Before you understand my turnaround point, you have to understand why I had it. My biological father was a drug addict and a pathological liar. My mom was smart enough to divorce him and get her life together. She remarried to a great guy who was funny and treated my older sister and I as his own. Until we were behind closed doors. My stepfather raped my older sister and I and there was nothing I could do about it. I was three when they met so I have no idea when it started or even when I started realizing what happened. When my mom found out she just kicked him out for a few days, made him apologize, and then things went back to normal. I just recently moved out of the house to go to college and I have been struggling a lot. I would get sad a cut myself and was ruining relationships because I was sad all the time. So, I started looking for ways to turn my pain into power. I watched a TikTok about this girl explaining how she turned pain into power with the Medusa story. I decided to look it up and I finally understand. I am powerful. At that point I decided to stop playing the role of the victim and be a survivor. I got a Medusa tattoo on the wrist that I used to cut so when I think about doing it again I can remember that I will no longer play the part of a victim, but of a survivor, a warrior. I am powerful.

Why do I want to be a nurse? Soon after deciding that nursing is what I wanted to do with my life, I kept asking myself this same question. I kept thinking that maybe it was because I have worked in a care home since freshman year and I was comfortable with it, or maybe it was because it was safe and I knew I would be stable. Sure, all of these things play a part but none of these will be the reason I decided to stick to my decision and pursue being a hospice nurse. I have worked in my small town, a local care home for around 4 years. It has been an insane experience with highs and lows like every job has. One specific night that made me finalize my decision was one of the lowest times. I was working my shifts during quarantine as usual but due to Covid no visitors were allowed in and no residents were allowed out. The number of residents I had to comfort while they cried because they couldn’t see their family was heartbreaking but was even sadder was the fact that some of them didn’t have any family members that visited them anyway. This was very troubling for me. I know that people are busy but I could never imagine leaving my grandparents or parents in the care home with no one to visit them. This is when I decided that I would be there as a family member to all residents. I am a very friendly person. I love talking to people and hearing other people's life stories. It takes so many different people to make the world go round and what kind of world would we be if we did not share our different stories. I want to make sure that families know that their loved one is safe and loved, and I want the resident to feel like they are still somebody, somebody who matters and is appreciated, not just an old person sitting in a care home or another body to feed until they die. They should all go feeling loved and supported. So now, when I am asked why I want to do this my answer will be humanity. I want to do this so I am humbled, so I get to hear all of these different stories and feel all of these different emotions. Crying when I lose a friend and laughing when I get to joke around with them for one more day. It is all for the humanity that I love to be reminded of.

When I was 11 years old, I stood up to my rapist. From a young age, there were many important men in my life, from my grandpa to all of my uncles. You never would assume it's the people closest to you. I eventually told my mother what had happened. We cried and held each other and finally, she gave me the courage to face him. “ Despite everything you have done to me I will continue to laugh, love, and feel everything this life has to offer”, these were the boldest words I had ever spoken.