As a child, I often dealt with my emotions by eating. I was terrified of eating in front of others and, after a long day of restricting my intake, I binged. This fear was self-imposed. I was deeply worried that if I ate in school, I would be made fun of for eating too much or eating in an 'odd way'. The anxiety made the problem worse. This pattern lasted well into my teenage years. It was not until I started focusing on myself and changing up my lifestyle that I truly started on a road to recovery. I made drastic changes in my life and, as I have learned, results often come with a bit of hard work and motivation. In my sophomore year, I began working as a lifeguard at the YMCA. Getting a job was already a huge change but I began to realize that I had to make a few more to excel. During training, I found that my recreational swimming experience was not enough to get me where I needed to be. I would have to work at it and I soon began to heavily reconsider how I lived. At this time, I was already beginning to recover from my binge-eating. I was out of school for much of this schoolyear as I had found comfort in online schooling due, in part, to my eating problem. I had not restricted myself throughout the day anymore and, though this helped exponentially, I still had to keep improving. When I took breaks at work, I would do stretches or swim. Outside of work and school hours, I began to exercise regularly. My diet improved as well. Vegetables and fruit became a staple rather than a side dish. Desserts came after dinner and sometimes not at all. I could finally control how I ate. These changes did not come over night. I had to motivate myself to do better. That, perhaps, was a change, too. I never was able to motivate myself before but, as I improved, I just kept getting more and more excited to get better. Health, for me, has always been about knowing what's best for you. Changes should be made when you feel like you are not doing enough. If you want to see improvement, you have to work at it. I sometimes felt like giving up. I looked at myself and saw the same little kid I always had. However, when I looked at old photos, I could see the difference. I could feel it, too. My muscles didn't hurt anymore after a walk. I could run without getting out of breath. I stopped having cravings. I felt amazing and, for the first time, I could say I was healthy.

I never talked out in class or struggled with paying attention. I never was disrespectful or "antisocial". I never was the "problem child" in my classroom. These "nevers" are hard to hear if you are someone who has their own backwards view of what ADHD looks like. These traits are how we diagnose the disorder so they must be the only symptoms. That's what I have realized in my life: Hidden symptoms are fake, unimportant, too obscure and irrevalent to even consider. Girls can not have ADHD, intelligence negates hardship. These false beliefs seem to negate all strengths I have but, as I have overcome adversity, I have realized that what others feel is of little importance to me. I can struggle but my curiosity and drive can easily make up for it. I make my own path in life. I show that neurodivergency is just another way of existing; It can be as wonderful, beautiful, and unique as one wishes it to be. As a child, I spent more time reading and learning than I did interacting with my peers. Social interaction was never something I was interested in. Knowledge was my friend. That drive to learn never really went away. Throughout my high school years, I have tried to do activities that I had a profound interest in. I learned Chinese, I took a course on Marine Science, and I volunteered at a wildlife rehabilitation center. I took part in NASA's L'SPACE program while being dually enrolled in community college and I was a lifeguard at the YMCA. In everything I have done, I learned something new about myself and about the world. Curiosity is an inherent part of ADHD to me. To keep my brain stimulated, I do new things. I try new foods, read new books, and play new video games. In doing so, I have developed a passion for engineering: the field I hope to work in one day. Exploration is one of the many foundations of engineering and science as a whole. Being curious is the first step to exploration. My grandfather used to say that you should get a job that doesn't feel like a job. He was a mining engineer and, while some days felt boring, he often helped save lives. As I have realized, ADHD can greatly affect one's drive to get through those boring days and work towards better ones. Learning to live with the disorder and having it work for me is a strength that I have developed throughout the years. When I feel bored with my work, I remind myself that I am doing something that matters. When I go to college, I know that I will succeed by reminding myself that my hard work will get me somewhere even if I can not see past the fog. My curiosity will guide me and that drive will be the energy I need to go the distance. Neurodivergency is not just about one's ability to sit still in a classroom or pay attention to a teacher; It can be what stands out in a crowd, what drives innovation, or what discovers a new planet. It can inspire, motivate, and create. Being different is a strength. Being different is the way I am.

Technology is very important to everyday life. Many people take it for granted, but, if it were suddenly taken away, billions of people would suffer. From indoor air conditioning to ovens to computers, you can barely survive in this modern world without some form of technology. That's why I want to be an electrical engineer and why I want to devote myself to helping others thrive in this technological world. Ever since I was a child, I have had a strong desire to make the world better. I always was interested in biology and medicine, so I thought for years that I would train to be a neuroscientist, specifically focusing on helping those with Parkinson's disease. My family had bought a house from a woman with the illness and, as an eight-year-old, I was highly dedicated to helping her despite my obvious limitations. I researched for hours, trying to figure out how Parkinson's worked and what I could do to help her. I soon found out that this task was far more difficult than I anticipated, but I still had the desire in my heart to help someone, even if it took years. As I grew, I became more interested in engineering and the pursuit of knowledge. I amassed books on astronomy, physics, and calculus. I built LEGO sets, played Minecraft, and learned to solder. My hobbies throughout my childhood and early teenage years led me to engineering. In middle school, I went on a field trip to the Kennedy Space Center and it cemented my interest in pursuing a STEM degree. I had never felt more overwhelmed by emotion than when I saw exactly what the human race could accomplish. I once again told myself that I would one day use science to help others. Now, I have accomplished things I wouldn't have dreamt of when I was a kid. I participated in NASA's L'SPACE Academy while dually enrolled in college. I worked as a lifeguard at the YMCA and I volunteered at a wildlife rehabilitation center. Seeing a glimpse into the world of so many different people gave me enough insight to know that I can be a positive impact anywhere. My experiences have been life-changing and I keep pushing for more. I want to one day work on spaceships or a computer that saves someone's life. I want to continue learning and finding new ways to help others. That's why I am pursuing engineering; it is my ticket to helping the world.

My interest in engineering began, definitively, in middle school. At this point, I was obsessed with astronomy. I had bought a pile of books about topics that were really meant for college students. I was determined to figure out the concept, no matter how long it took. To this day, I still am trying to find out quantum mechanics and string theory. There is often a person who influences an aspiring scientist or engineer in their early days of figuring out what exactly they want to pursue. For me, that person was Neil Degrasse Tyson. I looked up to him because of his attitude on life that I felt was very similar to mine and still somewhat is. His quote on how we are made of stardust made me cry as a young teen, though it now seems rather silly. That feeling that my presence somehow fit into the greater whole of the universe was comforting. I think that idea--that I could be part of something greater--fueled my passion even more. Every time I veer off course, I remember my heroes and I remember the questions I never could answer. They are my reason to keep striving for better and the root of my passion. They are what gets me up in the morning.