Relaxing is a difficult thing for some. With the stressors and struggles of daily life, some people believe that relaxing is a waste of time and that during that time, they could be doing something productive with themselves. However, I oppose this commonly held belief. I care for myself by doing nothing. Absolutely nothing. Besides living. The most comfortable and pleasurable activity is doing nothing. Laying down and just staring at the sky or staring out the window. Allowing yourself to surrender completely and wholly to nothingness. Not thinking about anything. Emptying the mind and being deprived of sensation or thought. Not thinking about the to dos on my list. Not thinking about past mistakes or imaginary scenarios. Not thinking about the uncomfortable feeling of the clothes on my skin or my body on the hardground. Not thinking about anything. Just living. By allowing myself to take a break from the constant thoughts and feelings of life, I am able to just stop for a moment and restart. This doesn’t have to be long; it could be a few minutes or even a few seconds. This mental reset allows me to appreciate everything that I have and allows me to get rid of the stresses weighing on my mind and body. A reset that allows for a fresh and clear head. An ease of mind. Doing nothing is to care for myself.

To me, confidence is feeling good about myself. It is being able to appreciate myself and the journey that I took to get to where I am. Confidence is knowing that I am enough and that I can be who I am without regret. Confidence is understanding myself and who I am. Confidence is putting trust in my being and abilities. It is believing that I am enough. Throughout my childhood, I was afraid to raise my hand whether I knew the answer or not. I was afraid to wear certain clothes. I was afraid to walk out my house without at least three looks in the mirror. I was afraid to share my likes and dislikes with others. I feared failure. I constantly compared myself to others. I quit too easily, too quickly. That was all in the past. With time and experience, I learned that it doesn’t matter what others think and rather what I think. It isn’t about how I want to be, but instead how I can get to who and how I want to be. I learned the importance of “at least I tried” rather than never knowing what “could have” happened. I learned to depend on myself and to surround myself with people who would acknowledge me for me. While I am still learning, I am actively pushing myself to be comfortable with the uncomfortable. I am pushing myself to try new things that would bring me satisfaction. I dropped the “I can’t” and faced the things that scared me. I realized the elements that limited my confidence and made an effort to improve in that specific area or cut it out of my life. I stopped comparing myself to others and recognized the worth in what and who I am. I accepted myself.

Patience is a fundamental aspect of caring for others and building relationships. Patience is understanding the shortcomings of oneself, the shortcomings of others, and then accepting them. While there is no definite definition or representation of patience, a nurse must have patience. Patience is an essential capability and artistry that is especially beneficial and indispensable to those in the healthcare field. To be patient, a nurse must have mindfulness and the conscious ability to know how and when to react to and interact with a patient. As a future nurse, it is absolutely vital that I possess the patience necessary to provide care and respect to others. Without patience, a nurse cannot properly serve and assist the patient who is in one of the most vulnerable times of their lives. Without patience, a nurse cannot communicate with a patient in pain or a patient in distress. A lack of patience between nurse-patient interactions can mean the difference between life and death for them. Without patience, a nurse cannot fully accept a patient to draw out their thoughts, feelings, and concerns and cannot build the mutual trust and respect necessary to heal and connect with them. Without patience, neither can I call myself a nurse nor do I deserve to be one. Patience is important to me because it demonstrates my own personal and professional promise to help others. Patience is important to me because it shows how my experiences and knowledge has developed into a maturity that reveals itself through the interactions with others. Patience is important to me because with it, I can properly support and help the patients that I am sworn to serve. By putting aside my own shortcomings, I can better be of service to those in need of healing.

As the first-generation college student pursing a career as a Neonatal Nurse Practitioner, I have come to realize the push that I needed to understand my aspirations to improve and impact the community. Being a first-generation college student, I have become a role model for the younger children in my family. At family gatherings my aunts, uncles, and younger cousins would always bombard me with questions about school and my future. Growing up around immigrants and refugees, they placed their aspirations for the future onto my narrow shoulders. I felt the pressures and anticipations of the family members who were unable to attend college and those who were unable to chase after their dreams. Although I am burdened with their high expectations, I decided to pursue a career in the healthcare field for myself. While I decided on this career based on personal interest, I hold great satisfaction and joy in being able to help others around me. Being able to impact the lives of others and build meaningful relationships is what I believe to be my sole purpose in life. To elevate the lives of those around me and make the world a better place one action at a time is my main goal. By using my motivation and my family's inspirations to my advantage, I can construct the ideal world that I believe we can achieve together in the medical field. As a nurse I can directly interact with patients and experience a new challenge daily. I decided that I would aspire to become a nurse in order to give back to others during their time of need. A nurse is instrumental in the proper function of society and I knew that I wanted to make a difference through my interactions with the healthcare team and patients around me. In hindsight, I am truly grateful for the pressures and weight that was placed upon me at a young age because that experience has led me to develop into the person with the values I hold today. I thank my parents, my family, my younger siblings, my teachers, and the people who have paved the way of the healthcare field for helping me fully grasp my dream. As a result of their actions and impact on society, as well as on myself, I have realized my calling and the influence that I can make on the people around me today and in the future. Once again, I accredit the entirety of my ambitions in the healthcare field to the fact that I am a first-generation college student and to the supportive influences of my family.

For the first time in my life, I tried indoor skydiving. Although it was a simulation of the real experience, it made a momentous impact in my life by opening my eyes to the thrill and excitement of trying something new. I was absolutely terrified of the ginormous fan blades below my feet, but realized that I had more fun than I initially anticipated. By expanding my horizons and confronting this challenge, I was able to grow in character and now am able to say that I have indoor skydived!