Let’s begin with what we’ve heard about attachment styles and how it relates to relationships. I’m healing my attachment issues with therapy, courtesy of the VA, as I didn’t have the best upbringing. For example, my mother is schizophrenic, and my father was a drug user and alcoholic, and by default neglectful, and emotional and physically abusive. After high school, I worked and paid my way through a few years of community college, joined the US Air Force as my way out of this situation, and served for almost 10 years. The GI Bill, though I am grateful, has severe shortcomings for online schooling and does not pay a livable amount for monthly expenses compared to an in-person student. All this to bring you up to what transpired in the last four months. I had a relationship I was moving into the category of “family,” which ended suddenly, and I was blind-sighted. To say I was devastated, and I felt “crushed like no other” was an understatement. I was in shock and denial. I don't know what I would have done without the support of my therapist. Shortly after this break up and when I started the grieving process, my trip out of the country to see my grandma came and went. I traveled by myself, and only with a backpack. I could hardly stay present anywhere I went, and the language barrier was insane, but I got by having learned common phrases ahead of time. I wouldn’t leave my grandma’s side unless my aunt told me to go fetch us lunch. We colored in pages of flowers, and I'd cry thankful, sad, and happy tears in those moments. I knew I’d regret not seeing my grandma, versus the credit card debt this had cost me. I was resourceful and used points I had saved to lessen the blow. This is the last time I get to see her smile and hear her laugh. When I got back home, I started mourning everything; her, him, my dreams. Right after returning home, six days later, I got a severance letter from my employer. My previous employer is a good guy, but the company didn’t hit its financial goals and therefore had to make budget cuts. I‘m thankful to believe that my work stands on its own, so I feel lucky to leave the company with that part of my self-esteem intact. I filed for unemployment soon afterward and registered to attend school. I thought, finally this is my opportunity to attend school full-time and finish my degrees in aviation and engineering! In the past, when I was working full-time, I'd still attended school, albeit it was one class at a time, essentially running a turtle race. Currently, I haven’t received any of the EDD monies and I need to keep this roof over me and my roommate’s head. Student loans will not be disbursed for a while creating this limbo feeling. During all of this, I’m healing. In the beginning, I cycled between denial and trying to fix myself so that I am worthy and lovable again. I worked out and ran every day as something to do. I’m now coming out of that phase, to where I’m accepting there’s “what I’m responsible for,” and there’s “what my ex is responsible for.” I’m in charge of taking care of myself the best way I can; eating, sleeping, and studying. So when the water heater leaking became evident of replacement, I took action, teamed up with my elderly neighbor, we used his truck, I used a credit card and bought a water heater. He helped me lift the tank, and I swapped out the connections with his direction. When I got rear-ended in traffic two weeks ago, I decided I can go without a car, and I rollerblade where I need to go. This is free exercise! I’m using a positive mindset to see the silver lining, that I will be stronger and a better person for these obstacles. I could make it worse by resisting these changes, or I can leverage it. My car needs repair, now’s the perfect time to take it! My grandma is still alive today, so I send her a card every week. The relationship terminating allows me to work on myself, and my goals. These struggles will become easier with time. I know once I finish my degrees, I’ll be employed, and be able to pay it forward as I have in the past. This scholarship will help me stay afloat with living expenses until some form of monies gets deposited. My healing and studies will be my new normal, and my new 2020. Not only will I make it through this tough time, but I’ll come out the other end stronger.

I left a job with my eggs in my basket and started my first business as a continuous improvement consultant. I had completed my lean six-sigma black belt, and though I was empowered, I was still scared. I didn't have another job lined up, but I knew any place would be better than the last work culture I left. I had to get out, and so I took that risk. While getting ready to bid for my first contract, I took my big break to work in a start-up instead. It is safer to work for someone else, and it was an eye-opening experience. It got my foot in the door with drone/UAS and eVTOL/flying car technology and now I'm hungry for more. This technology has the power to influence sales, transportation, agriculture, and manufacturing to name a few. This amazing experience put me at the table with entrepreneurs, investors, and engineers, and I learned a lot about the business, systems, and pain points these clients had. I had no idea this knowledge was gold. Now I'm returning to school to complete my two degrees in aviation maintenance and engineering technology. These two degrees are the best breed of engineering and maintenance that I will need to leverage my work experience to get a better position in the industry. What I'd like to do is invest in a 3D printer and bridge the gap of what some of these clients need, and learn the skillset from school to deliver new, but not necessarily novel ideas. A simple example is prototyping a 3D printed object as a solution. I can do this from an employed position, as clients work with me, and I can offer solutions through the company I'm with, and they pay me for the patent, or I can sell them the parts through my business with an MOU - memorandum of understanding, essentially an agreement between selling my ideas with my employer to the client. Why these companies aren't having their engineers come up with solutions is because they're in production, not in maintenance nor maintenance support. Therein lies the nitch. I have a knack for seeing patterns and implementing ways to improve objects and procedures, and thus my inborn creative entrepreneurialism has an outlet. I can work with clients in the aviation industry and improve on what isn't working for them. I'd like to return to work in the cutting edge of technology in aviation but in the capacity of supporting the companies in that space by finding out what doesn't work well for them and offer solutions for them to run with instead.

In my neglectful and chaotic upbringing, math was one of the few places that made sense in the world. There was no gaslighting, no inflicted pain, just numbers in black and white. The answer was wrong, almost there, or correct. Math was a safe place, and I was lucky enough to have an amazing math teacher in high school who was also my track coach! We're still friends some 15 plus years later. I think because I was good at math, and my teachers believed in me that I went on to college, and started my educational pursuits in engineering. I ended up taking a detour in the military so I could keep a roof over my head, and hopefully afford higher education. Now that I'm out of service 10 years later, I'm healed and healthy enough to finish my two degrees; one on aviation maintenance, and the other in electronic systems engineering technology. I had watched a video presentation recently from iEEE - Institute of Electrical and Electronics Engineers, where the speaker was speaking of target tracking using sensors. This technology is used for UAS/drone delivery, and of course by the military. The presentation has graphs of curves, time intervals, and slopes at the time "t." What was cool is that same evening, I get a text from my friend asking if I could help tutor her son in calculus. I was able to tell him about derivatives, the relation of a straight line to a point on a curved line, and what it could mean in the world of sensors. These sensors are the way robotics perceive its surroundings, and coding is what translates it to useful data. My friend's son wants to be a computer scientist, so the least I can do is keep him motivated to finish his schooling with stories on what the cool "tech. kids" are doing. An under-rated class I loved was argumentative logic. It was like math with words. It had parameters, rules, and consistency, something that felt solid and loving. It allowed me to make sense of words and thoughts on a level I didn't know existed until I took that class. No more fallacies while interacting with others. No more gaslighting. That class brought me more clarity to understanding people, and I'm able to better navigate through the world armed with logical thinking. I'm also in aviation's new industry of UAS - Unmanned Aerial Systems, and eVTOL - electric Vertical Take-off and Landing. I used to perform maintenance on planes in the military, and more recently on UAS. We're at a tipping point where our technicians may need to understand more of where the problem is coming from and why. The answer may require our future technicians to be more tech-savvy to solve these maintenance problems using systematic thinking for troubleshooting, or something more like light programming. It started with algebra, and calculus, it led me to argumentative logic, and as it stands, math has brought me out of the mental fog, and physical and emotional poverty. I've followed it to the cutting edge of technology in aviation. I now see the world as it is, its possibilities, and the possibilities are looking bright.

Diversity brings innovation, sets new norms, which includes representation. I'm currently in aviation's new industry of UAS - Unmanned Aerial Systems, and eVTOL - Electric Vertical Take-off and Landing (vehicles), and a majority of the work force is Caucasian males. I find that diversity relaxes my nerves and allows me to not feel like the token female. Diversity will influence the norms in the industry allowing the narrow span of what is "acceptable," to widen just a little bit and allow the feeling of inclusivity over time. If there were a diverse group in the aviation industry, it will allow the younger generation to see someone who looks like them, and not only illuminate a path but give permission for that child to dream, and achieve that same path if they so choose, or carve a similar path but without all the newness. Not everyone needs to be a pioneer, but it sure helps that someone else has hiked that territory, and has left sign posts behind. If we didn't have different cultures, mind-sets, personalities, and different experiences, then what could someone bring to the table that is different, new, and innovative? I aspire to graduate, return to the industry to work on maintaining, engineering, and developing UAS and eVTOL as a whole, and their components in the short term. In the mid range, I will continue my YouTube channel as a side hustle, and continue with the mini-series I created to help students study and pass the FAA, airframe and powerplant (A & P) tests. I can imagine, with robotics things that fly in the sky, that it will continue to be regulated by the FAA and thus (A & P) maintainers will be needed. Then in the long term, I see myself working for a start-up company as a project management or operations manager. I'm in school full-time for two degrees. One is for engineering technology, and the other is for aviation maintenance. The two degrees make a perfect blend for me to be successful as an engineer, and an aviation maintainer. I've taken the long road to complete my associates degree in avionics while working in the military, and I have a lean 6-sigma black belt which I'd like to use in the future as a manager. I'm on the fence with jumping into a robotics masters degree right away, because these are two STEM degrees I'm completing. My mind might just melt. I'm using whatever privilege I have, and my experience in aviation, to be the change I want to see in this industry, and thus introduce diversity wherever I can. Over time the norms widen, bringing in new, bright, and diverse minds, and in the end bring more innovation. We all benefit from this. A

I see my position and presence in the Aviation's new industry of UAS - Unmanned Aerial Systems, and eVTOL - Electric Vertical Take-off and Landing (vehicles), as a way to influence and bring attention for women, girls, veterans, and minorities to this new space, get a foot in the door, and grow. Why we need to now bring in a diverse group to this industry is because one, this is new, and two, this could be a great equalizer in pay and promotion. We're currently passing the recent zero-point in training for a new industry that has a lot of potential for growth. I currently use my skills of soldering, and my interest in avionics, and electronics to repair and fly UAS/drones. I also have a YouTube channel, with a mini-series I created to help students study and pass the FAA tests who will be our future maintainers. I'm still uploading videos. I'm in school full-time for two degrees. One is for engineering technology, and the other is for aviation maintenance. The two degrees make a perfect blend for me to be successful as an engineer, and a maintainer. I've completed my associates in avionics, and I have a lean 6-sigma black belt which I'd like to use for a promotion to manage operations, or work for a start-up company. I'd like to continue my membership and participation with WiA -Women in Aviation and SWE - Society of Women Engineers by attending events facilitated by them where they reach out to schools, young girls, and fellow colleagues, by introducing them to what's new in STEM and aviation. I see myself as being able to train attendees to use a 3D printer to create a drone. I also see myself maintaining, engineering, and developing UAS and eVTOL as a whole and their components in the short term, and then moving up to a project management or operations in the long term. This is exciting new technology we'll all be able to soon use to facilitate transportation of passengers, cargo, and other deliveries. How it's currently making the world a better place starts from transporting COVID sample to and from laboratories, and delivering vaccines to remote and rural locations. In space exploration, the UAS - Ingenuity is capturing video footage of mars which is helping scientist do their research. UAS is being used to fight crime, by locating and following criminals until someone physically catches up to the location of the criminal. UAS is used by the military as a way to track targets, and to observe operations in progress. eVTOL is proposed to be used to perform short transports, without a pilot, as a way to perform a quick, medical evacuation. A perfect example of this is if there's an injured person on an oil-rig, or an inured soldier on a battle field. Veterans hold a special place in my heart. Being a veteran myself, my hope is to bring home as many soldiers from the field, alive, as possible. If that means sending in a flying vehicle, a flying medical device, or a flying camera to do the job of a person, then that's enough of a reason in my book to do the education and work in this exciting new field.