of my life and my daughters share the same love. Recently one of our favorite singers released a new album and on it, there is a song called "Drowning." Chris Young sings about the grief he faces after losing someone close to him. How he still calls their old phone number to hear their voicemail. How looking at old pictures makes him laugh and cry. How his life isn't the same without them here and how they were taken far too soon. My daughter loves this song, and always talks about how it makes her think of her big Sara. Luckily she sits in the backseat of the car and can't see my tears when we listen to it. I love that she loves the song, and talks about Sara as if she is still here. That doesn't take the pain away that our kids aren't growing up together like we always planned, or the fact that she was barely 23 when she died. This song has truly spoken to me in the darkest parts of my grief, and it means to much to us.

I was always the black sheep of the family. Not in a negative way, but coming from a fairly conservative family and being raised by a single mom, I was already a little different. Throw in the fact that I have a loud and exuberant personality with a love of all things shiny and covered in glitter, it would be an understatement to say I stood out in my family. I always had this idea of how truly boring some of my family members were. When I was 8 years old, my life was forever changed. The movie 'Legally Blonde' came out and I decided then and there that my life goal was to embody Elle Woods. Elle was passionate, intelligent, kind, and in no way boring. As I got older and became more aware of specifically what lawyers do, I had a few moral questions come up within myself. Would I really be able to sleep at night if I fought for the release of a convicted pedophile? What if the person accused really was innocent and I convinced the jury to sentence him to death? When I was 18 I met my future ex-husband. We were together for almost a decade. A decade of abuse that I will spare the details of here for the both of us. While making my plan to leave him, I spoke to numerous family lawyers and while I was eternally grateful for their help, realized I would never be able to do what they do. So how can I fulfill my dream of being Elle Woods if my job would stop me from sleeping most nights? After packing up my young daughter, and then finding out I was pregnant with my second daughter shortly after leaving, I restarted our lives with only what I could fit in my car. I soon realized how hard this was actually going to be. After two years of living with friends and family when we could, hotels when I had the extra money, or shelters when I didn't, I got approved for a rental home for us. The first night in our home the three of us slept on an air mattress together and I held both my girls and cried harder than I ever had in my life. I made the decision after over a decade of dropping out of high school to go back and finish. My ex had always held it over my head that he had a GED and I had nothing. So in a petty way of being better than him, I wanted to get my diploma. I realized that I was finally at a place in my life where I could chase the dreams I had for the majority of my life. While it's pretty cliche to say my daughters are the motivation to accomplish my dreams, it is the truth. I want a better life for them, I want to show them that no matter what you can and will be able to accomplish those dreams no matter how 'late' it may seem, or how stupid it is to others and no matter how embarrassing it is to be the oldest in your classes, you will succeed. Having my daughters cheer for me as I walked across the stage when I graduated, and hearing them tell their friends "My mom is going to be a lawyer." brings me more pride than I could ever explain. That pride overwhelmingly makes up for the years of heartache we faced together, and I wouldn't change anything in the world.