My thoughts surrounding the importance of mental health stem from my personal experience having a biological father who consistently struggles with mental health. He used a variety of substances when I was younger, and would become a completely different, dangerous, person. I cannot have a strong relationship with him due to his illness; he is unable to recognize the negative effects of not receiving treatment. His lack of understanding has only led his illness to worsen, resulting in him entering the criminal justice system consistently since he was a late teenager. Having experiences such as witnessing his arrest, visiting him in jail and prison and communicating with him very rarely, have contributed to my strong belief in attaining help- however that may look like. My experiences with my father have made me believe in mental health as I have witness how poor mental health can deteriorate relationships. Given the context of my biological father, my interest in grasping what allows individuals to act certain ways or make certain decisions, peaked. I took a psychology course in high school, and highly enjoyed learning about the human brain. The course encouraged me to major in psychology in my undergraduate education. During this experience I learned the importance of acknowledging mental health the same way society thinks about physical health. Physical and mental health are strongly correlated to one another yet we place physical health on a pedestal due to the visual aspect of what a “healthy” person looks like. My biological father always looked and seemed “normal”. When he was not behind bars, he consistently had a job, and provided as much as he could to our family unit. However, mentally he was very atypical. Having a Bachelor's degree in Psychology, and continuing my education by starting a Double Master’s Degree in Forensic Psychology and Counseling; I am able to fully understand the importance of maintaining a healthy mindset and lifestyle. To sustain my mental wellness I enjoy partaking in a variety of activities. I focus heavily on prioritizing my health by ensuring I take at least one day a week to practice my self-care routine. This includes doing my nails at home while I listen to a podcast or watch a video on YouTube. To add, I enjoy enhancing my skin care routine by putting on face masks, derma-planing and exfoliating my face. Other than my weekly self-care routine, I created a morning routine that emphasizes health. In the mornings, I go to the gym, I aim for at least four times a week; I split my days between running and resisting training. Recently I have also incorporated journaling and writing down bible verses for stress relief while I enjoy my coffee at home. This week the bible verse that stood out to me was “Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand” Psalm 73:23. I prefer keeping up with a routine as I enjoy having structure in my day to day though I am still working on a night routine for myself. A main contributor to my mental wellness is recognizing the need for breaks. I take three rest days from the gym but, if my body needs additional time off that week, I will let myself rest without feeling guilty. I tend to struggle with this from time to time as a first generation student, and first generation U.S citizen. The societal norm of constantly working is difficult to avoid however my Psychology background outweighs normative ideas placed by society, such as what a “normal” person looks like.

My earliest memory consists of seeing my father get arrested. I vividly remember being only a few feet away from him, as my fathers face slammed on to the ground while police officers struggled to handcuff him. I was about three to four years old. Although this was the first time I witnessed my father get arrested, it was not the last. Later on, I learned about his continuous cycle in and out of the Criminal Justice System, and his substance use disorders. The effects of parental incarceration are factors I have faced my entire life. I did not get the opportunity to reflect back on my earliest memory, or any memories with my father until recently. However, when I was in middle school, I began to experience extreme feelings of anxiousness, constantly. I struggled to explain my feelings or point of view as I could not even begin to describe exactly what I was feeling. But I felt these emotions overtaking my entire body. I continued to feel this way throughout middle school, and even to this day. In the beginning of my high school years, I began to self medicate. My mom found and immediately put me in counseling. She had seen how my own father reacted negatively to drugs, she wanted to ensure I did not follow his path. That was the start to my mental health journey. I went to a local community clinic and began counseling, I had two diagnoses. Though the counseling sessions were very limited, I greatly cherish Maira, my first counselor. This experience was the first time I could talk to someone with an unbiased opinion. It made me consider the possibility of being like Maria, helping individuals overcome hardships, or simply just being there to listen. The counseling sessions aided me in talking about my early childhood experiences, however my anxiety was still very persistent. So persistent that my anxiety began taking a toll on my physical health. I was referred to a cardiologist as I was showing signs of potential heart irregularities. Those moments were terrifying for me. The doctors could not really tell me what was going on because they were unsure what was happening. They reminded me to stay calm, not knowing how difficult that was for me as I was experiencing extreme anxiety during those moments. I realized how invisible disabilities can be easily disregarded even when you are in a doctor's office. My physician also referred me to a counseling service, yet again I was in the client chair. This time, counseling was different for me, I was not able to fully connect with my counselor for some reason. Nonetheless, I continued my best to be open during our sessions. By the time I had completed my sessions I knew I wanted to work in the mental health field. As a first generation student though, I was aware of the challenges I would face, but that grew my determination to keep going. I started my undergraduate studies and took a class on Positive Psychology. I learned about a variety of topics such as mindfulness practices and benefits, connecting with nature, and how to create new habits. It was a different experience for me as it related to mental health in a different way. As I mentioned, I struggle with expressing how I feel. Positive Psychology made it easier for me to get in touch with myself without having to actually converse with another person. I had not thought about therapy in this way before, but I greatly enjoyed learning more about this field of Psychology. As I went through the rest of my undergraduate psychology courses, I began to question the groups of people I wanted to work with. I had an opportunity to intern at my county’s Juvenile Justice Detention center, where I would be mentoring youth in detention and their intermediate sanction center, for a year. At first this idea did not sound appealing, but it made me think of my father. I wondered if he would have continued his cycle with the Justice System had he had a mentor in his life. I took the internship opportunity, it had a significant impact on my career aspirations. I soon applied to the graduate program I am currently enrolled in, a Double Master’s Program in Forensic Psychology and Counseling. I have plans on continuing my education past that, by receiving a PhD in Clinical Counseling. I see myself working with primarily youth in the Juvenile Justice System. During my internship I felt a strong connection to the youth I was working with. I constantly thought about my father during this, knowing that some of the youth I was working with probably also had a parent or family member in the Justice System. Maybe some of the youth had similar experiences to the one I witnessed when I saw my father getting arrested. Although I did not disclose that my father was in the Justice System, these invisible connections I had made helped me in realizing how connected humans can really be. I will never forget one day during my internship, I was facilitating a group activity with a boys unit. We were having conversations about books they’re allowed to read while in detention, and one boy, age 14, started to recite the bible to me. It was a powerful experience, I cannot put into words. Ultimately it made me realize the interesting ways faith finds itself to us. I pray every night, I ask for confirmation that I am being heard, and I believe that moment I experienced in detention was a sign confirming that I was in the right place at the right time. The mixture of my upbringing with parental incarceration, and my own mental health work have fully shaped me to the person I am. Despite the hardships I have faced, I remain committed to continue my education in order to provide quality care to those groups of people we often forget about, incarcerated youth.

I am a first generation college student who is passionate about completing higher education. Currently I am in my first year of graduate school, I am in a Double Master’s Program obtaining degrees in Forensic Psychology and Counseling. I moved to a small town in California about a month ago, from Austin,Texas where I have lived my whole life. I come from a family of eight. My youngest sister is four, and my oldest sister is 23, only one year older than me. Leaving my family was a very difficult decision for me, we all lived together and are very close. Nonetheless, my dedication to my studies eventually took over my headspace and I officialized my move. I was a psychology major during my undergraduate studies however I took elective classes in the social work and criminal justice fields. The elective classes I was taking, began to spark my interest in other fields relating to psychology. To add, my father being in the justice system since I was only a few years old had a significant impact in my decision to participate in a year-long internship with my county’s juvenile detention center, mentoring youth in detention and in treatment. I had a mix of emotions when first starting this program however I ended up finding great joy working with juveniles in the justice system. I would attend the facility 4 times a week. I met individually with two mentees, along with conducting group activities in units. After the internship, I started my second research internship with the McNair Scholars Program. A federally funded program intended to guide first generation students of low economic backgrounds or of historically underrepresented minorities in PhD programs to obtain doctoral degrees. My research focused on juvenile probation officers and their perceived effectiveness. These factors, along with my fathers past behind bars, ultimately led me to my current Master’s Program, studying the blend between mental health and the criminal justice system. Having a background in research, I plan on tailoring future research experiences to focus on effective therapeutic techniques for individuals with childhood trauma in the justice system. Though there are trauma informed techniques in therapy, there is no diagnosis or treatment to those who have experienced abuse and/or neglect as children. Without the proper diagnosis, providing accurate support to patients can become challenging. Additionally, considering how often we, as a society, often forget about those who are incarcerated, the opportunity for them to access the proper support is quite low. To sum, my undergraduate research and internship experiences, along with personal factors, have greatly impacted my decision to study in the fields of law, and mental health. Given my hands-on involvement in research, I would like to focus on providing accurate aid to those who have experienced childhood abuse/or neglect, particularly, juveniles who are incarcerated.

I am a first generation American, and college student who is passionate about completing higher education. Currently I am in my first year of graduate school, I am in a Double Master’s Program obtaining degrees in Forensic Psychology and Counseling. I moved to a small town in California about a month ago, from Austin,Texas where I have lived my whole life. I come from a family of eight. My youngest sister is four, and my oldest sister is 23, only one year older than me- did I mention, we also all live under the same roof. Before moving states, I quit my job where I had been the past five years. I started working at the age of 15, I enjoyed working because of the independence I was able to build at a young age. Nonetheless, quitting my job felt uneasy for me, mostly because this change meant I would have to change my lifestyle and heavily rely on my support system. I knew the workload of graduate school would require more of my time than my undergraduate studies. My determination to my studies began to challenge any possible distractions I would be facing. Knowing the countless opportunities I had to miss due to my job, I was not going to repeat this cycle.At this point, my determination for higher education, ultimately is the reason why I decided for the first time to take a break from having a job during my first semester of graduate school. I wanted ample time to adjust to the known and unknown changes, and heavily focus on my school work. As a self-supporting first generation student, entering graduate school came with a lot of questions, and changes for me. I am a committed student, and have always had school as a number one priority. That being said, something I have been struggling with is taking a step back to reflect and rest. I have constantly been on “go-mode” keeping myself busy with school, work, church, my family etc. My determination has always encouraged me to move forward. My determination held me accountable for completing my education, always. During my first two years of undergraduate studies, I knew I wanted to pursue a PhD, but I had absolutely no idea what graduate school was, or if I could ever be accepted into a program. My determination persisted, and I started talking with my professors in hopes of learning more about higher education. I met an incredible mentor who was one of my professors. She introduced me to the McNair Scholars Program. A federally funded program that guides first generation students of low socioeconomic backgrounds, or of historically underrepresented minorities in PhD programs, to obtain a doctoral degree, lucky enough I fit under both requirements. My mentor wrote my recommendation letter, and after interviewing, I was accepted into the program. This program has been immensely helpful, and is a main reason why I am currently in a graduate program- because of determination. As I mentioned, I am enrolled in a counseling program. I have been learning a variety of counseling theories and examining how these theories can be implemented or have been implemented into my life. I have needed to reflect deeply within myself in order to fully connect with the theories I am learning. I know the start of this journey would have been exhausting, had I not quit my job. Thus far, the ability to reflect my determination and simply take a break and allow my support system to be fully integrated in my life, has been the best decision for me.

Coming from a single parent and low income household has taught me the importance of making difficult decisions in order to overcome hardships. To start, my mom, like many, immigrated to the United States for the sole purpose of providing a brighter future to her children. I knew that decision was an extreme sacrifice for my mom. Additionally, my mom always worked two jobs to provide for my sister and I. These jobs took most of her time, again, she sacrificed her time by focusing on providing for my sister and I. My mom made yet another difficult decision when she had to divorce my father. He was abusive, mentally ill, constantly and currently in prison. Growing up with the effects of parental incarceration has been overwhelming to put it short. Knowing how this has personally affected me, I interned in my county's Juvenile Justice Department during my senior year of undergraduate. I mentored youth once a week one-on-one and conducted group activities with units. I greatly enjoyed working with juveniles, they had loads of energy and countless stories to share. Not knowing this was going to have such an impact on me- it led me to decide on a Double Master’s in Forensic Psychology and Counseling. However, I was faced with a difficult decision myself. This program was offered in a different state, a 25 hour drive away from my home that I eventually made- a month ago. As a self supporting, first generation student, this decision was not easy to make- I have always lived and been close with my family. I accepted this difficult decision and I am ready to see where this new journey takes me. I am committed to finishing my degree, continuing my education, and providing assistance to juveniles in the criminal justice system.