They say that death is when you truly lose someone. However, I beg to differ. My grandfather was diagnosed with severe dementia five years before his eventual passing. I was eight years old when my grandfather's mind became hazy. In the beginning, he just forgot the name of the street or where they were going. But as the days and years pass by, it seems that his memory passed with it. My grandfather, Grandpa Tony, served his country in Korea. He spoke fluent Japanese and loved to tell you stories. Sadly, those stories became less. He no longer could recall the difference between Japanese and English, and he didn't remember where he was, in Korea or the US. It was heartbreaking to see my grandfather become a shell of who he once was. Yet, it was excruciating when he no longer remembered he had a granddaughter. I was eleven years old when my grandfather forgot my multiple birthday parties, accomplishments, and my name.
It was a hurdle to push myself to come to see him again, as much as I wanted to be there for him and support him. It was hard to be asked if I was a volunteer. Watching him look at me and, in his eyes, have no recognition of who I was. It took a week, but I did continue to go. I decided that I would create new memorable moments that week. So, I hosted volunteer events at his nursing home, having a caroling session during Christmas. I brought him toy cars on his birthday and told him about my accomplishments in wrestling. All the things we used to talk about when he remembered. When I was thirteen, during my wrestling practice, his third stroke took his life.
I was devastated to have lost my grandpa. But as time has passed, I've strangely become thankful. Dementia had taken my Grandpa years before the stroke took his body. We all tried to hold on to him in the hope of treating the incurable. Instead of a cure, he became a shell of a man when he passed. I look back on those years, and I'm thankful to have those memories with him. I'm glad that there were people around him. However, I came to learn that there are many people who have Dementia and Alzheimer's who rarely receive visitors as it's too hard for loved ones to see them. So I decided to volunteer at Lutheran Nursing Home in the Dementia and Alzheimer's wing to be there for residents who don’t see the ones they have forgotten. Volunteering gave me a sense of closure and resolve I needed after the passing of my grandpa. It gave me insight into the frustrations my grandpa faced as he slowly had a part of himself forgotten. It gave me the determination to try to change others' experiences. I started by creating and leading donation drives, from gathering flowers for residents to creating a card and small gifts drive for Valentine's Day, all in the hopes of bringing joy to residents. As I have grown, so has my aspiration to help. I hope to become a Biomedical Engineer at Michigan Technological University to try to change people's experience with what is deemed incurable.
I don’t know if I will be able to cure Dementia, but I hope to provide hope where it is needed. I hope to share my story so more people don’t stop fighting and allow the ones they love to become a shell of who they are. I hope to inspire people to take advantage of their time with them while they can. I believe in the ideology of Ralph Waldo Emerson: “To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived; that is to have succeeded.”