Growing up, if you had asked me who my favorite parent was, first I'd say, "I can't choose" but then I'd say "probably my dad though". Had you asked me why I'd have said "he makes everything fun", and he truly did. All memories I have of my father growing up were happy. He made going to drop off the recycling fun, that takes talent. He would play with me and my siblings whenever he could. He was loving and funny and cared deeply for his children. And his job put him on a pedestal in my mind. To me, he was a real-life superhero. I was proud to be his daughter. I was twelve when he was arrested. One day, he was there in the morning and gone by the afternoon and I haven’t seen him since. To go from idolizing my father to being told by my mother, my friends, the police, the news, and the rest of the world that he was no hero but instead the monster that lurks in the dark, crushed me. I hated to believe it. People pointed fingers at my family and didn't believe that we were blindsided by him as well. As a result, I felt somehow responsible for his crimes. As I have grown older and have had time to process that year, I have come to a few realizations. For one, I am not responsible for my father's actions, and neither is my mother, my siblings, or my community. Within a family, there is a level of trust and faith that each member will do the right thing. It was not our responsibility, nor our community to question his actions due to the strength of that trust and faith. I have also realized that I should not feel guilty for my refusal to be in contact with him anymore. He hurt a lot of people, myself included, and he faced just consequences, one of those is the loss of his relationship with me. For the past six years, my last name has always been a sensitive point for me. Whenever I have to introduce myself, I always wait for the eyes to shift slightly in recognition. I don't know if there will be a time when that no longer happens but I do know one thing, I possess the ability to change the meaning of my name. I plan to make things right through my career in environmental engineering. I have always had a love for the environment. (Those polar bear commercials really worked on me). I want to help the fight against climate change and make a positive impact on this world. I also want to make it so that when people hear my last name, they think of me first and my father second. I do not wish this to deemphasize his victims and their story. I have the desire to make myself known to this world and wish to live my life separate from his infamy.