I give back in ways that feel real and close to my daily life, not as a project, but as a habit. One place this shows up is chess. I taught chess to senior residents who came for more than the game. Many of them wanted a steady social anchor, a reason to leave the room, sit across from someone, and be seen. Chess gave us structure, but the real value was the time together. I learned to slow down, listen, and meet people where they were. Some students cared about openings and tactics, but most cared about routine, laughter, and feeling sharp for one more hour. I showed up each week because showing up is the point. Whenever someone would tell me they practiced during the week, I knew it was about having something to look forward to. I also volunteered at a food bank. The work itself was simple like sorting, packing, handing out food, keeping the line moving. What stayed with me was how normal it all looked from the outside and how heavy it felt on the inside. One day I saw a classmate there getting food. I did not say anything. They did not say anything. We both understood what it meant. It was a moment that cut through my assumptions. Someone in need can be sitting right there, next to you in your classroom. That day made service personal. It also made my goals sharper. In the future, I plan to impact the world by building steady support systems, not one time gestures. In the short term, I will keep working with people who feel isolated, especially older adults, by creating small groups that meet around games and problem solving. I want those spaces to feel safe, simple, and consistent, because consistency builds trust. I also plan to keep supporting food access work, but with a bigger focus on dignity, like helping reduce wait times, improving distribution flow, and making it easier for students to find help without shame. I want a career where I solve hard problems that affect real lives. I study math because it teaches clean thinking under pressure. I want to use that skill in work that improves access: access to education, to basic needs, to stable housing. I do not think impact has to be loud to matter. I think it has to be honest, repeatable, and aimed at people who get overlooked.

Being a first generation college student influences my career goals because I seek challenge and prestige. Its not about winning, its about winning by a mile. Its one of the reasons why I am taking math for my degree to pursue a career in either Investment banking, software engineering, private equity or maybe even pivot into Med School. I want my family members to be thoroughly impressed, to show them what is possible and that we have so much potential. Being a first generation college student influences my career goals through financial motivation. There was a point where we were relying on the government for food. We had to walk miles upon miles everyday to get to our destination. I remember memories of when I was younger and my mom being pregnant, walking 10 miles with me and pushing a stroller just so she could see a doctor. I understand the struggle which is why I am financially motivated. I want to support the future of my family. Being a first generation college student influences my career goals because I am curious, naturally thriving on through this opportunity given to me by education through my curiosity. I also want a career where I can learn everyday and be fascinated everyday equally. I want to have a career that doesn't feel like its a career because its mentally stimulating and gives my. curiosity a sense of purpose.

"It is no longer a question of imitation, nor duplication, nor even parody. It is a question of substituting the signs of the real for the real itself; that is, an operation of deterring every real process by its operational double, a metastable, programmatic, perfectly descriptive machine that offers all the signs of the real and short circuits all its vicissitudes." -Jean Baudrillard, Simulacra and Simulation 1981, 2nd page, mid second paragraph Signs replacing what they mean: Baudrillard opens with what sounds like a riddle, what happens when the "signs of the real" take the place of the real itself? His claim is unsettling but its the truth. He's saying we slowly stop noticing that it’s gone. In his view, imitation used to point toward something real like a painting mimicked a landscape, a photograph captured a moment. But he argues that now what we see, share, and even feel are replicas without originals. Imitation turns into substitution. This sounds dramatic but if you take into consideration the example of social media, whats "authentic" is basically a rehearsal to introduce a filtered and algorithmically timed reality that we double tap like as if it were the true reference the original. Our reality is warped using another for reference. Options for reality: Baudrillard’s “operational double” isn’t a philosophical abstraction at all. It’s the world’s new operating system. Think about how companies sell "experiences' now: Disney, Apple, Meta. Each one builds an immersive copy of reality, a version you could argue, slightly better than life itself. You wear meta glasses and are virtually standing next your buddy who is a character that doesn't look at all like him in real life, is this your perception of your friend now? You scroll through someone’s travel vlog and feel like you were there (minus the heat and travel). I remember when I wanted to go to South Korea last year, I was increasing my faith in a way that motivated me to afford a trip to South Korea (saving, selling items online, working more jobs)... As soon as I clicked on a "walk through Korea pov" video on youtube I was hooked and I felt satisfied with that experience and I have not been to Korea (lol). But this convenience hides something darker. When the copy becomes more satisfying than reality, the original loses its authority. We don’t trust direct experience anymore because we trust the screen’s version of it. Reality becomes optional and usually the most difficult and effortful option to realize. Machines represent truth: Baudrillard calls this new order "a perfectly descriptive machine." It doesn’t distort reality, it improves it. 4K resolution, with perfect lighting, and an algorithmic rhythm designed to hold your attention. There is nothing evil controlling the machine that controls you, this is simply what you want and the machine gives it to you. We tend to attach ourselves to meaning. So, we attach ourselves to signs like the brand that "represents us," the photo that "captures”who we are. In that sense, Baudrillard diagnoses media and human insecurity, that of our constant need to anchor ourselves to something recognizable, even if it’s hollow. Its possible that humans really just find comfort in simulation. Faith vs simulation: Baudrillard’s idea almost mirrors how belief systems work. Faith, like simulation, builds symbolic frameworks to make sense of existence. Both are methods of escaping without understanding reality as it is. Both rely on signs and rituals, one connects us to mystery while the other sterilizes it. The difference is that Faith seeks transcendence from the world while simulation seeks to replace it. Solution: Baudrillard doesn't offer a solution, he rather explains what is happening in the real world and leaves the reader to imagine. If this is within our nature and we seem to enjoy this process then the "solution" might actually be the problem. This book I actually haven't finished, I'm currently on page 56. I really like to take my time to digest books which is why I read so slow. There are times where I am so inspired by the process of the literature that im reading (words evoke ideas that provoke emotions and imagination) that I just jot down all my thoughts like brain vomit. Thanks for this opportunity.

To me, being a first generation student is a step forward to continue to break barriers that were thought of as impossible to break. Being a first generation Mexican student means carrying two stories at once. The one my parents hold, their unfinished dreams and my own unsteady steps toward something they never got to touch. Both of my parents didn’t finish high school until they were 21. My dad likes to say we’re "regular, hardworking people", and he’s partially right because there’s always that pause after as if that’s all we were meant to be. Maybe we are not only just "hardworking regular people", maybe I can show that there is potential for more. It hasn’t been easy. I’ve been homeless more than once, doing homework in cars and libraries that closed too early. When you grow up like that, education stops being about grades it becomes survival, proof that you can turn struggle into skill. Still, there’s a strange pressure in being "the first". You’re figuring things out as you go, translating not just words but worlds like FAFSA forms, college jargon, expectations... I mean I didn't even apply for college to begin with because no one told me how and I expected someone to help me. Yet, those moments of uncertainty built me. I learned to adapt, to think critically, to stay grounded when everything around me shifted. My dream is to study math so I can transition into a field of Finance or Software engineering, I already have made several projects in both fields using programming languages I learned on my own outside of school. The ultimate goal of course is to create a perpetual impact to those around me and those in need of it. This scholarship would mean a chance to breathe, to keep going without constantly worrying about rent or tuition. More than that, it’d mean someone believes that all this effort, the late nights, the questions and the lonely persistence actually matters ...because it does. I’ve come too far not to believe that.

This was truly inspired by a book I recently read called, "The conspiracy against the human race" by Thomas Ligotti. I had no idea what I wanted to do for this scholarship but the book popped in my head as it is fresh in memory, as you can imagine it is full of pessimism, anti natalism, determinism etc. Its really a philosophical debate against human existence. The part to mash it up was water and this so happened to be because I was drinking a lot of water today. No one would've guessed that. Just so happened to influence me and my actions, much like the book... conspiracy? This sounds very suspicious. Anyways, in this poem, I merged the ideas of pessimism and determinism with the metaphor of water. Water became a stand in for the forces beyond human control. Its the inevitability of nature, the weight of existence, (possibly interpreted as a form of genetic determinism with my ambiguous ending), and the pressures that pull people toward outcomes they cannot avoid. The narrative moves from small, personal gestures like a small glass to large bodies of water, whispering to a pebble to placing a stone to broader, almost cosmic forces waves crashing, tides rising. I was trying to create a layered mashup of human effort versus the unstoppable forces of the universe (or man himself) using water and determinism/pessimism as the examples. This is something I actually enjoyed doing, at first my poem was more simple, it made dry jokes about water while still containing the same topics but after a few edits it was like a mix of comedy and despair which was truly absurd. I preferred to keep the tone the current version has. Sorta like a magical realism? Its possible that radiohead may have inspired this poem slightly. One of their songs which is my favorite, "Weird fishes", which is about water and fishes but its more ambiguous, one could interpret it as acceptance of suicide and transcendence while others might interpret it as following a love. I love the usage of metaphors and ambiguity as it leaves the reader/listener with nothing but their imagination. Thanks for this opportunity, this is the first time I wrote a poem in a while and I really enjoyed it.

I’ll admit it’s probably not what people expect when they find out I’m a guy who listens to Sabrina Carpenter. I first saw her back when she was on Disney Channel, and at the time I didn’t think much of it, just another show I’d watch with my sister while pretending I wasn’t invested. But years later, seeing her evolve from a child actor into a confident, lyrically witty, and self-aware artist has been genuinely inspiring. What stands out to me about Sabrina isn’t just her music, but how she’s handled growth and public perception from such a young age. She’s been through criticism, comparisons, and all the noise that comes with fame, but she never seems to lose her humor or her edge and shes only a few years older than me. I don't know if I would be able to handle that. The process of Sabrina carpenter is an evolution of identity without conformity. One of my favorite songs is "please please please" which reminds me of "please please please, let me get what I want" (deftones version). The begging that I sometimes interpret as a playful and sometimes as a desperate. Its versatile to emotions. Aside from all that, her songs are so catchy that they play in my head even without permission lol.

I didn’t end up in community college because it was the easiest path I ended up here because it was the most realistic and honest one. My life has been shaped by instability, by moments where basic needs came before long term plans. I’ve been homeless multiple times, moving around and figuring things out one day at a time. Those experiences forced me to mature quickly, to think practically, and to see education not as a distant dream but as a tool for stability and direction. Community college gave me the structure and flexibility I needed to rebuild from that foundation. It’s affordable, but more importantly, it gave me the space to experiment to find what I’m truly good at and what I actually care about. I chose to major in Math because it’s objective, reliable, and interesting. Math doesn’t bend to opinion or emotion, it’s pure truth, and in a world that often feels unstable, that kind of certainty matters to me. Being here has also taught me independence. I’ve learned to plan, to manage my time, to handle setbacks without losing focus. There’s something humbling about starting small knowing that every class, every credit, is a step toward something greater. I’m not in a rush to catch up with anyone else. I’m building carefully, intentionally. My future goals are centered on growth and application. I plan to transfer to a UC school maybe Berkeley or Santa Cruz and finish my bachelor’s in Mathematics. From there, I want to pivot into a field that combines logic, problem solving, and creativity, like quantitative analysis or software engineering. I already have experience with C++ and JavaScript, and I’ve started creating small projects to connect math with real world systems. Eventually, I want to create something of my own whether it’s software, a business, or a framework that reflects how I see the world: structured, logical, but adaptable.

At the end of it all, what do you have to show for yourself. These are the words of my mother’s friend, a woman who came from Mexico with nothing but sheer determination to be better, always. That question has stayed with me because it forces me to look beyond daily struggles or short term wins and consider what kind of impact I leave behind. To me, legacy is not about money, titles, or recognition. It is about the ways you influence others, the example you set, and the standards you hold yourself to even when no one is watching. Legacy is the mark you leave through your work, your integrity, and your persistence. My upbringing has shaped my understanding of legacy more than anything else. I have experienced instability and homelessness, and I’ve seen firsthand how circumstances can limit opportunity if you don’t work intentionally. Those experiences taught me resilience, resourcefulness, and the value of self reliance. They also showed me how cycles of hardship can repeat if you are not deliberate about breaking them. From my family, I inherited determination, a drive to improve, and the awareness that nothing is guaranteed. From my challenges, I learned discipline, adaptability, and the importance of building a foundation for the future so you can have something to show for yourself. I plan to continue breaking cycles by using education, focus, and initiative to create stability and growth in my life. Completing my associate’s degree in Math, transferring to a UC school, and pursuing a career in quantitative analysis or software engineering are part of that plan. Beyond career success, I want to build systems of support for others whether through mentorship, teaching, or simply leading by example so that the cycles of struggle I experienced do not define the next generation. I hope to leave a legacy that combines tangible success with kindness, integrity, and thoughtfulness, so the example I leave encourages others to strive and persevere even when circumstances are difficult just how those words spoken to me changed me, molded my way of thinking into something else, something good. At the end of the day, legacy is the proof of how you lived, how you influenced, and how you rose above limitations. It is about showing up for yourself and others, and making sure that the path you leave is one that others can follow toward something better. Legacy is by definition is the impact you leave. I want to impact myself, I want to impact others. I want to be the best I ever was. Thank you so much for this opportunity. (I don't have the person mentioned in this essay but I'll provide the next closest inspiration in the photos)

Hello, my name is Alan, but I go by Joshua. I am someone who values curiosity, discipline, and growth. I enjoy playing chess online but in person is better. I also enjoy skating, walking with my mom and sister, sewing and tailoring clothes, and creating sculptures in my uncle’s workshop. Working alongside him has taught me patience, focus, and attention to detail. I am also deeply interested in nutrition, diets, and the science behind health, longevity, and optimizing the body. I guess you can say that I am interested in biohacking. These interests drive me to learn more, think critically, and experiment with ways to improve both my life and the lives of those around me as I always discuss my findings with my relatives. I assume this part of me is because I always wanted to go to med school to become a doctor. I actually had decided that I would either be a cardiologist or anesthesiologist. Its not currently in my future aspirations but who knows, I might change my mind. Going to college represents opportunity, focus, and the chance to turn curiosity into real world impact. I am currently working toward an associate’s degree in Math, with the goal of transferring to a UC school to continue building the foundation for my future. I am interested in fields like quantitative analysis, software engineering, or finance, and I have already begun exploring side projects in programming and algorithmic trading. These experiences are not just about learning skills but they are also about proving to myself that I can take initiative, create meaningful results, and have constant growth in any aspect. This scholarship would make a direct difference in my life by allowing me to dedicate myself fully to school and my growth without being held back by financial constraints. It would help me focus my energy on learning, building projects, and preparing for a future where I can contribute meaningfully to the world. Beyond academics and career, I also strive to be someone my family, friends, and community can rely on. A person who works hard, helps others grow and learn while setting an example of dedication and perseverance. The main trigger for this motivation would be my mother's friend who is a really hard worker and is the definition of excellence, as an immigrant she came to this country with nothing but her heart and determination and succeeded. Her words: "In the end what will you have to show for your work and efforts of living". I want to leave a mark. Kalia’s story and legacy resonates with me because she embodied excellence, drive, and impact. I hope to honor those values in my own life. Thank you so much for this opportunity.

I love math because it is one of the few things in life that feels completely honest. There is no bias or hidden meaning in numbers. Two plus two will always equal four, no matter who you are, what language you speak, or what country you live in. That kind of objectivity is special. Math doesn’t bend to opinion or emotion. It simply exists as truth, waiting to be understood. In a world full of uncertainty and subjectivity, math is something that will forever stay consistent. Mathematics has shaped human history in ways that are easy to overlook. Every major civilization that advanced did so because of math. From the Egyptians building pyramids to the Mayans tracking time to modern engineers sending rockets into space, progress has always relied on numerical understanding. Even philosophy and science were built on mathematical thinking. It gave structure to reason and allowed people to explain the natural world in ways that words alone could not. When I study math, I feel connected to that long history of people trying to understand reality through logic and precision. What makes math fascinating to me is that it describes both the physical and abstract sides of existence. It explains the path of planets, the growth of populations, and the shape of light. Yet it also defines patterns in art, architecture, and music. Math shows that order exists even in chaos, that there are rules beneath what seems unpredictable. That realization feels profound to me because it suggests that truth is not random and that it’s discoverable. I also appreciate that math demands accountability. You cannot fake an answer. You either understand it or you don’t, and that honesty forces growth. It teaches patience, discipline, and attention to detail. Every problem solved feels like uncovering a small piece of universal truth. A step towards knowing: "The why". Math is our way of communicating with the universe.

I am passionate about being a first-generation Mexican American college graduate because it represents more than just earning a degree. It means changing the direction of my life and the generations that come after me. My family came to the United States focused on surviving. Their days revolved around work, rent, and food. Education was not something they had time or access to. My mom helped me in school until I got to the second grade, from then I was on my own. For me, being in college is not just about getting a job. It is about proving that their sacrifices meant something. Being first-generation means facing challenges that others never have to think about. I do not have anyone in my family who can explain how college works or what steps I should take next. Every decision takes extra effort and I have to learn through research, trial, and error. I have made mistakes, but I have also learned how to adapt quickly. Each success feels like I am clearing a path that was never there before. It is not easy, but I would rather struggle building something new than accept limits that were placed before me. As a Mexican American, I also feel a sense of pride and responsibility. Many people in my community grow up believing that higher education is too far out of reach. Sometimes we are told to focus on working, not learning. I want to challenge that mindset. I want to show that it is possible to come from hardship and still build a future worth being proud of. I do not see education as a privilege. I see it as a tool to make life more stable, to create security that my family never had. My background has made me appreciate things that others might take for granted. I know what it feels like to not have a stable place to live. I know what it is like to balance responsibilities while trying to keep moving forward. Those experiences have taught me persistence and resourcefulness. Those experiences are the reasons why I can't and won't give up, I need to break this cycle and become better. To me, becoming a first-generation Mexican American graduate is personal. It is a symbol of progress and change. It is about showing that where you start does not have to define where you finish. I want to create a future that proves struggle can turn into strength.

Building credit early matters to me because I’ve seen what happens when you don’t have it. Being homeless multiple times taught me that financial stability isn’t just about money, it’s about having access and options. Without credit, you’re limited. You can work hard, save money, and still be locked out of housing or basic opportunities because the system doesn’t see you as "trustworthy" on paper. I don’t ever want to be in that position again. I plan to take control of my financial future by staying consistent like paying bills on time, keeping my credit utilization low, and avoiding unnecessary debt. I’m not trying to build wealth overnight I just want to have control over my life and not rely on chance or other people to survive. These habits might seem small, but they’re helping me build structure and discipline which is something I didn’t always have. A smart money move I’ve made is learning to prioritize needs over impulses. When I finally started earning a little money, it was tempting to spend it right away after going without for so long. Instead, I started building a small emergency fund and focusing on necessities first. The financial lesson I learned the hard way is that desperation makes you vulnerable to bad decisions and its like borrowing or buying things that feel urgent but aren’t actually helpful long term. What motivates me is the idea of being self sufficient. I’ve seen instability, and I know what it costs emotionally and affects your overall productivity. I want to build a life where I don’t have to constantly worry about where I’ll be next month. Having control over my finances means having control over my future and that’s what keeps me moving forward. One of the things that I want to do with credit is purchase properties with in Mexico so I can get a "sorta passive" income. The point of credit is to leverage it to your advantage. I could just wait until I could afford a property in Mexico, sure but that would take me a good while of working but with credit I can get a mortgage and have the property being rented so it pays off itself fully or mostly, that way I don't have to wait as long. I don't want to wait and then miss an financial opportunity. Thanks so much for this opportunity, if I win I would use it appropriately.

I’m a fan of Wicked because it flips the conventional story in which everyone thinks they know and makes you question who the “villains” really are. Most people see the Wicked Witch as evil, but the story dives into her choices, her perspective, and the society that misunderstands her. That kind of storytelling appeals to me, misunderstood characters. It’s not about who’s “good” or “bad,” it’s about context, motive, reasoning, perspective etc. All of these things I find important in my life. It shows how the same actions can mean completely different things depending on who is watching and what they expect. Elphaba’s struggle is felt because it’s not just about magic or power, it’s about being forced to navigate a world that constantly misjudges you. That tension between who she is and how the world sees her is compelling and it mirrors the way society often rewards conformity and punishes individuality. She’s someone who refuses to bend to expectations, even when it’s costly, and that makes her important to understand. I think Wicked works because it makes you see the world differently, or at least question what you think you know. It’s about looking at situations from a different angle and realizing that people aren’t always what they seem. That’s the part that sticks with me, and also I had a really good time watching it with my mom and sister.

I have faced significant adversities, including periods of homelessness, which have forced me to develop resilience, independence, problem-solving skills and most importantly deep introspection. I know what I want. These experiences have given me a perspective and determination that most applicants simply would not have. Despite challenges, I have maintained my focus on my education while working full time and part time jobs. I have shown signs of personal growth, mentally and physically, showing that I can thrive even under circumstances that might overwhelm others. This scholarship would support my education and it would allow someone who has overcome seemingly impossible or demotivating obstacles to fully pursue their potential. My advantage is that I won't quit.

Hello, my name is Alan but I prefer to go by Joshua (second name). I enjoy playing chess, im currently rated 1900-2000. Any chance I get to play someone in person I always do since I mostly play online. I like to skate, walk with my mom and sister, sew/tailor clothes, make sculptures at my uncles workshop (He is an artist). I am currently really obsessed about nutrition and diets, the biochemistry, evolutionary changes in our physiology, optimization, longevity and overall health. I have many future goals. The first step would be to finish my associates in Math and successfully transfer to a UC School, maybe Berkeley, Santa Cruz or even Stanford?? After that it seems like graduating with my bachelors. This is where it gets tricky, I dont know for certain which career I want but I know that with a degree in Math and some meaningful side projects I can easily pivot into any of these interesting roles, those being investment banking, software engineering or quantitative analyses. All the while I successfully achieve these goals I will make side projects, I have already done some regarding software engineering as I know how to use C++ and javascript. This skill is highly transferable to quantitative analyses which is already a small but important success for me. I believe I should create software in that is related to quant like algorithmic trading. I will also try myself at other entrepreneur businesses. For example, im really good at chess and I have experience teaching senior residents the game, I was thinking I could do online remote 1 on 1 classes and if successful I could start producing chess courses based on knowledge I already have. Further and aside from my career and financial success I would also like to have a family. I would like to have at least 5 children with one beautiful lady and maybe live in europe. Im not exactly sure, in some variations I am living in europe, others I am here in the states. Sometimes I picture myself living in a farm and other times I picture myself living in San Fransisco, the city I was born and partially raised. Im quite fond of this city, i have memories since I was 2 years old and most of them are me and my mom walking through the city, taking bart, the bus… it makes me happy. This scholarship will allow me to use all of my energy and focus while I am a full time student. I strongly believe I will use it correctly to improve and for success. Thank you for this opportunity.

My current Major is Mathematics, im not exactly sure what my career would be but seeing as its a flexible and related degree and I have projects made for the careers im interested, Investment Banking, Software engineering or Quantitative Analyst, I have much time to make that decision. Coming from a Mexican household there was always domestic abuse. Living in this environment I was conditioned to think a certain way, I always thought it was normal and acceptable for parents to beat their children. I always thought that I can never defend against the unjustified blows my dad gave me or even speak against them. I always thought they were justified to make myself a better person, which is what my dad would tell me, “Te estoy pegando para que seas una mejor persona”. My dad would also kick me out many times and I would be homeless up to 2 weeks as I had no relatives nearby and given the way I was raised I was naturally antisocial and reserved, so I had no friends to rely on. My dad took away all the confidence I had and reduced me to insecurity. I remember describing to someone that living with him was like mental torment, their was no pleasing him. Breathe a certain way and you’ll get smacked or yelled at. This sounds ridiculous, it is, but this was reality for me. It wasn't until my dad was in the process of kicking me out at 18 for good that he also tried punching me while yelling, “Te voy a mandar al hospital cabron”, that I decided to break out of that slave mindset, to not allow him to hit me because he is the “master” or the head of the household. That is when I grabbed his wrists and told him that he wasnt going to hit me anymore and I left. Ever since I left I have had struggles with paying bills, unemployment and homelessness but I see these as step towards progress. I have completely changed. I no longer believe it is acceptable to hit a child or even yell angrily, there should be a way with words without aggression always. It is a cycle that needs to stop. The few people that know me have told me that ever since I left I have truly flourished both physically and mentally. I am no longer anti social, I can converse with anyone including other homeless people as I try not to judge but rather experience the beauty and art of maintaining connection through communication. Many stubborn concepts that were wrong from my father’s conditioning are gone. I have learned to appreciate my body and mind more. I have realized that I am capable of breaking barriers, those barriers that seem impossible to break. I want to break them all.