THE LIGHT One day in May I turned on the light I was longing for this perfected beauty that was of my past but all I saw was the new me I looked in the mirror and didn’t understand why it didn't last As a stared at my precious newborn baby girl She was my gift, the light of my life But somewhere inside of me I still felt consumed by darkness Sad and confused because I was a new wife Who was I? I didn’t feel I was me But deep inside, I knew something was bleak I didn’t feel the way I normally felt I ached in my arms, and when I went to lie down, I was weak I could not breathe, I had no appetite, I couldn't even hold my baby girl So I went to the place I had avoided to go Yet, she was light And found out the information I was devastated to know How could a heart fail, when a child is born My light was dim but inside I had to stay strong I took many pills to heal the pain But I would wake up and experience the same things over again My future was unknown My mind was in a dark place But my girl, my gift from God I had to find my light it was something I had to embrace Times in life you laugh and you cry When you see the light you ask yourself why Why me, this wasn't the story I imagined The happily ever after, this was not supposed to happen But it did, if not someone else, I guess choose me Reason being so others can feel the light and one day begin to see How darkness is only temporary, look to the light to handle the rest And remind yourself that things will always work out for the best The light will shine If you just let it through Rid yourself of the darkness And good things will come to you Oh how I love the light Please never stop shining on me Darkness lives here no more The light has set me free 1,825 days went by, and seasons came and went I looked up to the sky, and time in the light I spent Dreams of a nurse, deferred but now being fulfilled It was the light within me that made my heart heal.

The number one thing I would like to see change in this country is the way African Americans are treated in the healthcare system. Many people are dying simply because of the color of their skin, and because their voices are not being heard and their needs are not being met within the healthcare system. My story began during my 9th month of pregnancy. I began addressing concerns with my OBGYN about things I thought were concerning; swelling, shortness of breath, and rapid weight gain. My concerns were dismissed, and I was told that everything I was experiencing was "normal." So, despite my concerns, my due date was quickly approaching and I was honestly very nervous. I then found out that my daughter was breech and I would be scheduled for a cesarean section. My daughter came naturally (although I still had to have a c-section) a day early on May 3, 2016. My pregnancy experience wasn't the best, I complained to the doctors I couldn't breathe while laying flat, and they ignored it and gave me oxygen. I also asked them to inform me of each medication they were giving me and they did not. So, after giving birth I began vomiting, and I was highly medicated and in a lot of pain. I spent four days recovering in the hospital and the most noticeable physical change my family recognized after I gave birth was the massive amount of swelling in my legs. We all mentioned our concerns to the nurses and the doctors and they reiterated that what I was experiencing was "normal." I found myself getting more concerned because the nurse anesthesiologist came into my room, and asked me if I ever had an issue with tachycardia (fast heartbeats) because she mentioned she noticed it during the delivery; I replied to her that I had no previous history of anything heart-related, and she left without giving much explanation. So, on discharge day, my blood pressure was high, my legs were extremely swollen, and I had many questions about the tachycardia that was mentioned, and everyone on the health care team ensured everything I was experiencing was "normal" and they sent me home. Once I got home I found myself getting extremely weak, I couldn't eat, or sleep, and when it was time for my 7-week post-partum checkup, I mentioned all of these symptoms I was having, and she told me I was experiencing post-partum depression. The next week I couldn't walk and was beginning to have pain in my chest and arms. So in July 2016, after visiting the ER twice (the first time they sent me away and said I had a stomach bug), after many tests were run, I was then diagnosed with a life-threatening heart condition called postpartum cardiomyopathy. It affects 1 in 3000 women (primarily African American women), and I was told my heart was functioning at 8%, and my entire body was retaining fluid. I then went on to have a heart attack, and a stroke, and had to be airlifted to receive better care. 6 years later, my heart is functioning much higher and I'm now on the path of spreading awareness; I will be starting nursing school in January 2023. When I become a nurse, my goal is to work with mothers alongside doctors and advocate for patients so they won't have to experience what I did. I nearly lost my life, and I will do whatever I can to create positive change in the healthcare system and advocate for quality care overall; especially for African American men and women.