In 2020, my world shut down, and not because of the Covid-19 pandemic. I was diagnosed with Neuroborreliosis and other co-infections that left me practically bedridden. I had to drop out of school at the end of my sophomore year of high school and only attended school in person half the time during my junior year. I was going to doctor appointments every single day that included chiropractic work, IVs, oxygen machines, and more. On top of that, making it to church every week was tough. I dealt with excruciating pain and fatigue every time I went, and I often felt like I had to hide what I was feeling. Shoving all these emotions under the rug only made the pain escalate. Eventually, I hit a breaking point. I went to my room and begged God for relief. I felt like I couldn't go on. Every day felt like scaling a mountain. Nobody understood what I was going through, not to mention some of my friends stopped talking to me because suddenly I was too weird, and boring. My dreams of graduating high school and attending college were on the verge of shattering. That was the defining moment that led me to an incredible testimony of God and Jesus Christ. I felt more love than I had felt in my entire life. I was comforted and knew that through my health trials, God was shaping me into an incredible person. Even though my struggles didn't go away, I could view my life in a more hopeful light. I began to have an overwhelming desire to help others who were dealing with similar problems. The people who know me know that I have dreamed of being an author since the moment I could pick up a pencil. I have written all kinds of stories. I even wrote a full-length novel in the two years I was sick, which turned into therapy sessions every time I wrote. Writing stopped being about creating a story and became much more. I wanted to inspire others through my writing. I write characters who suffer from physical or mental health problems that overcome them. I do this because I want to inspire those who have felt what these characters (and I) have felt. Writing while I was struggling healed me. I truly believe that writing is a talent given to me by God. One day I will write a book specifically about my health journey and what has given me hope so that I may pass a little bit of that hope onto others. Right now I am attending school at Brigham Young University studying Creative Writing as my major. I hope to be a best-selling author and editor. I know that I am only attending college today because of the many miracles of healing God blessed me with. The least I can do is share what He has done for me. I hope my writing will be a pathway for others to begin their journey of healing, and I know God will help me achieve it as I keep working hard to pursue this dream.

In 2020, my whole world shut down, and not to the COVID-19 pandemic. I was practically bedridden with neurological Lyme Disease, co-infections, and autoimmune conditions. My dreams of graduating high school and attending college to study creative writing were on the verge of shattering. Besides eating, sleeping, and going to doctor appointments, the only thing I did was write. I have wanted to be an author as long as I can remember, and I have written multiple novels. But suddenly, writing became so much more than creating a story. I wrote to take my mind away from the excruciating pain and depression I experienced daily. I put my conflicting emotions into the characters and lived through them. Doing so allowed me to process the whirlwind of emotions I was experiencing and understand what they were. I did everything I could to make my writing the best it could. I took masterclasses, watched YouTube tutorials, and read many books. If I couldn't get a professional education to be a better writer, I would do the best I could without it. While dealing with these health issues, I finished a full-length 130,000-word novel, nothing like I had ever written. My characters dealt with issues like grief, physical pain, and fear—everything I was experiencing at the time. My mental health greatly improved while writing the story. At the same time, my physical health improved because of the treatments I was doing, and I am proud to say that I graduated high school and started college at Brigham Young University. Finishing a full-length novel while bedridden is one of my greatest achievements, aside from improving my physical and mental health so I could function like a normal human being. If I ever feel discouraged, I look back on that time of my life and think, "If I could do that, I can do this too!" I am excited to complete my education at BYU and study under amazing authors like Brandon Sanderson. In my case success was not completing the novel, but pursuing my dreams even in the most difficult time of my life. I worked hard to learn and do what I loved, which led me to an amazing education, a finished story, and more to come. With the new skills I learn, I want to write a book about my health journey to inspire others to pursue their dreams. This is my new goal for success: through my writing, I can inspire and lift others, especially when they are discouraged, unmotivated, or feeling hopeless. I believe continuing my education at BYU in the English program will help me gain the skills to achieve this success. Although I am attending college, I still have some health issues that limit my ability to be full-functioning in classes. My family pays for a lot of medical bills and debt because of what I have been through, and because of it, we can barely afford tuition right now. But I'm confident that with the money from this scholarship, I will be able to pursue my dreams even further through education and inspire others because of it.

Playing the flute was always nothing more than a fun pasttime for me until 2020. I participated in band and marching band, solo nights, ensembles, and playing in church. I was first chair in band and had a love for the beautiful sound of the flute. But in April of 2020, everything changed. I was diagnosed with Neuroborreliosis, a disease that causes chronic fatigue and pain. I was constantly at doctors' offices getting IVs and in bed at home. At marching band, I had to take many breaks because of the debilitating pain in my abdomen. My junior year of high school was spent mostly online. I attended band in person, but it was often difficult to have the energy to play to the best of my ability. In 2021, I had to quit the marching band. Music was such an important part of my life, and losing that part of me was devastating. After many months of treatment, my health started improving. Although I could not march, I participated in the marching band by helping with the speakers and microphones. On the days that I was feeling well, I'd play my flute for hours at a time. My family didn't have money to take me to a therapist, so the emotions and thoughts I felt would weigh heavily on me. Playing beautiful music connected me to my emotions and helped me to express what I was feeling. It was a sort of therapy for me. Not only was playing my flute a wonderful coping mechanism and therapy, but it strengthened my lungs and muscles that were affected by Neuroborreliosis. The more I practiced, the stronger my body was becoming. In my free time I found solos I wanted to learn that I felt deeply connected to. As I practiced, I no longer felt the depression, anxiety, or grief that came from being chronically ill. The pain seemed to lessen or even go away at times. Once I was healthy enough to play through an entire song, I began performing in church again. I felt like I was sharing a part of myself with them through the music. Seeing the happy tears people shed in the audience made it even more meaningful. In April of 2023, I performed a solo for State Solo and Ensemble. I spent almost a full year preparing my body and skills to make it to state. I reminded myself that it was a miracle I was able to have the strength to do this, and that gave me a lot of peace. I played my solo from memory so I could close my eyes and connect with the music. Doing so helped me bring my emotions to the surface and allowed me to play with more expression. I completely lost myself in the performance and even had tears come to my eyes. The song felt like a tribute to how much I had been through and how far I had come. The judges gave me a 1 - the best score you can receive. Not only was I thrilled about my score, but I proved to myself that I could push myself and do hard things. Music has connected me to other people and helped me understand that everyone is going through some sort of pain, whether it be emotional or physical. I share my music so that they can experience the healing that it brought me during my health journey, and still brings me. Music also brings out the beauty in emotions. Love, sadness, joy, pain. We are meant to experience it all.

In 2020 I was diagnosed with seven different strains of Neuroborreliosis, a disease that makes it difficult to function physically and neurologically. I spent many hours a day in the doctor's office getting IVs and taking naps at home to catch up on rest. Besides the intense pain I experienced every day, brain fog and concentration were very bad symptoms. I barely made it through my sophomore year of high school and had to take a lot of junior year online. The physical toll of the disease eventually weighed heavily on my emotional health. Writing stories was one of the only things I could find true joy in. I have loved writing since I was a little kid. I have notebooks filled with stories and at least twenty documents of unfinished stories. There are even a few finished novel-length ones. Writing was and is a form of therapy for me. Transferring my emotions onto the page and writing about how I truly felt through my characters helped me to understand what I was feeling and let go of my frustrations. I started a novel about two characters who lost something they each loved most but who were able to find strength through their trials and fight for what they loved. Personally, losing my ability to go to school, a lot of social connections, and my physical functionality was devastating to me, but writing was one way I was able to feel hope. My brain fog seemed to disappear and I could write for hours on end, distracting me from pain and bringing me joy. I incorporated the growth of my characters into my own life and worked my hardest at doing treatments and getting rest to improve. Doing online school was a huge challenge, but I wouldn't give up. I couldn't give up when there was so much I lost that I could get back if I worked hard enough. Writing my book has taken a lot longer than it usually would because of my health struggles, but after two years I have written 100,000 words. I intend to write at least another 20,000 and publish my story by the end of this year. Not only have I made huge progress on my book, but I am once again able to function remarkably well physically and mentally. I am attending my senior year of high school in person and full-time, I participated in a full season of marching band, and I have lots more social connections that I have missed. Writing my book has been a victory for me because it's proof that I can do hard things even through very difficult times. Publishing this book will mean everything to me because of all the joy it brought me. After I graduate, I plan on going to college and studying English literature and creative writing as my major and editing as my minor. For years my life dream has been to become a best-selling author, but in the past two years, it has meant more to me than ever before. I want to inspire others to write their own stories and experience the joy and victory that I have felt. In so many ways, writing can heal and provide hope and connection. I plan on writing many more books and sharing this gift and talent that has become so important to me with the world.

As a flute player in high school, music has become a very important part of my life. I have been playing for seven years in our school's top band programs. Through music, I have learned how to connect with people and my emotions. Music brings me a lot of joy and I love sharing that joy with other people. In my community, I love to help and serve with my music skills. Recently I have been over at the junior high volunteering to judge solo night. I put my full effort into teaching what I've learned and giving positive feedback so these kids continue to love music and improve. Too often kids drop out of the music program because it's too frustrating or not interesting enough. Once in my early years of learning flute, I even considered doing the same thing. I want to inspire them so that our music community continues to grow and become phenomenal. In the Westlake Marching Thunder, I spent eight months running the sound equipment. Before I joined the marching band, I was very sick with a chronic illness. After two years of treatment, I have significantly improved, but it was still really hard for me to do physical stuff. Even standing in the sun for a very long time took a lot of energy. I marched in the band as a flute player in 2020 and I desperately wanted to be part of that again because I loved music and the band family. Although I wasn't physically able to march, my band director offered me a position to work the sound equipment. I knew nothing about it, but one of the staff members taught me throughout the season how to balance the sound of the band, hook up different instruments and sound effects to the synth, get the speakers running and sounding good, etc. Practices were spent in the sun running long cords back and forth between speakers and the front ensemble. Every day was a physical challenge for me. However, I kept going and pushing through because it's what I loved. The music community gives me purpose and feels like family. Although I could not play music, I enjoyed helping the band sound good. We performed at many competitions throughout the state and took 2nd several times. We even took a Visual Caption award at BOA finals, something that hasn't happened for a long time. All of our directors, staff members, and judges said that this was the best the Westlake Marching Thunder band has been in years, and the sound equipment was a crucial part of that. I am so glad I got to contribute to the band in a meaningful way. Although I'm about to graduate high school, I plan on helping the band every year and contributing what I've learned to the music community. Music is a huge part of our city in Saratoga Springs. We have one of the best high school band programs in the state. In our high school Wind Symphony I had the opportunity to be section leader and run practices so that we can improve. Last year we were able to go to Boston, Massachusetts and perform. I know a lot of that was because of the hard work we put into the music. Change always requires hard work. I have learned that in many aspects of my life, especially through health challenges and music. I hope to continue to inspire others to love music and put in the work so that they can experience the connection and joy I feel through music as well.

Even though I always say, “Fill in the blank” is the worst symptom of Neuroborreliosis, like the fatigue or sleepless nights, it’s really not true. If someone were to ask me what the worst part of having a chronic illness is, it’s feeling like I’m letting people down, even the people who would do anything for you. It’s a large task, having to keep up with others expectations while trying to keep up with yourself. You want to get things done and be productive, but you can’t. My friend Dilynn said it this way: “It’s like you are trapped inside a cage without a key. In order to get anywhere (emotionally or physically), you have to push the cage and drag it around with you wherever you go. The weight forces you. The pressure changes you and limits what you used to love to do. The metal bars surrounding you kill you inside.” Say your friends are joking around with you at school. You still feel lonely. They give you a hug, but you can’t feel the love. You smile and try to be yourself, but you have forgotten what it feels like to feel free. They can’t see your cage - it’s invisible. Why would you want to burden others by telling them what you’re feeling? Why would you “give them” your cage? This is how I used to think, unfortunately. I was always so afraid I was burdening other people by talking about my problems. I kept all my feelings and emotions trapped Inside the cage with me. As time went by, the cage felt even more small and enclosed and heavy. This was not fun at all. I talked to my mom about this one night. She told me to stop pretending like I’m not struggling, and to just be myself. So I tried this. Slowly, I shared some things with my friends about how I’m feeling and what my illness feels like. I didn’t feel worse - I actually felt better! I felt like a heavy burden was lifted from my shoulders. I wasn’t complaining about my struggles, but I was able to show my friends and family a little bit of the cage I am in, and I was able to see more of their cages too. I was able to lift their cages and help support them, now that I felt more free. It helped to express what I was feeling. It’s now a coping mechanism for me when I’m feeling down. Talk to somebody you trust. For me, it’s my wonderful mom and my buddy who also has Neuroborreliosis, Dilynn. They are both very understanding and compassionate. They don’t feel burdened when I talk about my struggles. If somebody acts burdened when you talk about your pain, find someone else to talk to who really cares! We all need to be here for each other and express what we are going through if healing is going to be possible. And don’t only help others, but let them help you. It’s okay to let somebody help you with a struggle. You’re not being a burden, but you are giving them an opportunity to serve someone in need. Because of the strength I’ve gained from going through a chronic illness, I want to share what I’ve learned. I dream of being an author one day, and I’m writing a book on my experiences so that others like me don’t feel so alone in their struggles. I intend to publish it throughout the world so I can help others know the happiness I’ve learned to have.

In 2020, my life went from active and carefree to ruined, and not because of the Covid pandemic. I was driven to the hospital at 12am in the most extreme pain. A few weeks later it was presumed by the OBGYN that I had endometriosis. It’s shameful for me to say that I lived for an entire year off of ibuprofen. I could barely walk some days, and going to school was the equivalent of scaling a mountain every day. I was constantly out of school to rest and deal with the excruciating pain at home. Around the same time I was diagnosed with neurological Lyme disease and seven other co-infections. This caused overwhelming amounts of fatigue, migraines, and nerve pain. Because my whole family had grown up with Lyme, including me, we were a little bit more prepared on how to handle the situation. My Lyme doctor started me on some intense protocols to help me prepare for the SOT treatment, a killing protocol for Lyme. Kind of considered “the cure.” SOTs are also made to reduce specific cancers, so it’s really intense. I was gone from my house 24/7, except at night, hooked up to IVs for hours and driving between several doctors offices. This took a heavy toll on my mental health. My mom told me that I still had a choice whether I wanted to do this or not. After all, she was pouring money into these treatments with only hope they would help. I told her that no matter what, I was willing to do whatever it took to be healthy again. I took my junior year of high school online because I was too sick to attend in person. I spent this time at doctors offices, and at home my free time was spent doing other treatments. It was exhausting. Within a month of the healthy diet my doctor started me on, I could already tell a difference. I wasn’t to the point of puking every time I took a bite. I was able to walk with significantly less pain in my abdomen, and I had feeling in my hands. This gave me a lot of hope. Even though I knew the road ahead of me was a long one, I was determined to get better. When I had energy I started going on walks. These helped me get some movement in. At first even a 10-minute walk was super hard for me, but eventually I was able to go to 20 minutes, then 40. Because Lyme disease eats up sugar, I’ve had to cut it out. At first it was very hard to avoid, but now it doesn’t tempt me. I have been able to maintain a healthy diet, and I have seen significant improvements in my health because of it. Not too long ago I was able to receive six SOTs! It took a large toll on my fatigue and pain for a while, but now I feel better than I have in years. I can’t imagine where I’d be with my health if I told my mom that I wasn’t willing to do what it took to get better. I might be bedridden. I want to end with saying that through my health journey I’ve learned that the body is a very special thing. Treat it with care. I used to take it for granted before I realized how much I am grateful for a functioning body every day, even if it still has problems. I’m proud to say I will be going back to school full-time for my senior year!

During my sophomore year I was diagnosed with a few autoimmune diseases that caused a lot of inflammation in my body. Because of my health challenges it was painful to do anything, even walk. I went to the doctor’s office five times a week to receive treatments and IVs, anything that would help. One of my treatments involved a couple diets. The hardest diet was no-sugar. I am definitely a sugar lover! But with hard work and persistence I was able to go off of sugar for more than a year! My doctor did a test on me called ALCAT, which tested my blood for which foods caused inflammation and which ones didn’t. This came back with results I had never anticipated. For example, shrimp and avocado apparently caused severe inflammation in my body! How strange! I followed this diet for a year. My mom supported everything I did and even went off of sugar with me. She made me meals every night that took up hours of her time. For a long time I could only eat healthy foods. Salads, chicken, egg whites, some nuts, and sweet potatoes were a constant food source for me. After a few months I realized I hated the taste of sugar, now that I hadn’t been exposed to it for a long time. Even the thought of sugar made me nauseous. I found myself craving salad and good, healthy superfoods. I knew how good they were making me feel and I wanted to continue eating them. After a year I went back and did the ALCAT test again. This time there were many more foods that I could eat. My doctor said that because I reduced a lot of the inflammation in my body, I could now eat a lot more food. I was so grateful to add in avocado and nuts back into my diet! They are still my favorite superfoods because they make me feel really good. Now that I’m a lot healthier and I can eat a bigger variety of foods, I still feel so icky when I sneak in some sugar. How is sugar worth it to people, I wonder? Does our society realize what they are putting into their bodies? I really hope that one day we will be able to eliminate a lot of the sugar we eat, but for now I’ll sit back and enjoy being healthy!

In the summer of 2020 I was diagnosed with endometriosis, a debilitating medical condition that made it painful to walk, stand, sit, literally do anything. I was on ibuprofen multiple times a day for months. This made it really hard to pay attention in school, and even show up to school. I’d walk out of class with intense migraines, or be doubled over in so much pain it brought me to tears. I hated when others could tell I was in pain, so trying to mask the pain on my face made me feel even sicker. Not only was I in extreme pain throughout my sophomore year, but I also had chronic fatigue. I would unintentionally fall asleep in classes, and when I got home I’d take naps anywhere from 1-3 hours. Sometimes those naps weren’t planned, and I’d fall asleep on accident. This made it very hard to get homework done, and understand what I was learning in class. Nevertheless, I persisted, and with a lot of extra credit opportunities from my teachers I was able to pass my sophomore year. I got through a full year of marching band as well, while pushing through the worst pains. Junior year was even worse, unfortunately. I did more than half my classes at home online because I didn’t have the energy to attend in person. Reading was a struggle for me because I kept dozing off, so I got really far behind in math, history and English. I attended band in person, but even there I had little energy to play my flute. I had to drop out of marching band 2021 because it was too physical for my body to handle. I could’ve let all my health challenges bog me down and give up, but I fought back. I went to the doctors office multiple times a week to do treatments and IVs that sometimes took hours to finish. With determination I kept doing them, even though I wanted to stop. I wondered if they were doing anything for me. It would take time before I saw any results. My mom was my biggest support! She went on the no-sugar and no-grain diets with me that I had to go on in order for my body to function. She drove me 50 minutes away to the doctors multiple times a week, despite how much she hated driving, and sat with me through some embarrassing treatments that I would rather have not done. With all that she had done for me, I did not want to quit. The pain also drove my motivation. I was ready to be pain-free and I would do whatever it took to get rid of it. To feel normal again. To be able to go to school, pass my classes, and have energy to be with my friends. Right now it’s the summer before my senior year and I’ve fought with all my might. I’m proud to say that I have half of the pain I used to, and 60% more stamina. Although the school is technically over, I’m working hard to complete math and history online so I’m ready for next year. And guess what? I’m planning on returning full time for my senior year and be part of the marching band! When I go to college I want to study writing. I really want to be an author someday and incorporate my experiences into my books. I’d love to write a book about my health challenges and what helped me cope, have motivation, and push through in the hardest times of my life.

“Music is a piece of art that goes in the ears, straight to the heart.” -Unknown. Music is the most important form of art to me. Through my battles with health challenges in my life, music has helped heal the parts of me that medicine cannot fix. Music connects me to my emotions and gives me a way to let myself express those emotions. As a junior in high school I have played the flute for almost 7 years now. I started out in elementary band with that beginner blue flute! Now I am in my top high school band as one of the best flute players in the school. The graceful flute sounds as well as amazing guidance from my band directors and teachers have inspired my love for music and is one of the anchors keeping me grounded in the chaotic moments of my life. Because I’m a band student, my heart is in instrumental and orchestral music. My favorite wine piece of all time is called Song for Lyndsay. It’s a beautiful piece for band that features beautiful solos from the flute and French horn. Song for Lyndsay is a very calming, yet sad piece. The chords and note progressions make your heartstrings pull and your eyes tear up. But despite the sadness of the song, it’s also very beautiful. The melancholy parts swell into happy phrases and the instruments play soothing melodies. I compare Song for Lyndsay to my life a lot. Because of my chronic illness, it’s easy to feel sad and hopeless. But there are beautiful aspects of my life too! I can only become a better person by overcoming my challenges, just as the music gets happier after the sad parts. I connect personally to this song, it truly is a masterpiece.

Life is good. But sometimes we forget. As a girl with a chronic illness, I know what pain feels like. I live every day with extreme fatigue that I can’t control, and pain that often brings me to tears. For a long time I felt like giving up on life. That would be the easy option. As I’ve pushed through my trials I’ve come to realize life-changing truths that I couldn’t have learned without positivity and hope. I received so many blessings, love, and care while I was in my sickest moments. The most important thing I learned through my trials is this simple yet powerful truth: Life is good! I could focus on the bad parts of my day. The sleepless nights, nausea, exhaustion. But when I look at the world with a positive perspective and an open mind, the good far outweighs the bad! I have a caring family, good friends, a roof over my head, money for treatments and food, dedicated doctors, medicine that helps my body function. I could go on and on. These blessings help me cope with pain and sadness because it gives me hope, hope that there is always something to look forward to, even if it’s small. And those small things make all the difference. This all started when a girl in my neighborhood told me about her positivity journal. Every day she’d write something she was thankful for. I thought that was something I needed, so I started a journal as well. Suddenly life wasn’t as terrible as I thought! I can promise anyone who is going through tough times that focusing on the good parts of life can get you through. It doesn’t mean it makes the bad things disappear, but it certainly makes them a little less hard.

“Cherish your friends and family as if your life depended on it. Because it does.” -Ann Richards When I was a kid, oh how I wished I was a teenager! Now I’m a teenager, and I can’t wait to become an adult! But as the months fly by and the time to leave the house is coming up, I’ve realized how much I’ve taken my young life for granted. I find myself thinking, “I wish I could be a kid again!” and enjoy the innocence of being young. The world didn’t seem so rough back then. I’ve come to realize how fast time flies. People change, circumstances change, and we change. Before Covid I would always be at my friends’ houses, but now I don’t remember the last time I walked up to their door. My brother shot up at least a foot and he’s taller than me now. My little brother is going into 6th grade! I’m leaving in one year. What have I been doing with my life? To make my life more meaningful, I’ve dedicated my time to cherishing every moment. Sometimes we only know people for a short time before they aren’t in our lives anymore, so we have to seize the opportunity and get to know them! Others are in our lives for a long time, and yet we don’t show enough appreciation for them. My brothers and I used to hate each other. We would fight over the simple things every day. Through this challenge to cherish them that I made for myself, my brothers and I are now best friends. We hardly ever argue, we give each other advice, talk happily together, and schedule time for each other! I only have 60-80 more years to live. I better make the most of it!

You can do service without loving someone. But you can’t love someone without doing service. My love-language is giving gifts. I show my appreciation for people through service and gifts, even just to brighten someone’s day. I have come to know throughout my life that there are people silently struggling all around me that could use my love. There’s a quote I love by Henry B. Eyring. He said, “When you meet someone, treat them as if they were in serious trouble, and you will be right more than half the time.” Ever since I heard him say this, I have kept it in my heart and have been more dedicated to serving others. As someone who has gone through multiple autoimmune diseases, I know the power of giving. Every time someone brought by a gift or showed love towards me, it meant the world. I want to pass on that love and help others as much as I can. My favorite act of service is a gift basket. I love preparing baskets for my friends, people in my neighborhood, or those who I know are struggling. It’s cute and inexpensive. I always try to include a notebook and multiple self-care products. Sometimes, writing your feelings down really helps with the pain. Caring for yourself is very important as well. Then of course, a treat, because everyone needs to enjoy food every once in a while. I never know how much my gift impacted that person, but that isn’t really the point. It wasn’t really about the gift basket. I gave the gift of love, and love always finds a way to a person’s heart, even if it’s your own. I hope to inspire others to serve because people need to learn this simple truth: Showing love ALWAYS means something.

“Thank you” isn’t something common you hear these days. There are many reasons why people don’t say thank you—they could be prideful, or embarrassed, or they could just forget. I didn’t realize how important the words were to me until recently. In 2020, my life shut down. I was awoken in the night with terrible pain in my abdomen. My mom rushed me to the hospital at midnight. The emergency room couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me. They gave me pain medication and sent me home. The pain never went away. Soon after I was diagnosed with endometriosis, I was diagnosed with Lyme disease. We searched for doctors all over the U.S. who could help us. My mom did countless research and stayed up for hours every night finding what I could do for treatment. A year of constant caring for me (I had to stay home from school all the time), my mom finally found a doctor she could take me to who helped my health improve greatly over a few months. Without the constant pain distracting me from what mattered, I finally opened my eyes and realized…my mom was awesome! She had not only spent tens of thousands of dollars on me, but also spent all her time dedicated to seeing me without pain. She constantly reminded me how much she loves me. I learned something I wouldn’t have without being in that situation. People are struggling all around us, and we have to show love to know they can do this. Gratitude is our way of showing that the love they offer means something to us, and often, it’s all we can do. If “thank you” is all I can do while I’m in pain to show love, I’m saying it all the time.

100 acts of kindness in one week. Doesn’t sound too hard, right? Well…it’s a lot harder than you may think. Society today doesn’t spend as much time going out of our way to serve as we should. On Monday I challenged myself to do 100 acts of kindness by the end of the week. That’s about 15 per day. To be honest, I struggled finding ways to serve people. I found a video on YouTube by Thoraya Maronesy about how she served others. It really inspired me on not only how I could serve, but how much of an impact those acts of kindness had on people. I began putting up inspiring messages in the bathroom stalls at school, complimenting people I did/didn’t know. I made a gift basket for a struggling friend and put hearts on doors around the neighborhood. Many of these things would be considered “lame” by my fellow teenagers, but I actually found myself a lot happier after doing these things. My acts of kindness meant something! The girl I gave a gift to said that it was the best thing that happened to her all month. The old lady next door cooked us a meal because of the gratitude she had for the hearts on her door. I was also rewarded for my kindness! I have a cousin I haven’t talked to in a while who called me that week to catch up and ask me how I was doing. It meant the world to me, because now I knew we were both still close. A simple act of kindness can mean so much in a person’s life. Maya Angelou said, “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

If you asked one of my friends about me, they would say, “Josie is a band kid.” “She’s a flautist.” “She has an autoimmune disease.” Sure, all of these things are true, but they don’t define me. In 2020 I signed up for marching band at my high school. I really enjoyed it! I made many friends and learned important life skills, not to mention I had a ton of fun! But then at the end of the year, I got really sick. In 2021, I was not able to sign up for marching band because physically, I had a very limited amount of energy. This destroyed me. I was devastated that I couldn’t be marching and playing with the band. All my friends got to participate, but I could not. I didn’t even have the energy to take private lessons for flute anymore. I reflected my feelings to my mom one night. She told me I could cry and do nothing about it, or I could work towards being able to attend again. This made me realize it wasn’t the end of the world. I might be able to do marching band again, but I would have to work hard. I spent many hours every week at the doctor, getting IVs, and staying up on supplements and sleep at home. It was exhausting, but I wouldn’t let myself give up. I’m not completely better, but I have way more endurance and less pain than before. The only reason I’ve improved is because of the determination that kept me going. I would never let myself give up. I’m happy to say that because of my efforts, I’m marching again in 2022. I love to March and play flute, but it’s only through determination that I’m able to do those things.

Living with an autoimmune disease is not very motivating, let me tell you. For almost two years now, I’ve been living with the same autoimmune disease that I had for the first ten years of my life. Unfortunately, I have been in this mindset that having health problems means I’ll be less successful in my life. After struggling with this for a long time, my mindset finally changed. Let me tell you how. What keeps me motivated is the fact that if I keep up on my treatments, healthy eating and walking, someday I will be healthy. I’ll be able to go on hikes, eat sugar every once in a while, and enjoy my evenings without pain. Even though those things are very overwhelming and even crushing, I’m ready to prove to the world that I’m not defined my the limits of my health. I’m a very determined person. I love challenging tasks and working through them because I cherish the joy that comes from accomplishing something hard. But my health isn’t the only thing I’m working through. I am an author. I love to write fantasy and dystopian stories. Right now, I’m 130 pages through a novel that I’m determined to publish, even if it’s through self-publishing. Publishing a book will be a huge mile stone for me. It will show myself that I can do hard things, even through difficult circumstances. I want to show others that they can accomplish seemingly-impossible tasks even when it’s hard! Because there is no limit to your determination. After all this is done and I’m free of my health problems, I want to write a book about what I’ve learned through my struggles to motivate others and reassure them that they are not alone.

Practicing an instrument is never fun. It isn't supposed to be fun...right? I've been playing the flute since 5th grade. So far, that's six years of my life. I'm in the top band program at my school, and I've even made 1st chair. I have really enjoyed playing my flute throughout elementary, junior high, and high school, but I don't know if I can say I've loved it until this year. A couple months ago, my band director announced that solo night is coming up! I had to find a solo to play in front of judges - which is a bit terrifying to me. With dread, I started searching. All the solos I found were either too short, too long, too hard, or too easy. I was really struggling to find something I actually wanted to play. Then I stumbled across a composer named Herman Beeftink. He writes beautiful pieces for piano and accompaniment for other instruments. I decided to listen to one of his arrangements for flute called "Summer." My first thought was, "Uh, this is WAY too hard for me to play!" But I kept dreaming of how much I'd love to perform that piece. So I set to work. Yes, the music was very hard at first. But as I spent more time, I actually got really good at it, to the point that I was ready to perform. Not only did I really enjoy practicing because I loved the music, but accomplishing something that was very challenging made me so proud of myself! Working on hard music and being able to perform makes me very happy. Performing was very scary at first, but I've learned to love it through my hard work and persistence! (Thank you Herman Beeftink, for your beautiful arrangements).

As a woodwind player, I absolutely love good orchestral pieces that depict how beautiful the woodwinds can sound. Not everyone loves instrumental pieces, but I've learned to really appreciate that kind of music. Hearing all the instruments blend together and compliment each others sound makes me feel connected as I play, especially when I can express emotion through a song. My favorite orchestral piece to listen to is called Theme of Love - Distant Worlds. The song is originally from a video game, Final Fantasy IV, but the song was written for an orchestra and it sounds so beautiful. The dynamics, the balance between high and low instruments, and the movement of the piece brings it to life. I'm not an oboe player, but I understand that the oboe is a very difficult instrument. It's so exciting to find a piece of music with an amazing oboe solo. This piece of music expresses the beauty of the instrument and how much emotion can be felt through the powerful, bright sound of the oboe. One of my favorite things to hear in a song is when two instruments switch off playing. In Theme of Love, the flute and the oboe switch off between the melody throughout the piece. I imagine as if the two instruments are having a conversation, and they are taking turns sharing a part of their story. I am a flute player, and this song really inspires me to keep on playing because of how it is portrayed in this piece. The way the piece rises and falls through the song makes the piece very intriguing to listen to. I get shivers every time I listen to the climax of the song. I hope anyone listening to this song can enjoy it as much as I do!

"When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you'll never get back. Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time." - Rick Warren. With easy access to technology all around us, less time is being spent with loved ones. Most people would say that a quick text is easier than a phone-call. Even I would rather text someone than call them first. Last month, my brother needed to ask his friend a question. It was a really quick question, something that could be easily answered over text. But he called his friend without even thinking twice, and they chatted for several minutes before hanging up. That simple act has inspired me to be more social with others. My challenge to myself was to reach out to someone new every day, from my best friends to the people I rarely talked to. I went on a walk with a girl from my neighborhood and got to know her a little better. I played a board game with my brother when he was begging me to play. I reached out to a girl I hadn't seen at church in a while. Even if these interactions didn't mean a whole lot to those people, I know it impacted me. I've learned about myself when I serve the people around me. I have a friend who always texts me just at the right moment. Either I'm feeling sick, or stressed, or just very lonely, and somehow she just knows. It makes me so happy whenever she reaches out. That little act can mean so much to someone, and I love sharing that love with others.

I’ve been writing fantasy stories since I was a little girl. Fantasy has always made me so intrigued because of the endless creativity that can go into the story. What do I love about writing? There is no limit to what you can write about! Because of my health problems, it’s very hard to go outside and be active. I spend most of my time writing. Not only is it fun, but therapeutic and challenging as well. Here are some ways I am learning to build my skill as a writer. I write almost every day so I can improve my skills. A writer can’t be good at writing if they don’t write a lot. The same goes with reading. There are so many types of writing out there, and to get a feel of what good writing looks like, I’ve been reading a lot of books! I’ll even read the genres I’m not as interested in, because maybe someday I will want to write a story like that. Good authors aren’t publishing on their own. Most of them have writing coaches to help them improve and be the best writer they can be. I signed up for a subscription to MasterClass and have been listening to a plethora of authors give their advice. But you don’t always have to pay to get this advice—there are tons of resources on the internet from world-famous authors that have really inspired my writing. I want to share my love of writing and inspire young people like me to write as well! There are a lot of ways you can get inspiration, but the most important one is definitely to read! Read read read, and you’ll start to get those epic story ideas that you just have to write down and share!

Even though I always say, “Fill in the blank” is the worst symptom of Lyme Disease, like the fatigue or sleepless nights, it’s really not true. If someone were to ask me what the worst part of having a chronic illness is, it’s feeling like I’m letting people down, even the people who would do anything for you. It’s a large task, having to keep up with others expectations while trying to keep up with yourself. You want to get things done and be productive, but you can’t. My friend Dilynn said it this way: “It’s like you are trapped inside a cage without a key. In order to get anywhere (emotionally or physically), you have to push the cage and drag it around with you wherever you go. The weight forces you. The pressure changes you and limits what you used to love to do. The metal bars surrounding you kill you inside.” Say your friends are joking around with you at school. You still feel lonely. They give you a hug, but you can’t feel the love. You smile and try to be yourself, but you have forgotten what it feels like to feel free. They can’t see your cage - it’s invisible. Why would you want to burden others by telling them what you’re feeling? Why would you “give them” your cage? This is how I used to think, unfortunately. I was always so afraid I was burdening other people by talking about my problems. I kept all my feelings and emotions trapped Inside the cage with me. As time went by, the cage felt even more small and enclosed and heavy. This was not fun at all. I talked to my mom about this one night. She told me to stop pretending like I’m not struggling, and to just be myself. So I tried this. Slowly, I shared some things with my friends about how I’m feeling and what Lyme feels like to me. I didn’t feel worse - I actually felt better! I felt like a heavy burden was lifted from my shoulders. I wasn’t complaining about my struggles, but I was able to show my friends and family a little bit of the cage I am in, and I was able to see more of their cages too. I was able to lift their cages and help support them, now that I felt more free. It helped to express what I was feeling. It’s now a coping mechanism for me when I’m feeling down. Talk to somebody - someone you trust. For me, it’s my wonderful mom and my Lyme buddy, Dilynn. They are both really understanding and compassionate. They don’t feel burdened when I talk about my struggles. If somebody acts burdened or hurt when you talk about your pain, find someone else to talk to who really cares! We all need to be here for each other and express what we are going through if healing is going to be possible. And not only help heal others, but let them help you. It’s okay to let somebody help you with a struggle. You’re not being a burden, but you are giving them an opportunity to serve someone in need. Because of the strength I’ve gained from going through Lyme, I want to share what I’ve learned with others. I’m writing a book that I’m going to call, “The Cage of Chronic Illness,” so that others like me don’t feel so alone in their struggles. I intend to publish it throughout the world so I can help others experience the happiness I have.

I started writing stories when I was very young. I wrote about my dolls, mermaids, unicorns, practically everything that girls love. I wrote whatever popped into my brain, and I wasn’t scared of what people thought. That love of writing has turned into a dream. I’ve turned simple stories into 300-page books ready to be published. Writing fantasy is so enjoyable because it’s such a broad topic, and there is no limit to my creativity. There are endless possibilities, and there won’t ever be too many stories that you won’t be able to think of a good idea. For many people including myself, writing is therapeutic. I express my anger that is bottled up inside by writing about a character with those same emotions. By writing in my highest and lowest moments, I feel connected to my characters in a way that makes them real to me. Then, when I’m done writing for the day, I feel happier than before. Not only was I able to get out my emotions, but I created more relatable characters because they express the same emotions as real people. Now, back to my writings as a kid. Those stories were definitely childish, and I’ve come a long way since then. However, what I lack now was that mindset I had when I wrote those stories—I wasn’t afraid of what people thought. That is the special thing about kids—they don’t dwell on how other people are judging them. My goal this year is to be like that little girl I once was, and to forget about judgments and people who don’t like my ideas. I write because I love to write, not for praise or fame. Someday, I hope to publish my stories to show others how much fun it is to be yourself!