For years, some of my hardest battles were the ones no one could see. I could read the same page three times and still have to start over. I could appear capable while ADHD made focusing exhausting, anxiety kept my mind racing, depression made the future difficult to see, and PTSD kept the past close behind me. Eventually, substance use became my attempt to quiet all of it.
For a long time, I did not understand how deeply mental health was shaping my life. Trauma affected the way I saw safety, relationships, and myself. Anxiety left me constantly on edge and consumed by worry. Depression made it difficult to imagine a future beyond whatever I was trying to survive at the time. PTSD taught me that surviving something does not mean it stops affecting you when the immediate danger is over. I carried experiences with me long after they happened.
Eventually, substances became a way of coping with pain I did not know how to process. What began as an attempt to escape created an entirely different set of consequences. Trauma, mental health, substance use, instability, and involvement with the criminal legal system became intertwined. For a period of my life, so much of my energy went toward surviving that I had little left to imagine who I could become.
Recovery required more than stopping my substance use. I had to confront the reasons I wanted to escape in the first place. I had to address my mental health, process trauma, learn healthier ways to cope, and begin understanding myself in ways I never had before. That process changed one of my most important beliefs: struggling with mental health is not a reflection of someone's character, intelligence, strength, or potential.
That understanding has profoundly affected my relationships. I have learned that people can carry tremendous pain while appearing completely fine to everyone around them. Because of that, I try to approach people with curiosity and compassion rather than assumptions. I understand how powerful it can be to have someone listen without immediately judging, labeling, or trying to define you by the hardest period of your life.
That perspective is especially important to me as a mother. I want my children to grow up knowing that mental health is something we can talk about openly. I want them to know that asking for help is normal, that emotions do not need to be hidden, and that struggling does not mean they have failed. I cannot protect them from every difficult experience, but I can help create a home where they never feel they have to suffer silently.
My mental health has also shaped the way I understand education and achievement. ADHD can make reading and focusing require significantly more effort, but I have learned how to work with my brain rather than constantly fighting against it. I learned to advocate for accommodations, develop strategies that work for me, and recognize that receiving support does not diminish an accomplishment.
Those lessons helped carry me to graduation from the University of Washington with a 3.99 GPA. Now, I am preparing to begin law school. I am proud of those accomplishments, but not because they prove I somehow defeated mental illness. I have not. I still intentionally manage ADHD, anxiety, depression, and the effects of trauma. Success did not make those challenges disappear. It taught me that I can continue building a meaningful life while managing them.
My experiences have also shaped my aspirations. Today, I work with people navigating education, reentry, housing instability, and other systemic barriers. I understand how mental health, trauma, substance use, poverty, and involvement with the criminal legal system can intersect because I have experienced some of those intersections myself. When I meet someone during a difficult chapter of their life, I do not see only the circumstances in front of me. I wonder who that person could become if they had the right support and someone who believed their current circumstances did not define their future.
That belief is also part of why I am pursuing law. I want to combine my lived experience, social work background, and legal education to advocate for people whose lives are too often reduced to diagnoses, records, addictions, or mistakes. Systems have a way of turning complicated human beings into labels. My experiences have taught me to look beyond those labels.
Mental health has ultimately changed the way I understand the world. I no longer believe strength means carrying everything quietly. Sometimes strength is saying that you are struggling. Sometimes it is accepting help. Sometimes it is going to treatment, entering recovery, requesting an accommodation, setting a boundary, or simply admitting that you cannot do everything alone.
There was a time when I tried to silence what I was experiencing. Today, I use those experiences to advocate, connect, and create change. I cannot rewrite the chapters of my life shaped by trauma, depression, anxiety, ADHD, or substance use, and I would never pretend those experiences were easy. But I can decide what I build from them.
I am building a life where my children know that mental health can be spoken about openly, a career where people are seen beyond their hardest moments, and a future where my lived experience strengthens rather than limits my ability to create change. For me, bringing mental health out of the darkness begins there: telling the truth about what we carry and showing others that they do not have to carry it silently.